528: Stay Grump Ye

Grumpy Old Geeks. A weekly talk show hosted by Brian Schulmeister and Jason DeFilippo discussing the finer points of what went wrong on the internet and who's to blame. Welcome to Grumpy Old Geeks. I'm Jason DeFilippo.

And I'm Brian Schulmeister. Brian, I've been having a little side project. Okay. It's called The Pivoteer. Ah. Guess what it's about. Reminds me of The Rocketeer. Not pivoting? It's about pivoting, yes. I started one of those fancy sub-stack newsletters. Are they paying you?

No, not yet. I'm doing it free for now. I'm doing it free for now. Eventually, if I get good enough, then, you know, maybe I'll charge a ducat or two. But for now, there's only one newsletter out. I'm going to be publishing twice a week starting next week. A new episode will be – or new episode, new issue will be out on Thursday.

And I think it's pretty fun. And I've pivoted careers a bunch of times. And people always ask me about, you know, was it scary? How did you do it? Blah, blah, blah. So I wanted something fun to do in my side time, which is, you know, not very much. So I started this up. So check it out. It's at thepivoteer.substack.com.

Follow along. It's free. And check it out. There you go. And I found this one that we had missed. It's called, What You Need to Know About Egg Freezing, The Hot New Perk at Google, Apple, and Facebook. And I was like, say what?

They're actually paying people to freeze their eggs? Holy shitballs. Well, they're paying to have people freeze their own eggs. They don't own them. No, they don't own them. Google and Apple and Facebook are not buying people's eggs. That would be fantastic if they did.

That would be a story. Yeah, we need new users. Quick, give us your eggs. Well, I mean, go ahead and go on your thoughts on this because I definitely have my own. See, my thoughts are – I'm 50-50 on this. One is I think it is very idiocracy-laden to make people work more and not have children because anytime I hear people putting off having children, I obviously go to idiocracy.

More on that later. But I – this is a weird perk. I think this is a very strange perk because you know what they're not doing? They're not asking for – to freeze guys' sperm samples just in case. That's because guys' sperm samples will last – because we can have kids until we're 70, Jason.

That's why. Yeah, but stress of working at these companies – No, definitely, but stress of working at these companies will reduce your sperm count to the point where you might not be able to have kids. So as you come in the door, you should give some eggs, give some spooge, and go about your business. That should be table stakes. If they're going to do the eggs, they should do the spooge too.

I'm just saying if you want to be fair – That's absolutely ridiculous. If you want to be fair, if you want to be fair, we're talking about equality nowadays. If everybody wants to be equal, I'm just saying. That's absolutely ridiculous. I know. But you can just say absolutely ridiculous things. You often do.

That's my job. That's my fucking job. I know. No, I think this is – well, okay. It's not a great idea because this should actually be covered by health insurance, but it is not. This is a great idea because health insurance is not covering it.

And it isn't just because people are working and putting off kids to work. There's been – unless you're from middle America and you're marrying your high school sweetheart and you're never planning to travel more than 150 miles from where you were born and you're having kids right away, there's been a massive societal shift in the age at which most people are having kids.

We are pushing it back further and further. Adolescence is extending longer. Everything is extending longer. People are waiting longer to get married. People are waiting longer to have kids. What hasn't changed is female biology. So I think this is a great idea. I've known countless women that have done this, friends and things of that nature, that they're just not ready to have a kid yet.

They're running out of time biologically to do so. They go and freeze their eggs and it is fucking expensive. So great. But this should be covered by health care. Okay. All right. But it's not. All right. So Google does it. Yeah.

It's not. Facebook does it. Anyway. So, but it's nice to know that you can go in and you can get your lunch at Google and then you can go have some eggs extracted. Yep. After you have your free egg sandwich. Yep. Okay.

Kanye has been banned forever from Moron of the Week. So I had to put this here. He found a way to come in though. He did. He slid under this time because Kanye West is no more. He's changed his name. He is now Yee. So I think we should be grumpy old geeks. We'll change our name too.

Because why not? The only thing that really tickled me pink about this was I missed this one too. Back in 2019, he suggested that he might legally change his name to Christian Genius Billionaire Kanye West. Christian Genius Billionaire Grumpy Old Geeks.

Yeah. There we go. New branding. Oh, God. So, yeah. Now he's just Yee. Good for him. Yee. Yee. Yee. I got nothing else with that. It was just like, what the fuck? Whatever. So, and we did make fun of Tesla last week for their self-driving beta to, you know, the civilians on the road.

And, yeah, this isn't a good thing. Why are you doing this? Well, they released 10.3 and immediately had to roll it back because, yeah, it did not go as planned. Because, I don't know, Brian, is it beta software? Yeah. Yes, he tweeted, of course, seeing some issues with 10.3, so rolling back to 10.2 temporarily.

Please note, this is to be expected with beta software. It is impossible to test all hardware configs in all conditions with internal Q&A, hence public data. You mean the beta software you push out to regular users who then use it on the street with the rest of the general public, and then you base your own insurance company off of that beta software?

That beta software? We should expect there to be issues with, you colossal asshole. I know. I mean, it's like, I see a Tesla on the road now. I'm just like, get the fuck away from that thing. Who knows what the hell is going on? It's easy. You know what they need to do? They need a Knight Rider style thing in the front of the car that goes, and it just shows what version of the software they're running.

Seriously. We need to be able to know from the outside what version of the software you're running in there. And I want their driver score prominently displayed on the side because right now you have to have a 100 to be able to get this. And the funny part is, here's the law of unintended consequences at work.

Their 10.3 software actually dinged down the driver score because it works so poorly. Which meant your insurance went up if you bought into that bullshit. Yeah. So it's like, oh, God. Okay. Stop it. Stop it.

