636: Verified Terrorists

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Welcome to Grumpy Old Geeks. I'm Jason DeFilippo. And I'm Brian Schulmeister. Quick update, Brian. The story I was talking about last week about the Diploma Mills was not from 404 Media as previously reported by me. I got it confused with a story from 404 that was about fake IDs using AI.

But the story about the Diploma Mills was from Darknet Diaries. So, see, shit happens is what I got to say. You miscurated. I did. I miscurated. Yep. That's exactly what I did. All right. I highly recommend the Darknet Diaries episode.

Exact sells fake diplomas and degrees. What could go wrong with this business plan? Wasn't that Trump University, too? It was, yes. Yeah, okay. This is just the Pakistan version. I got to try Exact steaks. I wonder how they are. And Exact water. I'm sure they're great.

I put in a link to the Ookla speed test app Easter egg in the show notes because I got people asking me about it and I could not remember for the life of me how to turn it on. Google people. That's how I found it. Yeah, well, we turn into Google, Brian, as soon as we open our big ass mouths.

I know. I'm on my family's Google. I'm on my friend's Google. I'm currently the Google at my office. Yeah. In the news. Hat tip to Yuri here.

He sent this one before I even caught it. Just to keep the pink slips chat going on, Paramount is doing some work. Paramount Global will lay off hundreds of employees following a record-setting Super Bowl that garnered more than 123 million viewers across all company platforms led by CBS. Yes, but that's not stopping them from cutting people's jobs.

About 800 employees or roughly 3% of Paramount's workforce, sources familiar with the matter told Yahoo Finance. Here's the bullshit speak from Paramount CEO Bob Backish. I am confident this is the right decision for our future, he wrote. These adjustments will help enable us to build on our momentum and execute our strategic vision for the year ahead.

And I firmly believe we have much to be excited about. He continued. Hopefully that means better Star Trek. Yeah, we'll see. We'll see. Or selling and rolling up into something else because that's probably what's going to happen. Probably what's going to happen, yeah. Continuing on, Instacart lays off 250 employees or 7% of its workforce to quote-unquote reshape the company.

In an SEC filing, Instacart says the layoffs will allow it to better align its organizational structure with current quote business needs. Stop. Jesus, fuck. Even you can't work through their bullshit. No, I can't. It's too thick. Business needs, top strategic priorities, and key growth opportunities.

Yes, a.k.a. business. They all want to do business. Yep, business people doing business. Well, so after 800 and 250 employees, 60 may not seem like much, but for Mozilla, that's about 5% of its workforce. Which is amazing.

I thought that would be about 100% of its workforce about now. Yeah, these days, I don't know. So, yeah, Mozilla is firing around 60 people, so that's about 5% of its workforce. Most of those who are leaving worked on the product development team. Okay. What else do they do? I don't know what they've been doing, but here's their bullshit speak.

We're scaling back investment in some product areas in order to focus on areas that we feel have the greatest chance of success, some Mozilla spokesperson told Engadget in a statement. To do so, we've made the difficult decision to eliminate approximately 60 roles from across the company. We intend to reprioritize resources towards products like Firefox Mobile, where there's a significant opportunity to grow and establish a better model for the industry.

Let me translate. There's a significant opportunity to grow, meaning nobody uses your shit now, so the entire internet is your opportunity to grow your bullshit product. Most downloads ever, Jason. Most downloads ever. Because they got one, finally. Have you ever tried that thing?

No. I stopped using Mozilla decades ago. Yeah. Yeah. It feels like it. Definitely feels like it. Yeah. Oh, God. Well, a court has ordered Elon Musk to testify in the SEC's investigation of his Twitter takeover, so this was a tentative ruling made back in December, but now it's not tentative anymore, so you've got to go and talk.

So they have some questions about how you ended up taking over Twitter, which you now call X, but nobody else does. Yeah. All the things that we talked about at the time, not disclosing his stakes in Twitter, not basically just lying and being a dick. Oh, you mean Elon's going to Elon?

Yeah. Okay. And by the way, I finally figured out, this is where I'll draw the line on the Twitter, X, Twitter formerly, X formerly noticed Twitter, all that shit. Yeah. I'm going to call it Twitter until they change the URL. If I got to go to twitter.com, I'm going to Twitter.

Once they change it to X, I'll go to x.com. I'm just going to call it Twitter until it disappears. Yeah, next week probably at this rate. And keeping on with the good news from Elon, Tesla driver says he's not sure if he killed a pedestrian because he was on autopilot.

Wait, I have questions, but I'll let you continue. Everybody has questions here. A 42-year-old Tesla driver who first denied that he killed a woman with his Tesla is now claiming he can't remember because he was checking his emails because he had autopilot on.

Hmm. Yeah, I mean it's not a laughing matter that he actually killed somebody with his Tesla. No, no, no, no. But, yeah, and he hasn't even been charged yet. But they've gathered enough evidence.

They've pinged his cell phone at the location. They've got, you know, his car that has been dented and hair and blood samples from the actual vehicle. So they think they got their guy, right? You think. They haven't charged him yet, but he's coming out ahead of the game saying, I had autopilot on.

Not my fault. I like checking my emails on the way to work when I should be paying attention to the road. So I think they're probably trying to move him into an involuntary manslaughter charge instead of like fleeing the scene.

You know, hit and run. This is probably going to get less. I mean, obviously this is a load of shit. But, again, if you have a CEO of a company who keeps coming out and calling it self-driving and keeps releasing it and keeps pushing the self-driving bullshit line, well, some people are going to believe that.

Yeah. Bad marketing actually kills. Yes. It actually kills. Yeah. And bad self-driving also kills cars because I love it. You don't generally see this in San Francisco, but a crowd of vigilantes basically torched a Waymo car in San Francisco.

Just said, fuck it. We've had enough. We've had enough. They just lost it? They lost it. Okay. They lost their shit. Yeah. So, yeah. Listen, San Francisco, I lived in the Venice Santa Monica area during the height of not only Bird, but Prius. And I kept my cool.

Yeah, well. I'm just saying. I think San Francisco is a little bit different now than it used to be. Right. Yes. I mean, it was devolving into the land of man poo and homelessness before I left. And it's gotten apparently just apocalyptic there now.