Seriously, stop it. Yeah. Don't push nothing to the software. It's the, was it the, not the NTSB, the NHTSQRMFLMNOP is saying, hey, they're going after Elon saying, hey, you need to only release this beta software where it is actually going to be safest.

Like, you know, where people who drive on large two-lane highways and not put it in some podunk rural area where we know that your car doesn't work well with its self-driving software. And will they take that under advisement? Probably. Will they actually implement it? Probably not.

Because, you know, they want to collect as many data points as possible. Yep. Awesome. And Barrett sent this in, so we'll stick with the car thing here. Lyft, just as scummy as Uber. No surprises here. And this is a report that has come out that has revealed more than 4,000 sexual assaults, 10 fatal physical assaults during a three-year span of 2017 to 2019.

Yay. It took them that long to get us data from 2017 to 2019? Well, Lyft's disclosure comes nearly two years after the company initially pledged to release the data. I wonder how many times they tried to massage it and figure out there's got to be a way we can bury this. There's got to be a way we can use statistics.

And they had a room full of mathematicians who finally threw their hands up in the air and said, fuck it. This is bad. We assault people. Oh, and we don't report it, by the way. We wait and let people that were involved, the individuals involved, will report it to the police. We don't do it. You know what happens if you try to rape somebody in Disneyland?

Disneyland fucking reports it. That's what happens. Yeah. Mickey just holds you down physically and says, we're calling the cops. Unbelievable what these companies get away with. I'm wondering if, like, the data scientists implemented surge pricing and Lyft couldn't afford it, so it took them longer to get there.

They had to wait for the surge pricing to go down before they could get their data back. All the Lyft executives are sitting in their offices looking at the app. Hmm, data scientists are almost here. Oh, no, no, no, no, they're 30 minutes away. Oh, no, no, they're almost here. Nope, another year. Another year away.

In the news. Blue Origin, or commonly known as Jeff Bezos' penis rocket, is moving beyond penis rockets. Now they're going to have a vagina space station in space. Ah, so you have to have somewhere to dock that penis.

Yes. So they've announced that they will create what they're calling Orbital Reef, which promises to be something of an industrial and commercial hub and is meant to start operating in the second half of this decade. Yes, the company that has barely left the atmosphere will have a space station in about five years.

Think big, Brian. You gotta think big. Yeah. So they made a bunch of partnerships here. Boeing, Red Wire Space, Genesis Engineering Solutions, and Arizona State University, well known for space. Arizona State University. Yes. And as far as I can tell, they're going to have a McDonald's and they're just going to rent out office.

It's an office park in space. That's what they're going to do. So you'll be able to rent things. Great. So you can fly to space on the Amazon rocket and come back to Earth using Facebook's metaverse, which we'll talk about. You can fly up and put your VR headset on so you can come back to Earth.

Yeah. And Andy sent this in. We'll start on our Facebook stuff now. This is the Facebook block. Here we go. So if you're sick of it, skip ahead. Andy wrote in, Facebook punished. Still a milk money fine. And this is from the BBC. Facebook fined a record 50 million pounds by the UK competition watchdog.

This is all about their purchase of Giphy, their acquisition, because, you know, competing sites use Giphy. So did they buy it just so nobody else could use it? And they were looking into this. And Facebook has not provided any information, ignored many warnings, and committed a major breach of the whatever rules that they have while they're doing the investigation.

So they fined them 50 million pounds, which is pretty high compared to, you know, what normally you'd get fined for this sort of thing. But to answer Andy's question, is it still a milk money fine? I might have had a little bit of wine. So let's do – I wrote this after having a couple drinks.

Let's do some fuzzy math since I can't be bothered to convert pounds to dollars or to be scientifically exact. I had about five minutes to get my kid to bed, had my glass of wine. According to MacroTrends, Facebook's net worth as of October 19th, 2021, is $958.58 billion. Let's go ahead and round that down, $958 billion, divide by $50 million, giving us $19,160.

So $1,19,160 of Facebook's net worth was the fine. According to NerdWallet, the most recent report released in September 2020 with data collected in 2019, the overall mean or average net worth of U.S. households is $748,800.

So what's one – what's one – what's one – what's one – what's one 19,160th of $748,000? Thirty-nine bucks. Facebook had to pay up the equivalent of $39. For the USDA, as of September 2021, U.S. simple average prices are $3.68 per gallon for conventional whole milk, $65 for conventional reduced fat 2%, or $4.12 per half-gallon organic whole milk,

and $4.12 per half-gallon organic reduced fat 2% milk. So roughly, approximately 10 gallons of milk. That's their fine. It was a milk money fine. Yep, exactly. Brian, that is the most impressive thing you've done in eight and a half years on this show. I did my research.

I am proud of you. I am very proud of you. Thank you. Excellent. Thank you. Excellent. Thank you so much. That is some excellent journalism. So, Andy, yes, it is a milk money fine. Now, Brian, I want you to convert that to coffee creamer fine. Ah, fuck you. I'm tired.

It's the most math I've done since fucking high school. Oh, God. All right. So, in additional Facebook news, the Facebook papers, as they're being called, a vast trove of documents supplied by the whistleblower Francis Haugen to a consortium of news organizations, has been released to the general pop, and people have lost their minds over this and predicted the fall and demise of Facebook, and, oh, boy, this is so horrible, and pretending that, like, we didn't already know all this sort of stuff.

Remember the Panama Papers? Remember how that was going to change stuff? Oh, yeah. Facebook papers is going to do just about as much. So, all the different outlets have kind of focused on different things. New York Times is reporting that Facebook's internal research was well aware that like and share functions have accelerated the spread of hate speech.