So, and thus the burning of the self-driving. I mean, how in San Francisco of a headline can you get? You know, vigilante crowd destroys autonomous, like driverless vehicle. That is something as we were, when we were kids, was just straight out of sci-fi.

And now it's just. That could be a paragraph in Snow Crash. Yeah. And now it's just normal. Yeah. It's like, well, of course they did. Of course they, of course they torched it. Yeah. Because apparently one hit a bicyclist the other day. So, that's, you know, you don't get the fixie, fixie wheeling vegans on your bad side because they will fuck you up.

Kill the robot, kill the robot. What else we got? All right. 23andMe. 23andMe is in a death spiral. Almost anybody who wanted a DNA test already bought one. There's been a nightmare data breach that has ruined the company's reputation. And the stock is so close to worthless it might actually get kicked off the NASDAQ.

So, what do you do? Well, CEO Anna Wojcicki. Wojcicki. Yes. So good. Well, she's basically running around and letting investors know, well, we got one other thing we could do. We're going to make a lot of money. We're just going to sell all the DNA data. That's it.

Which they said that they would never, ever do. Exactly. And this is basically a no-win situation if you're concerned about this and you know 23andMe has your data because either the company survives by selling the data or it'll go out of business, get purchased and sold off for parts, which means other companies will get to sell off your data.

Which I thought already had happened. I thought that was already done. They had made a deal with one particular healthcare provider. I think that was the thing. And it was, you know, with all the caveats of, of course, it's randomized and anonymized data, which it's not. Oh, of course.

But yeah, so now that that exclusive deal is gone, so they are free to sell left, right, and center. Except for the fact that they said they'd never do that. Yeah. I mean, all it takes is a terms of use update that nobody pays attention to and it's done. Exactly. Yeah. Yeah. So there you go. It's all out there.

So I was pretty pissed off about this. Amazon basically, you know, saying we're going to put ads into the Prime video experience that you are paying for if you're a Prime member. Oh, yes. And everybody was pissed off about this. And of course, the class action lawsuit is coming.

But there's been a new wrinkle in this as well. In addition to getting the advertisements, if you don't want to pay that extra $3 per month to not get the ads, you also don't get Dolby Vision or Atmos. So they're not just adding ads. They're stripping features. They're stripping features as well.

Yeah. Yeah. Let's sue the fuck out of them. Yep. The lawsuits are coming. And the California federal court has already started one, so it's going to be filed pretty soon. Expect to get your $2 out of this because there's absolutely no chance that they aren't violating the terms of the agreement that they made with all of us.

Yep. I turned on Mr. and Mrs. Smith, the new show, and got the notice that ads were going to be in there. And I'm just like, okay, well, it supremely pissed me off. Just the notice that they were doing it pissed me off. Just the principle of the thing. I'm paying for it already.

Yeah. Not to mention that the show was trash. So I protested by not watching the rest of the series, so they don't get to get my ads anyway. Right. Still got your money, though. Yeah, they do. Well, they didn't get my $2.90.

Now, $3. I'm not going to give them my $3. Yeah. Kiss my ass. Not like they've got that much to watch anyway. The Taliban has shut down the Queer.AF domain, which, by the way, is a great domain. It is. I've got to say, that is a great domain, which has, in turn, shut down a big Mastodon community.

So that kind of sucks. But, you know. Well, they just got to repoint their, get a new domain name. They'll be fine. Spread the word. Yeah, they could get Queer.ly. Oh, wait. That's Libya. That's why I left Libya. Yeah. I had dastardly, dastard.ly.

When I was working for Coldplay, we had the .ly as a short domain. It was like cdp.ly or something like that. News links and all that. And I remember I felt dirty every time I had to go in and renew the domain because I was like, I know where this money is going.

Exactly. Yeah. I just – I ended up dumping them just because I knew at some point this was going to happen and I didn't stick around to find out. But, yeah, this is what happens when terrorists run your country and don't like gay people. Yeah. So speaking of terrorists, Elon was giving blue check marks to literal terrorists.

Hey, anybody pays up. Yeah. Yeah. I'm sure Amazon gives Atmos to anybody – any terrorist paying the extra three bucks too. That's right. That's right. So basically he's in big trouble on this one too because he was taking money from groups that the U.S. government said you're not allowed to actually do business with.

Yes. The U.S. Department of the Treasury's Office of Foreign Affairs – or Foreign Assets Control, the OFOC. Rolls off the tongue. Yes. Elon should be saying, oh, fuck. Here comes OFOC. So, yeah. He was just – he sells check marks to anybody who wants one.

Well, and there's nobody – there's nobody in the building checking anyways. No, there's not. This is an automated process. You put in your credit card. There's your blue check, sir. Thank you very much. They do check if you change your profile picture. Right.

That's what they do check. I have my – I changed my profile to my sexy new profile photo. And they took me down for three – they took my check mark away for three days. Three days. You know how much terrorist activity I could have done in those three days? Well, you know, I only get my terrorist instructions from verified terrorists.

Exactly.

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They're going to burn it. They're just going to burn the damn thing because David Zaslav. Zaslav, yeah. We're trading off on name pronunciations today. I know. Basically, he couldn't get all the money that he wanted. And he's going, instead of, somebody offered him just a little bit less than what he wanted for the movie.

And he said, no, we're just going to take the tax right off and burn the movie. Say, screw it. We need a hero at Warner Brothers Discovery to just drop this on the torrents. Yeah, we do. We definitely do. They should do it as a company and never even admit to it.

That is the cool move. Fine. You want to take the hit for it? Drop it out on Pirate in Bay. Yeah. So, and we also need a hero in Congress to step in and say, you guys got to stop doing this shit. Yep. You know, they're just stealing taxpayer money by doing that. That's all they're doing.

Yeah, it's corporate fuckery. Yeah, and in plain sight, which is the really shitty part. Yep. Oh, well. Watched a movie with the wife called Past Lives. This is an Oscar-nominated movie. It is the kind of movie that you don't watch much anymore since superheroes have taken over.

It is slow. It is all dialogue. There is not a single special effect anywhere in this movie. It is a small story about two people, and they grew up together and then moved apart and then have one day that they spent around each other talking about their lives.

That's it. And it was fucking phenomenal. All right. It was great. I highly recommend it. Storytelling. Miss it. Yep. And then I watched The Greatest Night in Pop over on Netflix, which is all about the We Are the World recording sessions and how it came to be and everything.

I had not realized they recorded everything, and this is fascinating. It's just really cool, not only to see, like, all these mega celebrities back in their prime back in the day and then realizing how much fucking plastic surgery most of them have had since then.

No doubt. But just how they interacted with each other and seeing people, like, fanboying and fangirling over other people and just the whole process and just the art, the artistry involved and the egos and just – it's insane. I can't recommend it enough, especially – well, I – this will mean absolutely fucking nothing to anybody younger than us.

But for us, this is great. Yeah, it's fantastic. We're watching it in chunks. Yeah, it's hard to sit down and watch the whole way through, so I would do that too. Yeah, we're doing, like, half an hour chunks, and we did the first half hour, and it was just – it was fantastic. And we're like, we don't want to get burnt out on it, so let's just take it a block at a time.

Like, I don't know how far – It's really cool. I don't know how far you've gotten in it, and it's not really a spoiler. This is stuff that happened a long time ago. But there is a moment where Sheila E. finally recognizes that she is only there because they wanted Prince there. Yeah. And she totally – she gets it.

Like, it's pretty cool. So I don't watch a lot of stand-up comedy anymore just because I found it's not that interesting to me. But this one was kind of going semi-viral, and I'd heard a lot about it, and some people that I trust told me it was great. So I gave it a go last night.

It's Jacqueline Novak, Get on Your Knees. This is the comedy special that basically is all about the blowjob and uses the blowjob as the motif that the whole show was wrapped around. Okay. It is fucking phenomenal. Okay. Like, there just aren't comedians like this anymore.

This is like Monty Python when I was, like, five years old or Eddie Izzard in my 20s. It is – she is smart. She is funny. She drops references, like Dennis Miller-esque references. You better have – you need a literary degree to probably get everything that she drops in this special.

It is awesome. Like, I can't recommend it enough. It's really good. I will add it to the queue. Yep. And we got some release date news. Somebody feed Phil season seven is coming March 1st. So we're going to get some new episodes. I should hurry up and finish season five and six then. Yes.

I've been holding on to them because, you know, it's just like this feel-good thing. And then as soon as I heard seven was coming, I talked – I said to my wife, like, all right, let's get through those other ones then. Yeah. I can't believe that they made a season seven with most of us who actually like the show holding off on watching five and – I think it's just because we add it to the – we add it to our queue.

They count that as close enough. Yeah. I guess so. You know, whatever metric you want to use, go for it. Yeah. A show I will be watching since it's the final season and I just feel like I have to watch all the Star Trek no matter what. I don't know if you are, but Star Trek Discovery or Disco, fifth and final season will finally – has a release date of April 4th with a two-episode premiere before releasing the remaining eight episodes of the season weekly on Thursdays.

I've never heard it referred to as Star Trek Disco. You know. They sell the shirts. They're awesome. Really? Yeah. Because that is more interesting than the actual show itself. Well, I got to see how they're going to wrap this. I hear it's going to be action-packed.

That's what I hear too. We'll see. So we'll see. Oh, man. Jon Stewart is back at The Daily Show. Did you get a chance to check him out? I haven't because I haven't quite figured out how the fuck I could watch it here in Canada yet. YouTube. Yeah, I guess YouTube. Yeah.

I got to remember to add it to the DVR. But yeah, I just caught it on YouTube. And yeah, God, it's so nice to have him back. It's great. It's not that other show on Apple. Okay. It's just Jon Stewart being back as Jon Stewart at The Daily Show. Yeah, I got to catch that. You just got to watch it. Yeah.

I mean, you get all the feels. So I'm happy he's back. All right. Well, something else that's coming back. Downton Abbey. Why? Well, I'm happy about this because they aren't going to do another movie. They're actually going to do a full seventh season. Why?

I don't know. I like it. I'm happy about it. I can't wait for it. I'm going to watch it. So will you. Are they going to be building websites now? Because we have to be that far in the future that they have to be coming up on the technology revolution. Mary is the Dowager now. Yeah. Seriously.

Come on. Yeah. We'll see. I never even saw the last movie. The movie is just that's why I'm excited that they're actually going to do a season again because they can actually get into stories and not just, you know, do aha moments and all that stuff. Yeah. The movies just seem like a quick series of vignettes of things that you're like, you have to build the story in your head.

It's like later on. Exactly. They're coasting on previous story in the movies. That's why I'm I have hope that a whole season is going to have a story. Yeah. Okay. Anyways, in news of destroying our youth, there's a big Monty Python spat that's broken out on Twitter.

Mostly because it came out that basically like somebody was like, Eric Idle's got a great Twitter presence. I don't know if you follow him. He's very nice. He's very funny. But somebody was like, intimidated that they were all rich. And he was like, I don't know why you think we're loaded. The show that we did for the BBC, the BBC kept all the money.

We made some money from the movies, but that was 40, 50 years ago now. And then he complained because Terry Gilliam's daughter is actually managing the estate and he's not happy about how they do it and blah, blah, blah. And pointed out that John Cleese had fired their previous manager and John Cleese weighed into it.

John Cleese is a grumpy old man. There's no doubt about that. He is a he courts controversy wherever he goes. He's very he would be MAGA if he lived here, I suppose. But he's still kind of funny. I thought he did live here. Doesn't he live in Santa Barbara? I don't know. I thought he still lived in London.

Oh, no. I know Eric. I know Eric Idle lives in L.A. I've been to his house. Yeah. No, we've been to John Cleese's house for one of his movies. I'm almost positive he lives in Santa Barbara. Okay. So, yeah. Well, anyways, he came out and said something like, I always loathe and despise Eric Idle, but that's not what he said.

And he walked it back. It was a joke. Blah, blah, blah. Anyways, I don't like seeing octogenarian previous heroes of mine fighting with each other. Can't they all just get along? Well, John Cleese has always been kind of a dick. Yeah, he has. I mean. He's a funny dick, but he's a dick.

He's a very funny dick, but he's a dick. Yeah. But, yeah. I always thought if they were going to get rid of What's-His-Face from Top Gear, they should have brought John Cleese in to replace him. Oh, my God. That would have been fantastic. That would have been perfect. Perfect. Except he couldn't fit into any cars because he's so damn tall.