They have a document entitled, What is Collateral Damage? And it says that Facebook's failure to remedy these issues will see the company actively, if not necessarily consciously, I would argue, yes, consciously, promoting these types of activities. Facebook, of course, has said that these statements are based on incorrect premises, and it would be illogical for the company to try and actively harm its users, except for when it actually makes them money and keeps them engaged.

Right? Yeah. Right. We all know that. Nicotine cigarettes actively harm their users, but that didn't stop William Morris. Yep. And Bloomberg focused on the collapse in Facebook's engagement metrics, basically pointing out that they're shedding young users left, right, and center, but people are creating multiple accounts.

So, advertising metrics are completely bullshit. They're being sent to everybody, and Facebook says they're doing their best, basically. I'm so sick of that. We notified advertisers of the risk that purchases will reach duplicate accounts in its help center. And I don't know if you've ever tried to use the help center in Facebook.

That is a colossal shithole. Yeah. Oh, yeah. So, there you go. Facebook papers are out, and oh, boy. Yeah, Facebook sucks. Shocking. Here's the thing. I'm starting to think Frances Haugen, because she's on a European tour now. I think she's touring with the Stones across Europe, you know, waving the anti-Facebook flag.

I'm starting to think she's a Facebook plant, because this is what happened with Donald Trump here in the United States. It's terrible. It's terrible. Donald's horrible. Donald's horrible. Don't vote for him. Don't vote for him. Ah, fuck. We got four years of the asshole. You're skipping ahead to my end bit here.

Oh, sorry. It's okay. Okay. I didn't see the end bit. Ah. I have to scroll. Well, Brad, why don't you just get us to that? Should I just get to it? And then you can circle back and do the other shitty Facebook story now or just to hell with them. Skip to the end. All right.

So my thought here is it's all starting to feel like John Oliver's bit. We got him this time. Remember that? About Trump throughout his whole presidency. Every time something illegal or horrific was unearthed, documented, and bathed in plain daylight, and yet nothing happened. We never got him this time.

And we're not going to get him this time. You can scream, we got Facebook this time all you want. Nothing's going to happen. Facebook stock took a brief hit, but it's back up a percentage point as of yesterday, and it's still up 22% for the entire year to date. And one can argue that Facebook has had shitty publicity and horrible things have come out about Facebook all fucking year.

Yeah. Up 22%. Exactly. You know, that's the thing about it. It's like that's what I said. Frances Haugen is probably a plant from Facebook because they read the playbook from Trump, and she probably got stock options to go out there and bang the drum and said Facebook's terrible. Get them in the news. They're in the news.

People are going to want to buy because they think it's going to go down or whatever. I don't know. It's a mess. It is a total mess. By the way, it's all the dirty laundry is being aired now, too. Like, there probably aren't any more terrible secrets to hide. There can't be much worse than what we're hearing.

So, okay, stock price goes up. People eventually forget about this. Facebook has ditched all their bad stories. It's gone now. Done. Yeah. We know they're guilty of genocide. So, how much worse can you get?

Okay, we know. This is how bad society has gotten right now. Oh, this company is guilty of genocide. Good time to buy the stock. Exactly. Okay. We've got human trafficking. That's two and a half points up. We've got teen suicide. We'll give them a half a point on that one.

And, yeah, it just keeps going up and up and up. And, you know, these other stories don't even matter anymore. Facebook agrees to pay French publishers for news reuse, which is part of a billion-dollar pot that they already had to pay out anyway because the EU said that they had to, you know, spend money on journalism.

Go figure. Facebook's oversight board is bitching and moaning, saying, oh, well, we can't do our job because Facebook is holding back data. You think that they were going to give you everything? No. Take your checks. Shut up and do whatever you're going to do. You are a useless body that has no bearing whatsoever on how Facebook is going to conduct their business.

It was the initial mea culpa they threw up. Facebook was hoping, oh, look, we have an oversight board now. Leave us alone. Yeah, I wish I was on that oversight board because you just didn't pay for nothing. Me too. I'd be collecting that check. Yeah, I think they get, what, like $275,000 a year each? Fuck yeah, I'll be on that.

Amazing. Mm-hmm. Anyway, so Snap went down this week pretty heavily. They went down by 25% because of the Apple privacy changes. So, of course, I immediately bought two shares of Snap. Hoping that will go back up. You snapped up some Snap? Yep. I snapped up some Snap.

I had a few bucks sitting around in my E-Trade account. So, I'm like, oh, bye. So, it hasn't gone back up yet. But that's just a throw in the bucket and see what happens. Yeah. And then we come back to Trump. Trump to launch his own social media platform, calling it Truth Social.

And so many things have happened with this over the past week. I have to be honest about it. The way I found out that he had even was going to launch Truth Social was I found out that it had gotten hacked before it even launched. It got hacked before it even launched. It's using code from Mastodon that they're getting dinged down the name.

It's just a Mastodon clone. Yep. It's a Mastodon clone. And they physically tried. Not physically. But, yeah, I guess physically they typed it. Tried to hide all of the instances for Mastodon inside the source code because they broke the terms of service for open source software with Mastodon saying that, yeah, you're supposed to pay your code forward.

They tried to hide it, which never works in open source. By the way, I don't remember who did it, and I'm so sorry about this, but somebody made the best fucking joke on our Discord server, and I don't think it got the love it should have gotten. And, again, I apologize. I don't remember your name, but big shout out to whoever said, I guess they don't really own the libs this time, as in libraries.

Very fucking funny. Very fucking funny. I was crying. Yeah. Oh, God, that was so funny. Well played. Well played. Well played. Sorry we didn't put a hat tip in here for you. We'll catch you on the flip side, but that was funny as shit. Oh, God. Yeah. So, is what it is.

Yep. And his back is up like a gazillion dollars because, of course. See, that's the funny thing. I think a lot of this stuff that is coming out about, like this next story where Twitter own research shows that it's a megaphone for the right. You know, the right has been, they're against us, they're against us, they're against us.

If you shout it enough and you shout it loud enough, people believe it. That's what it comes down to. So, you know, everybody's saying that Facebook used, or Facebook was used in the January 6th attack on the Capitol. And, you know, it's a terrible thing. Most people think that.

The people on the right are thinking, hey, that's actually a good thing. Let's get back on Facebook because it obviously worked. So, let's just come on in. Start those groups up. It's a fucked up world, man. Especially now that WeWork is public, too. Yeah.

Yeah. They used a SPAC to get public. I had an investment in the SPAC that they were going to use, and I dumped it because I didn't know if it was going to actually come to fruition or not. And it turns out they used a different one than I had money in, but I made like $12 on it.

So, I guess I won. Thanks, WeWork. Yeah. I mean, it's been really funny listening to Scott Galloway talk about WeWork because he's kind of bullish on it. He sees the need for a company like that. He likes the new CEO a lot, you know. But then he'll turn around and go, but they're still losing money left, right, and center.

It's still a horrible investment. Maybe someday it'll be a good one. And, you know, Adam Neumann has basically committed the crime of the century. Like, he has walked away from a company that did nothing but lose gazillions of dollars, and he's walked away with well over a billion dollars from them for doing nothing except running a company into the ground.

He's an inspiration to millennials everywhere. Come on. You won't believe what happened this week. So, the funny thing is about Scott Galloway, I'm like, you know, I still have a love-hate relationship with the guy. And he's always talking about how sexy he is and all this shit on Pivot.

And, unfortunately, today, he shat on Dune. He didn't like the Dune movie. Neither did Kara, but I don't care what Kara thinks anyway. She didn't say it was interesting? No, she hated it. Because all she ever does is say things are interesting. This is the one thing she had a fucking opinion on, believe it or not. She doesn't have an opinion on anything else, but she had an opinion on Dune.

I saw Scott Galloway on a clip with Anderson Cooper, and, you know, the words were good, but, man, he looked like hammered shit. I'm like, okay, bro. He likes his tequila. Might want to spruce up a little bit for, you know, the coop.

Maybe smile once or twice, but wow. He inked his deal with CNN. He doesn't care anymore.

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Brian, Invasion dropped on Apple TV+. Did you get a chance to watch it? Nope. Don't. Okay, I wasn't going to. Just even from the key art, I was like, nah. The one thing that did not invade in this show were screenwriters. It's fucking terrible.

It is so slow. The characters are 1,000% unlikable. I did two episodes and like five minutes into the third because they did the three and, you know, release drop. Yeah. Man, it's bad. There's no likable characters in here.

It's just like, ugh. And I think Gabriel Pagan posted a review on Variety or Vanity, one of the two, on our Discord channel and I read it. And I'm like, the review was almost as boring as the show, but they agreed with me that it was a terrible show.

It is so not worth a watch. I thought I was going to see Ron D. Moore's name pop up at the end. Thanks to you, I started watching Star Trek Lower Decks Season 2. Right. It's fucking funny. I told you it got a lot better. They saved that show. They really saved that show.

You know how they saved the show? They saved the show by completely leaning in and saying, fuck it. We only care about people that are super Star Trek fans. We're not going to try to make something that's kind of funny but open to everybody. They went deep. Yes. Yes. And episode two, they got a new guy down in the Lower Decks or whatever, and the black dude, the big buff black dude.

And I couldn't place his voice. So I started to do a search to find his voice. It's not who I thought it was going to be. But then I came across this article on denofgeek.com where Lower Decks Season 2, Episode 2, Easter eggs and references. Holy shit.

These guys went deep. They went so deep. It is ridiculous. I caught a lot of references in it, but I'm not even – I got maybe 5%, and I thought I was doing good. It is so worth checking out. If you're watching Lower Decks, check the link in the show notes for this article because it is like – they put so much stuff in here.

But, yeah, they totally went to the Star Trek nerd. That's why I love it. You've got a lot to look forward to, Jason, because I felt it just got better as the season went along. Yeah, I finished Episode 5 last night, and I'm just loving it. But I swear to God, the Riker bit on the – was it the Triton?

Yeah. Where they're – I mean, I was in tears. I was laughing my ass off. I'm just like, that is the Rikerest Riker I've ever Rikered. It was so good. Yeah, it was good. I'm really happy that that show was saved.

Yep, it was. Skip Season 1, though. Just going to tell you. Season 1 is not so good. Season 2, great. I am caught up with Foundation. I will stand by – it's a pretty decent sci-fi show. It certainly looks great, and it certainly sounds great. Oh, boy.

It is fucking not even close to Foundation anymore, though. So off the rails. You know, fistfights, battles, none of this stuff had happened to Foundation. Yeah. Well, I mean, obviously, it must have because people kept on being there.

But it wasn't written about, and it wasn't in the story. So, yeah, it's off the rails. It is what it is, and I'm enjoying it for what it is. I'm definitely going to finish out the first season, but I don't know if I'll come back. We'll see. I don't know. Yeah, see how they ended. Change the name.

Yeah, I didn't watch this week's episode because I was busy watching that shitty Invasion show, so I've got some in the queue to check out. Yeah. But, yeah, it's okay. I mean, I'm not going to stop. I'll watch it. Yeah, and a sci-fi show I reviewed the first time it came out in Season 1, which was not that good, Another Life, which, you know, Katie Sackhoff's Netflix, let's throw her in a spacesuit thing.

Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah, the first season wasn't that great. The second season has dropped, and stunt casting might suck me into this one because they've definitely done some stunt casting. They know their audience or their potential audience. Katie is reunited with Battlestar Galactica alumni Rika Sharma and Kate Vernon, who are two of the final five Cylons.

They are pivotal characters, apparently, in another Life Season 2, so we'll see. Okay. I couldn't believe that that thing got picked up for another season. Me either. That was so bad. That first season was really terrible. Oh, man, speaking of terrible, the ID10T podcast with Chris Hardwick, formerly the Nerdist podcast, this guy, I mean, he married Patty Hearst's daughter, Lydia Hearst.

He lives in a different world than the rest of us. I mean, beyond reality, you know? Right. They go hang out. His friends go hang out at the Hearst Castle, which, you know, you can't even – you're not even allowed to take pictures at, and he's posting an Instagram of them, like, you know, swimming in the pool and stuff like that. And that was a couple years ago, and it's just gotten worse.

Okay. Danny Elfman was on this latest one, and hearing them talk about their, like, super ding-dong art collections and, you know, prop collections and things like that is just like, yeah, guys. Save that for when you're smoking cigars in your gold-plated rooms where the plebs aren't around.

What are they trying to do? Like the nerds version of the Kardashians? Pretty – not even, man. This is – it's really hard to listen to. And I even remember Burt Kreischer went on his show once, and he was saying that he was just not grounded in reality.

He's just like, why – you know, you have kids. Why do you keep going on tour? He's like, well, because I have to make money. He's like, yeah, but don't you want to spend more time with your kids? He's like, yeah, but I have to make money. And he's like, oh, you don't need to do – he's like completely, you know, disassociated with money because he has so much of it now.

It's ridiculous. And so it dehumanizes the interviews for me. So I love Danny Elfman, and I was really excited to hear this interview. And it's just like these little bits kept coming in where Chris is just so disassociated from how normal people are anymore. It's just not even worth listening, you know?

Right. It's like – and I know he doesn't need the money. Oh, here's the other thing that really fucking pisses me off. They bought this beautiful Spanish house, this historic Spanish house, made this like giant podcast studio. It's got like a TARDIS for a door you go in.

It is the worst sounding podcast studio I've ever heard in my life. It just sounds like shit. I'm like, you're going to spend that much money for a podcast studio, a legit podcast studio where you're supposed to be making good shows, and it sounds like you're in the fucking bat cave.

Get a – Jesus, I just want to smack him for that. I'm like, buy some fucking foam. Anyway, my love affair with Chris Hardwick is now over. Okay. Well, I also found a new podcast that doesn't sound that great, but, you know, they're punks, and it makes sense, and they're probably doing it very cheaply.

It's called Curious Creatures, and you'll understand why in a second. Curious Creatures is hosted by Lowell Tollhurst and Budgie. Lowell is the co-founder of The Cure, and Budgie was the drummer for Suzy and the Banshees, The Slits, big in Japan, and co-founder of The Creatures, hence The Cure as Creatures. You know, these are formative bands of my youth, things I was really interested in.

It's fun to listen to them talk about the time period. They're going to interview a lot of other musicians from that time period. You know, it's just – there's nothing groundbreaking here. They're being very careful not to offend or piss off anybody because I know that there's bad blood between Lowell and Robert Smith of The Cure.

You know, he was – Lowell was kicked out, basically, because he was a raging alcoholic and couldn't play his instruments. He's since, you know, sobered up and has a bit of a career for himself going. But, you know, so you're not going to get a lot of gossip and bad blood or anything, which is the stories I'd really like to hear. But it's just great hearing them talk about the old times.

So if you're a fan of that period of time in the music world and were into bands, alternative bands from the 80s, this is a good podcast for you to listen to. Ups and doodads! Brian, the iPod is 20 years old.

Can you believe it? Nope. I can't either. I was going through my photo library trying to find a picture of my first iPod, and I couldn't actually find one. But I remember buying it in downtown Chicago, taking it home, and loading up with my thousand songs in my pocket. And I had that thing forever.

That was the best. I was about to say, so that means about 20 years ago was the last time I really enjoyed listening to music on my phone or at least in a portable device. Yeah. Yeah. No, that click wheel, man, that was the best. I even, I had it for a long time, and then it swelled so bad that I'm like, this is a fire hazard.

I need to recycle this thing. It was so bad. But yeah, 20 years. Jesus, I was 30. 30 years old when I got the first iPad. And I thought I was old then. I had so much to learn. And this week, I did load my entire Apple Music Library onto my phone.

And I had like 160 gig. Fantastic. Didn't take that long. It's taking forever for Apple Music to actually upload my library to the cloud, which it seems to work now. So I don't know what happened before, but now it is actually like 10,000 songs in uploading everything to Apple Music.

So who knows? Maybe the dreaded, you know, staring at the sea problem will finally go away because it seems to be working now. I don't know. But the great part about it is once I uploaded my entire thing, I still had 800 gigabytes left on my phone. Like, how fucking crazy is that?

I remember buying a 10 megabyte hard drive and it was expensive. We all do. Yes, we do. And I thought this one was really funny. I talked to, it was Johannes on Twitter about this one, I believe. He's the first one that sent me this. Uh, the AI Oracle of Delphi uses the problems of Reddit to offer dubious moral advice.