That's true. And speaking of Top Gear, there's another special coming. Snooze. Oh, really? Oh, it's called Contractually Obligated is what it's called. It's called We Gotta Get Those Three Bucks for Atmos so you watch it. Yeah.

It's just them doing donuts in the Amazon parking lot now. That's it. So AMC is going to be paying an $8 million class action lawsuit. $8.3 million, actually. They put a tracking pixel on their website and it broke a 1988 law about not selling viewer data.

Okay. So basically they left the Facebook ID in some of their pixel tracking stuff and they left it unencrypted. So somebody found it and said, hey, they're passing along what movies I'm watching. So this literally comes back from, yeah, from the Video Privacy Protection Act from 1988.

So if you went past that beaded curtain and you rented some movies from back there, they weren't able to release that. Exactly. Basically, it was like Blockbuster, you know. So don't go in the back room. So I just thought that was pretty funny. So, yeah, if you're one of those few people, that's why there's only 6 million people are going to be getting paid out on this.

So literally you're going to be getting about $1.50 because nobody subscribes to AMC+. Do you? I wouldn't even subscribe to Plus Plus. Ups and doodads. Well, you remember our good old friend's privacy that advertised with us for a short period of time where you could spin up basically a virtual credit card and use that online.

They're not going to be in business much longer. Okay, why not? Apple Cash will soon offer a virtual card number in iOS 17.4 beta that could be used to shop online where Apple Pay isn't available. That's a new security code for every transaction and the number can be accessed in Safari's autofill for easy use.

So you can basically just set up virtual credit card numbers with Apple now on your phone. Done and done. Taken care of. See you later. Oh, but you got to use Safari. Ooh. I don't like Safari. I'm sure they'll roll this out into other browsers.

Yeah, I'm sure. But that's great. Yeah, no, it's a really – it's a great idea. I'm happy they're going to do it. So no word on if that's going to be international. That was a problem with privacy for me when I moved here, U.S. only. Oh, that's right. Yeah, it's U.S. only. Google's Gemini AI is out and you'll be shocked to hear this.

Even if you delete your conversations, they keep them for up to three years. Even if you opt out because we covered this last week and it was – they opt you into the three years no matter what. You could have opted out and they said they were going to keep it for 72 hours. Nope. Okay.

Google being Google, Jason. Okay. And the funny thing is they've already upped the – it was like Gemini – Gemini – Geminoi. Nobody could speak today. It was Gemini 1.0 last week and now it's Gemini 1.5. They've already revved by 0.5.

Yeah. Now with less privacy. Now with less privacy. Exactly. We need to rename these sections now. I am determined that – because everything now in apps and doodads is going to be just AI-based. And we should have renamed it back when Bitcoin was a thing.

We should have just named it Criminal's Gonna Criminal. That could have been our blockchain segment. And we can just call this one the end of everything because – The only problem is that's work. Yeah. We got to make – We got to write music. We got to get Bob on front of a microphone. Yeah.

Can't we use AI? Yeah. Seriously. Let's call up 11 labs and get Bob cloned. We'll just do that. Sorry, Bob. Okay. So a couple bits of open AI news here. Open AI disrupting malicious uses of AI by state-affiliate threat actors.

Okay. So they are basically taking down – I love this. They disrupted groups called Charcoal Typhoon and Salmon Typhoon from China, Crimson Sandstorm from Iran, Emerald Sleet from North Korea, and Forest Blizzard from Russia.

These sound like World of Warcraft clans. I was going even further back. I was like thinking of my G.I. Joe comics that I read when I was like 10. Oh, yeah. Here comes Agent X from Charcoal Typhoon. Cobra Command. It's called in Salmon Typhoon.

That sounds just like the shittiest superhero power ever. Form of Salmon Typhoon. Still better than that guy that just turned into a bucket of water. Yeah, that's true. The Wonder Twins. They're fucking great. So, yeah.

So they're working to get these guys – The thing is they said that even though we're playing whack-a-mole with these guys, everything they're doing isn't really that bad. They're not really doing anything horrible because it's in their best interest to say, oh, they can't do anything horrible with open AI, you know, because they don't – they're trying to cover it from both ends.

They say, yeah, we got them, but they weren't really doing anything bad because we have guardrails and they can't do anything that bad. So it's a tightrope they're walking over there. You've heard of Sharknado. Well, here comes Salmon Typhoon. I saw this one.

AI companions promise to combat loneliness, but history shows the dangers of one-way relationships. Sadness, they're lies. My friends, sadness, they're lies. Yeah, do not do this, people. No, no, do not do this. Stay away. I mean we've seen the movie Her, so we know that's a problem already.

Yeah. It wasn't that great of a movie, honestly. No, it was a horrible movie, actually. Yeah. Okay. I'm glad I'm not the only one that thought that. No. Oh, that's right. The box office thought that too. So, yeah, there's all these AI companions coming out.

But the next article I have should dissuade you from getting one no matter what. Your AI girlfriend is a data-harvesting horror show. Hey, you don't say that about my girlfriend. She's no horror show. Now we know what Mozilla is up to. This Valentine's Day, a warning about the dark side of AI romance.

Mozilla's privacy-not-included project reveals that AI girlfriends and boyfriends, well, I guess a few boyfriends out there, I'm sure, while marketed as digital companions are actually massive data-harvesting operations. Who would have thunk it? Who would have thunk it? And according to the study, these AI chatbots, including well-known names like Replica and Chai, are prying into users' most personal information, ranging from sexual health to medication use, and in most cases, selling or sharing this data.

Shockingly, these apps are among the worst offenders in Mozilla's privacy review, with nearly all failing to meet basic privacy and security standards. Romantic AI even utilized over, wait for it, 24,000 trackers in just one minute.

How is that possible? Unbelievable. I mean, I feel so bad for people that feel the need to get to this point, but Jesus Christ. Yeah. God. Man, oh man. You know, the initial promise of the internet was like, there will be a lid for every pot out there.

Whatever you're into, you will find people into it. I guess not. Mm-hmm. Yep. People just got lazy, and we lost LiveJournal. Honestly, LiveJournal was where all the weirdos and freaks went. And Tumblr. That was the best place. Yeah, Tumblr for a bit. That wasn't – LiveJournal was just the OG.