So this is an AI trained on questions from Reddit. And, uh, so I, I popped it up. It's, uh, the link is in the show notes for ask Delphi. So of course I tried to trick it. So the first thing I put in was, um, sleep with my sister and Delphi, Delphi speculated that it's wrong.

So I said, sleep with my sister if she's drunk. And it said, it's okay. So I'm like, okay, we'll sleep with, it might not know the difference between sex and sleep with. So I said, let's, let's, let's, let's go down this, uh, road a little more. I said, have sex with my sister.

And it said, it's wrong. Then I went along with, have sex with my sister if she's drunk. It's okay. Thank you, Reddit for, for, uh, giving us the, uh, the new, uh, AI of the future. Yes. Well, I'm speaking of questions, Virginia, uh, YouTube has announced that it will begin demonetizing low quality kids videos next month.

So, uh, yeah, I don't know exactly how they're defining low quality. I was going to say, can you define low quality? Is this low bit rate or is, uh, they're saying channels that primarily target young people or market themselves as made for kids. If the content they upload is of low quality by YouTube's definition, that can include overly commercial videos.

Uh, so I wonder if that means all the unboxing videos are going to go away or at least be demonetized. And ones that encourage bad behaviors. Per the new guidelines, YouTube warns those videos may see limited or no ads. And they say that, uh, violating its new content guidelines could lead to removal from the YouTube partner program.

So good steps, five years, 10 years too late. Yeah. Yeah. Demonetize is the word of the day. Well, you know, uh, that's going to work better than anything else. It's better than playing whack-a-mole. If you just, uh, instead of trying to kick them off and having them come back, you just have, have that AI may say, you can't make any money off these.

That'll take care of it. Yeah. Cause that's the only reason they upload it. They're not doing it for fun. Shits and giggles. Security. Ha! We are back again with Dave Bittner, the host of the Cyber Wire podcast, co-host of the social engineering podcast, Hacking Humans with Joe Kerrigan, co-host of Caveat with Ben Yellen, where they discuss law and policy and surveillance and privacy.

And finally, he's the co-host of Recorded Future, where he takes you inside the world of cyber threat intelligence. Welcome, Dave. Hello. Good to be back. How's everybody doing? Quite excellent. Yeah. Good. Good. So I didn't really have any Star Wars news, but I thought this was pretty fun.

I listened to KUSC down here in Southern California, and it's a classical station. And they play a lot of Star Wars and Star Trek music on there. There was actually a bit where Patrick Stewart was like Instagramming that he was listening to KUSC from his dressing room, and the next gen theme came on.

And it was pretty funny because then I saw the Instagram and the next morning, I listened to KUSC and they're like, this is for Patrick Stewart. Here you go. Thanks for listening. Celebrity requests. Yeah. So I'm listening this morning. This woman, she's like, my dad turned 62 today.

Can you play him some Star Wars music? Because he loves Star Wars music. So they played the Empire theme from Rogue One. Wow. And I was listening to that. I actually, this is one of those weird times where I sat in the car and I listened to the whole thing. And I'm like, damn, I want to go watch Rogue One again. It was really good. Yeah. I'm not sure I could hum the Empire theme from Rogue One.

Is it reminiscent of the Empire, the Imperial March? Yes, it is. It's very, it's in the same vein. It sounds exactly like, as soon as you hear it, you're like, oh, that's Empire music, my friend. But it's obviously a little different from John Williams, but it is Empire-esque. The single best use of the Empire theme comes in the Lego Star Wars series, in which Darth Vader, or no, I'm sorry, not Darth Vader, the Emperor holds a boombox over his head that is playing the theme.

Oh, no. Say anything style? It is amazing. Oh, okay. That's funny. Yeah, I like Rogue One. I think Rogue One is a solid Star Wars movie. It really is. It really is.

Yeah. So I got my shipping notice. The MacBook Pro arrives today. So if I go dead silent in the middle of this, either I've had a heart attack or I've had to run to the door to catch the UPS guy. I think it's cute how many people are super excited about a computer again.

I haven't felt that way in years. I know. I haven't either. This is the first computer that I think I've really felt excited about probably in a couple of decades. And I think it's great that computers are fun in this way again, that it's not just an evolutionary march forward of, oh, Intel's processors are 5% faster and one more core.

It's like, no, there's actual innovation here and new things to think about and consider new ways to think about things like RAM. And so I think it's pretty exciting. And the ports, they pay off. Well, yeah, the ports, but they are legitimately really, really high performance machines.

I was looking at the benchmarks yesterday and I was getting giddy. I was definitely getting giddy and yeah, you know, you talk about innovation and in the processors and the chips and everything. And it's a combination of the death of Johnny Ive and the, you know, that let's, let's go back to the way things were because they worked.

Let's get rid of that stupid touch bar and bring back function keys and let's, you know, make it a little thicker, make it a little heavier and put some ports back in because everybody wanted them and MagSafe. Yee-hoo. So, you know, I'll give up one Thunderbolt. A machine, a pro machine. Yeah.

I'll give up one Thunderbolt port for power and an HDMI cable because right there, that's two Thunderbolt ports that you would normally have to use, you know? Right. So, yeah, it's, you know, two steps backwards to go three steps forwards. I love it. Mm-hmm. Yeah.

And I suspect there's a lot of pent up demand here for these machines. So, it's going to be interesting to see when you combine that with ongoing supply chain issues, what the back order time is if you custom order one of these. I don't know. I'm also curious. Late December right now. Yeah.

I'm also curious to see what models the Apple stores are going to keep in stock. What variety will they have? Yeah. What are the standard configurations that you can just walk in and buy? Because that's a thing, too. Like, if somebody's MacBook Pro goes down and they need to replace it today, you know, what options are available there?

Yeah, definitely. Although, I don't think they're going to keep these things in stock. I really don't. Yeah. Yeah. Because it's just, I mean, look at the back orders. Yeah, look at the back orders already. It's like, as soon as these things are at the shelves. You would like a MacBook Pro? Can I interest you in this iPad? Yeah.

Right. It's still got an M1, sort of. Mm-hmm. So, yeah, I did all my backups last night. I actually installed Monterey on my Air, my M1 Air, to see how it would work. Because the computer that I'm moving from is Big Sur.

So, I had to get all that backed up. Because, you know, time machine backups are the way to go to a new machine, always. Best way. Right. And so, I got all that stuff rolling. And then, so, I did the Air to Monterey, updated all my software. This is, I think, the first time where every single bit of audio software in my chain just works on a new Mac OS.

I mean, everything worked. I could not believe it. You know, all the iZotope plugins work. Obviously, Logic works like a champ. Yeah. Ophonic is running in Rosetta, but good enough. So, between all of those things, I can actually switch to Monterey and not have to freak out.

It's amazing. I love it. I got sent – I was helping a friend out converting some video files earlier in the week. And they sent me some files that was a – it was a strange format I wasn't really that familiar with. And I was like, oh, what am I going to use to convert this?

And I thought, oh, Handbrake. Handbrake will take anything. Yep. So, I loaded it into Handbrake and converted it. And I think it may have been the first time that I had something running that pegged all eight processors and just – and took a hold of everything. And it was – and again, I'm just running the standard M1 Mac Mini here.

But it was past just really fast how it tore through that. So, again, I continue to be impressed and these new machines are supposed to be even better. So, I have put in my request for a replacement laptop.

I doubt it will happen until we start traveling again because, honestly, I rarely use my laptop. But when I need it, I need it. Right. Yeah. Yeah. I'm really looking forward to hearing what you have to say about it, Jason. Because, obviously, your use case exactly mirrors ours.

And I'd love to know what you think for our editor's sake. I'm sure it's what they're going to have. So, really looking forward to you putting it through its paces. And I got to tell you, if anybody's using iZotope RX9 Pro or Advanced – sorry, RX9 Advanced upgrade from 8 if you had it, 9 is probably about 50% faster.

And it sounds better. And it was like a $200 upgrade from 8. So, I jumped on that immediately. Yeah. The new version of iZotope RX9 is just awesome. So. All right. I'll pass that along as well. Yes, please do. All right. Shall we get into – oh, no.

We don't even have any security news. What you got for us, Dave? Well, in a fit of frustration, I put something out in the world today. And I will – I'll leave a link to the Twitter post that I made. Why don't – Jason, would you want to describe this for me? From a real estate side, I think it's pretty funny.

This is the most click-baity house for sale sign that I've ever seen. It is pretty awesome. Mind-blowing attic secret. The builder did what? With a great graphic. Yeah, there's a woman with a surprised face. So, basically, it's every – what I did was I pondered what would happen if realtors started adopting the tactics that YouTubers use to – for clickbait.

The idea being that it's only a matter of time. Because this works and it works so well, it's only a matter of time before realtors hop on this bandwagon and we start seeing real estate signs like the one I posted. Well, you know I live with a real estate broker, right, who has homes for sale. Yes. So, I do believe I may be having some fun pretty soon.

Right, right. You go in her stash of signs and just insert one randomly. No, no, no. She would totally be on board. We're like, you wouldn't believe what happened in this pool last summer. It would be interesting to run some tests and see if it actually works or not.

Yeah. Please don't. You're right. Well, that's the frustrating thing. It does work. Yes. It is the lowest common denominator. And so, I'm including a link here. The thing that put me over the top on this was a YouTube video. What frustrates me most is when YouTubers who I like and respect and whose content I enjoy, when they do this as well.

And specifically, I'm thinking of Rick Beato. Who is too old for this shit. Yes, yes, yes, exactly. But he is following the YouTuber clickbait playbook. And I also think he's too successful for this shit.

I think there comes a point when you've grown your channel, you've reached – you're at the pinnacle. You're one of the top people doing what you can do. Knock it off. He has a preview frame. It's a picture of him with a very concerned face and it's titled, Adele, I can't believe this.

And it says, I can't believe Adele did this again. And so, you look at this and you go, oh, my God, what did Adele do? What did she – oh, I don't believe – you know. So, you've got all of this – it triggers all those things in your head like concern. Like, oh, no, what's wrong with Adele? No, you watch it. It's like, oh, I can't believe Adele made such a great song.

This is awesome. Exactly. Yes, I can believe it because she kind of has a history of doing it every time she puts herself in a studio. Right. So, the preview has nothing to do with the content at all. All it's doing is there to trigger your emotions, which it does successfully.

But, boy, I hate this. I cannot wait to write the social media's update for Security Ha this week. I can't believe Bittner did it again. Right, right, right, right.

You won't believe what Jason bought this time. Right. Oh, they will. Yeah, that's not going to work. Yeah, actually. Yeah. Yeah. One weird trick. Frustrating. Yeah. So, I saw this one. Anyway, off my soapbox. Yeah.

This is vaguely security related, but I just – the irony I practically choked on. You won't believe what I choked on again. Facebook sues programmer who allegedly scraped data for 178 million users. So, according to the record, Facebook has sued the Ukraine national, Alexander Solachenko, for allegedly scraping data for more than 178 million users.

He exploited Messenger's contact import feature by using an automated tool that mimicked Android devices. He then fed in millions of phone numbers and gathered data whenever the site returned info and then turned around and sold it on the black market. Clever hack, by the way. Yeah, clever hack.