I love that. I got more dates on LiveJournal than any other service. Even beat Twitter, believe it or not. So, yeah, this is not surprising. I got another story in a second we'll get to that we'll cap that off with. We've got AI monitoring employee comms for thought crimes in Slack and more – basically, this is an article that talks about how major companies are basically putting out AI sniffers to read your Slack chats, your team chats, your Zoom meetings, and all this crap looking

for thought crimes. Seeing who's getting ready to quit or possibly steal company secrets. Yeah. That kind of thing. Start a union. Right. Start a union. That kind of thing. Oh, Starbucks. Yeah. Don't go on the Starbucks chat. As I say, Starbucks is in there. Yep. Mm-hmm.

That's what I'm saying. Yep. So, somebody gave me a Starbucks gift card the other day and I have no idea what to do with it. I mean, you know, when you're a little blocked up, beats prude juice. No, because you have to stay in the – get in the drive-through line for 45 minutes just to get your coffee.

And I'm like, no, no. I don't know. If you haven't been to L.A., at least out here in the Valley that often, but the drive-through line for Starbucks is usually three blocks long. I don't understand it. I'm like, it's just a cup of coffee. It's the worst coffee. It's just the worst. And it's still just coffee.

Yes. I mean, come on. It's coffee. Yeah. I mean, I won't stand in line that long for In-N-Out and that's like God's Hamburger. So many show titles today. God's Hamburger. It's a shame we're not going to use that one. I know.

I'll have to pull that one back out of the archives sometime. We'll use it for a recap show. You're right though. It is fucking God's Hamburger. I'm dying right now. I'm going to buy a fucking flight just to get a burger. I'll go get us in line right now.

By the time I land. Exactly. We'll be ready to get you in. So chat GPT is going to get a memory. Just what we want. Just what we want. So we can remember all those chats that you had with it late at night when you're beating your meat because chat GPT is your girlfriend.

Exactly. Fantastic. Oh, man. Just one more tracker. One more tracker. 23,998. 23,999. 24,000. Woo! Now, this hasn't been rolled out to everybody yet.

It will be. It will be coming soon for paid subscribers. And the annoying thing about this is, is that it is going to be, it looks like it's going to be global and not chat specific because it would be great if it was just chat specific because you could open up a chat, train that chat and just keep it and just go back to it and reference it and teach it all this stuff.

Yeah, let it become self-aware because you've left it open for three days. Exactly. But I don't want all of it to get thrown into memory because I do put in a lot of random shit, summarizing articles and writing stuff for other people and, you know. I mean, we're going to be writing things about terrorists and blue check marks in Elon in a little bit here.

So I don't want it to remember that for most things. You will be able to wipe it. Selectively or just in general? No, in general. See, that's the problem. If you do selective, that would be nice. You can. You can have it delete specific memories by telling it to.

What's the best way to kill my – delete that one. What are the effects of cyanide on a 47-year-old – I mean, theoretically, if one was going to write a story about killing one's wife, how would one go about it?

And forget I said that after you answered it. Yes, selectively. But remember everything else about me. Yeah, yeah. So there will have some memory management tools. But I think for the most part, it would be great if – like I said, if this was on a per chat thing. Yeah. Because there are things that I want to train it on to do a specific task that I have text expander snippets for.

Yeah. That I just have to put in every time and just to have it trained up and then it's like, boom, okay. No, how great would it be if we could train it in the grumpy old geek's voice? Because, you know, it could just start writing all the summaries for me. Fantastic. But do I want it to do everything in the grumpy old geek's voice? I'd get fired.

I know. Yeah. Yeah. Because I actually started spinning up one of their – what do you call it? Your own ChatGPT AI. Yeah. Because in the marketplace, you can spin up your own and you can train it. And I started throwing our transcripts at it. Oh, great.

Let me know how that's going. It's a pain in the ass because I – first I have to – I'm trying to remember my basic shell scripting 101 and how to use cat. The other day, I actually typed man cat for the first time since probably 1992.

Or when Manimal was on the air. Ah, yes. Man, we're doing deep with references. Yeah. And I'm trying to remember my pipe references. I'm like, how do I – because I need to pipe this directory of files into this and concatenate the entire – Now you're getting into the girlfriend AI again.

Oh, I know. My pipe reference. With my pipe and references. So anyway, we'll get there and we'll have it in some time. But you have to manually – you can't like select a bunch of files to upload. You have to select them one at a time. Right. Which is a pain in the ass. That's why I'm just trying to concatenate the entire thing into one long document.

And since we have 650 of them – At some point, you're just going to be able to dump the RSS feed in. That would be nice. That would be nice. By the time I'm done with it, that feature will come out. Seriously. Seriously. NVIDIA is trying to start a new chatbot that will run locally on your PC, of course, using NVIDIA chips.

Yes. If you've got the NVIDIA GeForce RTX 30 series GPUs or higher and at least 8 gigabytes of VRAM – And you are using it to mine Bitcoin. Exactly. Or ETH. You will be able to run your own personal girlfriend on your own computer.

Oh, how nice. Which is what – look at it. Anybody who's going to have a virtual girlfriend, I guarantee has at least a GeForce RTX 30 sitting around or a couple of them. Come on. That's a good way to destroy my NVIDIA card because I don't like my girlfriend anymore and then delete that.

Oh, man. So, yeah. Wait for that one. OpenAI has also released a new video model called Sora. Now, this has taken over Twitter. This has taken over the world. And I am curious about your point that you don't think that they look good.

Now, obviously, I'm probably seeing a very highly curated feed on Twitter of people that love this product and the videos look amazing. Watch the feet. Okay. Watch the feet. And watch the – there's one with these cubs that are like, give me a video of five cubs playing.

And it starts out with three and then they morph into four and then morph into five and seven and they roll around into this giant hydra of fur at the end. It is a cheap, low-rent acid trip at this point. I'm sure it's going to get better.

But there are things like if you – there's this one of this woman walking – this Asian woman walking in like apparently like, you know, the streets at night. Watch the feet. Watch everybody's feet. Everybody's floating. Nobody has – there's no – there's no permanence in placement.

If you know what to look for, these things are – it's glaring. Okay. If you just look for the basics. So before it was look at fingers. Now it's look at feet. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Ten and ten. Fingers and toes, baby. Fingers and toes. So I'm sure this is going to get better and this – they can do this up to a minute.

But it's not out yet. Right. So think about the Gemini demo that we got a couple weeks ago. Yes. It was like Google Gemini, you know, shave my balls. It's like, okay, done. Show these shiny marbles. No, that's not how good it works. Yeah. And I'm sure that these are highly curated because the only demos that you see right now are the ones that OpenAI released.

Okay. Gotcha. Yeah. So there's nothing out there that – yeah, these are all from them. Okay. So, yeah, just hold on for that. Yeah. Don't fire your VFX crew just yet. And the U.S. Patent and Trademark Office has finally come out and said, no, we're done with this.

AI cannot hold a patent. It must be – it must be – you can use it to help, but you have to prove that a human did the, you know, the majority of the work. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. The humans did the hard parts, please. Right. So there we go.

Okay. Finally. Good.

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At the library. I finished a new book, Jason. It's called Infinity Gate, the Pandemonium Book Number One by M.R. Carey. You just told me not to do any spoilers, so I won't because you're listening to it right now. You can tell me if it's good or not.

Just don't put any plot spoilers. It is good. There is a – in the middle, I got lost for a little bit, and I was like, oh, God, this is dragging, this is dragging, this is dragging. But I love the premise. I like the story.

It ended on one hell of a cliffhanger. It picked up from that middle bit. There was just – there's one character that is a major character, and it was like the origin story of the major – that major character that I was just like not into, and it kind of took me out of the book for a bit. I was debating not finishing it because life is short, but I'm glad I made my way through, so I enjoyed it.

The main conceit is it's basically – we talked about the Long Earth series by Terry Pratchett and Stephen Baxter a lot because we loved it so much. And the skipping over to parallel Earths, this is that, but a different and darker take on it. So I really liked it.

I am not going to go straight into the second book because I've learned my lesson. We talk about that all the time. I'm going to read something else first, and then I'm going to go into book two. All right. Yeah, that's my plan too because I'm about a third of the way into the book, and I dig it. Yeah, it's good. I really dig it. It's good. Yeah.

And because basically your second line in here where you said a different, darker take on the Long Earth, I'm like, sign me up. Sign me up right away. And the other thing is it really made me want to go read the Long Earth series again. I downloaded them all back to my phone, so yeah. Yeah. Because I don't remember the last two because I remember the first three really well, and I don't remember the last two.

I forgot that there were five of them, so I'm very excited. I think that's why because I forgot that there were five as well. I thought there were only three, and I'm like, there were five, and it's marked as red? What? Okay. I guess I'll go back and check them out. Yeah, so at some point I'm going to finish this Pandemonium series. It's only two as far as I can tell, or at least there's just two out, so I suppose when I finish the second one, I'm going to discover this is an ongoing series, of course.

But it's good. It is definitely good, so I'm glad you're along for the ride. The Dark Side. Ha! With Dave. Welcome to The Dark Side with Dave, with podcast superhost Dave Bittner. Dave is the host of the CyberWire podcast for all your cybersecurity news.

The co-host of Hacking Humans with Joe Kerrigan, discussing how humans are mean. The co-host of Caveat with Ben Yellen, because people are nosy. And the host of Control Loop, because industrial machines are going to take over the world because of AI, and people who just want to steal our money, and it's a horrible thing. Hi, Dave. Hello.

Hello, Dave. Hey, listen, before we jump into our scheduled stories here today, I saw in the rundown that you guys were talking about this new thing from OpenAI with the videos. And this was getting lots of conversation around the virtual lunch table here at CyberWire.

And it's really something. Well, I think they look amazing for what they are. I mean, is there a creep factor on some of them? Yes, absolutely. But just, like, I would hate to be in the stock footage business today.

Because I think that, now, we don't know how long it takes to generate these things. So if it takes an hour to generate a one-minute clip, then a stock footage library is still probably the better choice for somebody who uses it regularly.

But to be able to generate anything and have it be photorealistic, especially, like, you know, make a high-wide shot of New York City at dawn. And, you know, boom, there it is. It's pretty amazing.

Yeah, for things like that. The puppies look like puppies. All 17 of them, as they keep replicating. Well, they'll fix that. Let us not forget that, you know, in about two months, when that's a little bit better, our entire feed is going to be flooded with, let's have a video of Joe Biden falling down again.

Yeah. Yeah, that's true. That's coming. That's true. Okay, Dave, I'm going to tell you what. Yeah, it's kind of bad timing. Yeah, it's definitely bad timing. I'm going to tell you what I told Brian. You can tell your Cyber Wire friends. Watch the feet. So when you're watching these people walk, none of them stick.

They're all kind of floating just a little bit, like they've got those roller skate sneakers on, you know? Right, that's true. Or like somebody fell in love in a Looney Tunes cartoon. Yeah. Yeah. Or also like the running loops from like Scooby-Doo, you know, when they'd be running that hallway, their feet wouldn't quite be attached to the floor.

Yeah. Absolutely. And there's one where like one of the people's legs just switch spontaneously. Yeah. And they have trouble with fingers and this, that, and the other thing. But still, with all those nitpicks to just like, yeah, the dogs look like dogs.

That's the thing that gets me, like. Until they split and become multiples and then they're, they're telling you, it's like a cheap acid trip for me. I'm like, I do not, flashbacks, bad, bad. You don't need this. No, I don't. You don't need this in your life. No, I need a safe space.

Asparagus, asparagus. Yeah. Well. It'll get better. But also remember that this is the cream of the crop, the creme de la creme. Yes. The best that they can possibly do. This is being released by them and only them and, yeah. Yeah. I don't know if you've, if you've ever seen the Firefly site from Adobe that has all of their generative AI stuff up there and they have their galleries and stuff like that, that, you know, can be done with it.

There is no way that most people are making that stuff out of that. I try any of those prompts even and it comes out like, like that really horrible scene from The Fly. You know, that's, that's more of what it's like than, you know, some beautiful parrot floating through the air. No, no.

I mean, it's true, but it's also, you know, the, the, the picture of the hamburger up on the menu board at McDonald's bears no resemblance to what they actually give you in the bag. So. This is true. We're used to that. Yeah. Reality is fungible.

Well, we have a bit of Star Wars news. I, I don't recall if you watched this show, Dave, because I remember there was some, you, you were kind of a live action guy and not an animated guy, but, uh, the bad batch is coming season three, which will be the final season on February 21st. I personally love the show.

I think it's, it's really good. So I'm looking forward to this. I'll have to revisit it. My son and I started watching it and, and it just didn't stick. Uh, didn't find the first few episodes all that compelling. Uh, I don't know. Maybe I got, uh, too many Aussies.

I don't know. But, uh, but, uh, but if you say it's good, I'll, I'll give it a revisit. What, what is, what in particular do you like about it? Um, it's just that it's that whole thing that we kind of discussed a bit with the Mandalorian, which is Star Wars that works without a Jedi.

Like we don't need Skywalkers. We don't need Darth Vader. We don't need the empire. It's just like, it's, you know, it's what a good pre Han Solo, like Han Solo origin story should be. It's, it's like these mercenaries out there and just kind of trying to make their way in the universe.

That's not so nice. Yeah. These are the, the blue collar guys in the Star Wars universe. Yeah. So I really enjoy it. It's, it's a good time. All right. No, I'll, I'll revisit it. I don't recall specifically why it didn't stick, but, uh, willing to give it another try.

Do we have any Andor news? Do we know anything about when that's coming back? Season two has finished principal shooting. All shooting is wrapped. So, uh, now they're firing up the AI for the special effects. Okay. Yeah. They were just waiting for this release from open AI to get done. Yeah. So no feet will touch grounds on season two.

Well, and it's okay for the aliens to have multiple weird fingers. Yeah. We're good. It all works out. Yeah. Yeah. Um, I wanted to highlight this story that's been making the rounds. That's pissing me off. Uh, so I, I, that's probably too strong a description.

It's perturbing me. Um, so the, the breathless headlines say, uh, cyber criminals are stealing iOS users face scans to break into mobile banking accounts. Now, the first round of, in fact, cyber, in fact, I think, I want to say that the first round

of this article I've linked to said cyber criminals are stealing iOS users face ID scans to break into mobile banking accounts. Right. Um, I think they've updated, uh, I think they've updated this because scaling it back as we go along.

Exactly. So the idea here is that there are some bad guys, uh, from China who are being called gold factory by, uh, researchers from group IB. And basically what they're doing is, is they're tricking people with iOS devices, um, to install some management software.

And then as part of the onboarding of that management software, they're asking you to go through a facial scanning process. Um, and then they're using the scan that that generates and sends to them. They're running that through, um, uh, deepfake software to then be able to access your bank account.

And get in there. So, and, and this is all, this is taking place primarily in Thailand, um, where the Thai government has a digital app that uses facial scans to provide security. Right. Okay.

So all the articles for this were saying that they were accessing face ID. And this, this was the first time that face ID had been breached in this way. Right. And I read this and I don't think this has anything to do with face ID.

Mm-mm. All they're doing is taking your picture. Yeah. Yeah. Which they can get anywhere. And then running it through. Yeah. Yeah. And because it's my understanding and I reserve the right to be wrong that the way face ID works, you don't have access to it.

It is part of the secure enclave. It does its thing. And all face ID does is say yes or no. Is this the person, like the software asks, is this the person I'm asking it to be? Face ID does the scan and says yes or no. Either this matches our, our preexisting scanner, it doesn't.

But you can't export that data. You don't have access to it. It doesn't provide. So you, you concur. My understanding on that is correct? 100%. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. And yet we have this story. This is still, they forgot the word as.

It's stealing face as ID because that's all it is. There's just people, it's a bad app in Thailand that's using, you know, facial scanning as the ID. And somebody's just getting more pictures and saying, hey, here we go. And then just, you know, probably matching the format and sending it along.

Right. I'm willing to cut them just a teensy-weensy little bit of slack because I think face ID has become synonymous with the term of art of facial scan. Facial scan, right. Holding your phone up, having it look at you and determine whether to give you access or not.

I think people generically refer to that as face ID. Right. So a little tiny bit of slack, but the headlines here have all been just as, as we so often see, breathless about.

Well, the whole time that you were talking about this story, the back of my mind is just like firing off. Goom, goom, goom, goom. Mine too. I'm glad you wrote it. Because this reminds me of how many times we were on this show, this very show, talking about are our phones listening to us and refute it and then the stories keep on coming and there are listening to us and we refute it again and again and again.

Are they though? Are they just like you typed up there and we're saying no. But then we had this big bombshell just a few months ago, right? There was this company that came out and said, why, yes, we are using your phones to listen to you. But we've heard fuck all about that since then.

Whatever happened? I think they're buried outside of Las Vegas. Actually, the only other thing I saw about that was that those claims may have been greatly exaggerated. That's what I figured. And they backed off of them, that they weren't actually listening because it is not practical to do so.

Right. So it was the marketing people exaggerating their capabilities to try to make a sale. Imagine that happening. Oh, my goodness. Never heard of that. Marketing going askew and around. Maybe we should just rebrand this show as Are They Though?

Are they? Yeah. It turns out. Yeah. Yeah. So you can tell I kind of have my dander up about that. But I did share my skepticism about it on Mastodon. And there were some folks who chimed in and said, yeah, I think you're on the right track here.

This doesn't seem to have anything to do with Face ID. No. Are you still on Hackaderm? Is that your Mastodon of choice still? I am indeed. Yes. I am on hackaderm.io. Okay. I just reinstalled it the other day because I wanted to check some things out that I posted up there before. And I have like three different Mastodon accounts on three different servers.

I thought Hackaderm was the one that you set me up with. Yeah. Okay. I've been enjoying it. I have to say the transition from Twitter to Mastodon has suited me well. And I suspect a lot of it is just my personality type. But it seems like folks on Mastodon are less interested in chasing numbers, like follower numbers, and more interested in actual meaningful interaction.

It's, it's, it hasn't been taken over by marketers. Correct. That's, yeah. Or influencers. Or influencers. Yeah. You got to want to be there. That's true. Yeah, you do. That's true. And, and, you know, there's some people have pointed out that in some ways there are people on there who do make it feel like it's an HOA.

You know, you cannot have a purple background. Well, the main thing that, that, the thing that always comes up is if you don't include descriptions of your images that you post, you will be descended upon with great force and reminded in no uncertain terms that you are a horrible person for leaving out, you know, all the people who have vision issues, which is a legitimate concern.

Doesn't AI do that now? No. Well, there is a button. There is a button where you can have it look at the image and automatically generate a description. So. That should just be, they should just bake it in. If you don't put it in a description, boom, that happens. Yeah.

Yeah. Oh, my God. Alt text Nazis. I can't believe it. Well. It's 2024, Jason. And we're still dealing with it. This is true. This is true. So nothing's perfect, but, you know, after the Twitter schism where people went their separate ways, I'm pretty happy landing on Mastodon.

So I think at least for the time being, until it gets ruined, that's where I'm hanging out. All right. Yeah. I've been playing with local large language models on my MacBook Pro. And I was curious if either of you had played with this LM Studio app.

You guys familiar with this? I'm familiar with it. I haven't tried it yet because I just haven't had time. So do tell. I'm very interested in your experience. So it's a free open source project. It's called LM Studio. And basically, it's a front end that lets you load in some of the various open source LLMs onto your system and run them.

You need a powerful machine and you need lots of RAM. I wish I had more RAM. My MacBook Pro has 16 gigs of RAM. Ooh, ooh, ooh, sorry. Yeah, so, well, I mean. For what you normally do day to day, it's more than enough.

Exactly. Day to day operations, all the audio stuff I do, that's plenty. So this is the first time that I've wished I had more RAM. This is also the first time that I've seen all 10 processors on my MacBook Pro pegged when this thing is running.

But it's cool and it works and it's fast and it does what you ask it to do. There is one. I'll include a link. There's one sample library that's called Lily and Lily has been trained on cybersecurity.

All right. Okay. And there are various models that are trained on different things that you might be interested in. So if you're like us and you're a nerdy person who likes playing around with things, I have to say this felt very old school to me in a good way.

It looks that way just from the demos that are running on the site. It's a very appealing old school interface. Yeah. Like you're playing a text game. Yeah. Right, right. For those of us of a certain generation, there's – I say when computers were fun, this is a callback to that I think despite that what ultimately what you're doing is running a large language model on it.

So I'm going to set up Lily and ask Lily if our phones are listening to us. There you go. Please report back. And then finally, I want to include a link here that the folks over at Prop Store have an auction coming up.

So if you're into movie props and things, this is a big one and seems like a good one. One of the highlights here is Anthony Daniels who's C3PO is auctioning off his entire collection. Wow. Must take some money. Yeah, exactly. It's funny that all the other job offers haven't come pouring in for him.

I don't know why. So if you want a screen-used C3PO, you can get one. All right. And you can buy Captain Picard's chair from the bridge of the Enterprise-D.

There's a Stormtrooper helmet from Return of the Jedi. There's an Indiana Jones jacket, stunt person. And these are all screen-used items. So if this is your thing and you're rich, check out the Prop Store auction.

It's a little annoying that just in order to download a PDF of the catalog, you have to register for the auction, which includes putting in your payment information. I think I call foul on that. Yeah. So I'm kind of on the fence if I'm going to do that or not.

I get having to drop an email but not a credit card. Yeah, exactly. As much as I would like to look through this catalog because I try to get out of it. There's a lot of Alien stuff in here. Back to the Future. There's a lot of Back to the Future. And that's my wife's favorite movie. So if I were rich, I would be getting her a very cool birthday present.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Ooh, the producer's assistant. There's some stuff from Blade Runner. Yeah. I was going to say the producer's assistant script from – personal script from Blade Runner. That's kind of cool. Mm-hmm. Yeah, there's a matte painting from Blade Runner. There's – yeah. So I don't know. The prop store folks seem to be at the top of this sort of thing.

And this is a good one. So if that's your thing, check it out. Very cool. Oh, my God. They've got the glaive from Krull starting at $10,000. I wish I was rich. Oh, oh, I want that. First draft script from The Breakfast Club.

That is pretty cool. Surely one of our listeners must be rich. Yes. Yes. We can – we will register for our preferred items. That's right. Wouldn't that be great? I would like lot 193, please.

Oh, my God. What do you think – Harry Potter stuff. That's going to go for a lot of money. Very cool. There are 68 pages of stuff in here. This is insane. Well, I know what I'm doing the rest of the day.

Talk to you guys later. Yeah, I got to get back to this. I'll see you guys. All right. Go. Closing shout outs. Over at Patreon, we've got Brian. And Mason says, keep doing the Lord's work, gentlemen. Best podcast in existence.

Well, thank you, Mason. And thank you, Brian. Thank you. And remember, you too can become a Patreon subscriber for only $3 a month. You can give us more if you want. We'll put it in Atmos for that $3, just like Amazon. You do get it in high res and a little bit early. Could be five minutes.

Could be five hours. It's a game. You just – you take your chance. Over at PayPal, we've got Miles, Shari, Natalie, Linda, Blake Bowling, Nathaniel, Ramsey, Emanuel, Dag, Michael with a big 50 bucks. Woo-hoo. He's the magnet guy. All right.

So he did still listen to the show. He got – he did get his stickers. All right. So thank you, Michael. Gregory also with 50 bucks and Ben with a big $100. And he said, I had a good chuckle when I got mentioned on the show for offering a bribe to get Jason Scanner. So I'm throwing the bribe your way anyways. All the best to you guys.

Thank you, everybody. And over at the tip jar, we've got Theodore, Joseph, Panos, NL, and Sean. Woo-hoo. All right. And we have an anonymous review, but it was five stars. Don't know where this is going. Y'all keep it up. Unlike many TV shows and podcasts, this show just keeps going on with great quality.

Usually after about 20 episodes or less, a podcast becomes complete crap. We did that in three. Been listening for seven years and still feels fresh. I won't stop listening until you guys do. Keep polluting the sound waves with this great podcast. Sincerely, a grumpy young geek. P.S. I'm the Zillennial from last year.

All right. I don't remember there were five books in the Long Earth series. I don't remember his Zillennial from last year. I don't know what I had for breakfast. What am I doing? Why is there a microphone in front of me? Yeah, seriously. This is weird. Until next time, I'm Brian Schulmeister.

You forgot to do the outro. I forgot the outro. I thought we were done. And I'm Jason DeFillippo. Thanks for listening to Grumpy Old Geeks. Show notes and links for everything we talked about today are at GOG.show slash 636. GOG.show slash donate is the place to drop us a few bills so we can keep bringing you this top-notch entertainment.

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