Clever hack. And Facebook tracked him down after he used his forum username and contact deals, details for email and board jobs. So, they were able to find him. And, yes, it was a clever hack. What else was a clever hack? Maybe how Zuckerberg started fucking Facebook.

Lest we forget that FaceMash, the precursor to Facebook, relied entirely on Zuckerberg scraping university servers for photos of students. Hmm. Interesting. If only the universities had sued him back then, we wouldn't be in this shithole. Oh, but, Brian, but, Brian, I'm sure back then the university servers didn't have the terms of agreement that prohibited that.

So, it was fair game. I mean, this guy from Ukraine is obviously violating Facebook's terms of services, and we can't have that. We can never have that. God forbid somebody break a law with Facebook. Yeah. I wonder – I don't know. I have seen this story.

I haven't dug into the actual lawsuit itself. I wonder what are they going after him for? How are they assigning any sort of monetary value to this, or is this basically just a knock it off, shot across the bow, and, hey, all you other people trying to scrape our publicly facing data, stop it as well.

Or do a better job of hiding yourself after the fact. Yeah, basically. You're going to sell it on the dark web. Come on. Anonymize, bro. Yeah. Get it in Bitcoin like everybody else. Yeah. Yeah. Well, I got to say, it has not been a good week for Facebook, and I'm okay with that.

Yeah. You'll get the stock price is up. Exactly. Nothing matters. Doesn't matter at all. But prepare for the metaverse. No, thanks. Oh, boy. No, thanks. All right. What else we got? Let's see.

Well, I didn't put this in here, so I don't know why we're pausing. I thought this was you, Jason. Okay. Well, there we have it. This comes from Jerry. Hello from a fellow geek slash freaker in the SFV. That would be San Fernando Valley for you non-locals. Please rip this story to shreds.

Love the show. This is actually a story we did rip to shreds, but our scathing retort apparently had no effect on them moving forward into the world. That is precisely what I was going to say. I did not put this story in here because I put this story in our notes about six weeks ago.

Yes. Yes. This was before they actually came to market because Sam Altman's WorldCoin wants to scan people's eyes to start up a whole UBI type of thing, and yeah, a lot of people have done it so far, apparently.

100,000 people globally, which probably isn't hard because he put in globally. Anybody with a brain and a computer beforehand would probably be like, you want me to do what? But, you know, it depends on where you go in the world. The people are like, hey, we're going to start giving you cryptocurrency.

So they, A, ka-ching, they hear cryptocurrency. B, all you got to do is look, look in the glass, look in the glass. Thank you very much for your soul. We're going to move on here. Here's a little card with your token. Bye-bye. I love the idea of someone coming up with an actual soul extractor and grabbing people walking down the street and saying, in exchange for some random cryptocurrency, can we have your soul?

It's like that old episode of The Simpsons with Milhouse where he sold his soul. I'm not using it. Sure. Right. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. So we've got a couple of links in here about it, but people are doing it. So why?

Yeah. Yeah. We already ripped it to shreds long, long ago, but it turns out people are dumber than we thought, Brian. Are they? I know it's hard. It's hard to believe. It really is. Are they? Not really. I don't know. I'm pretty low expected. I've got a low bar these days, Jason.

How many people are on Facebook? Come on. That's all we got to do. That's all we have to triangulate there. I don't believe how low my bar is.

I threw this in because it was just kind of like, yeah, we knew this was coming. Russia is censoring the internet with coercion and, wait for it, black boxes. Don't they also have a kill switch, Russia? They've basically got a switch where they shut off the entire outside internet, don't they?

I'm guessing it finally works now. It was just speculation before he was trying to build it, but I'm guessing it probably works now. Yeah. People in the policy world sometimes refer to this as the splinternet. Yes, yes. Of course, China is most famous for it, but Russia as well, using it to control things.

Yeah, I think it's going to be interesting as we have more systems like, what's the Elon Musk satellite internet service? Starlink. Yeah, similarly to the way that people could get TV from outside of their nations by aiming an antenna at the sky, we're going to hit that with internet as well.

So it could be a good, a potential workaround for people. I suppose you'll have to hide the dish if people come, if the police, the secret police come around looking for them, but, you know, there's always workarounds, right? Yeah. Yeah, I'm wondering if there's a way to open source the dish so they can get it without having to have it mailed to them, because that's kind of a problem right now.

It's not really a small box that comes to Starlink subscribers, but it would be interesting if they would, you know, have something, have a program available for people to go to Radio Shacksky in Moscow and pick up the parts to build their own dish.

Right. Yeah, those dishes are pretty sophisticated, is my understanding, so I don't think it's that easy. The problem with going to Radio Shacksky is they ask for your address and you're screwed then, you know?

Yes. Oh, true. They got to take the address, the email, the phone number, and then you can finally buy the box. Well, we do have a problem here. It's true. Well, we haven't solved the world's internet problems today, guys.

I'm sorry. But it would be interesting if they do come up with a way to get around it, because there will be internet in the sky very soon. I mean, maybe Project Loon can make a comeback since that has been mothballed. Maybe somebody can buy it for cheap. But yeah, they're basically just, you know, pulling a china.

Yeah. Yeah. And I think we're going to see more of this as authoritarianism is growing around the world. I think this is just the kind of thing we're going to see more of, because it's an effective way to control your population. And it's not that hard to do.

The people who really want to work around it will find ways to do it. But for your general citizenry, this is a good way to control the message. So why not? Stops the Arab Spring from happening again. Yeah. Borscht Spring. It's funny.

I'd never realized how few people Russia actually has. There's only like 140 million people in Russia. Yeah. It's like two. I can't remember. It's either two or three percent of the world's economy. They have outsized influence for their size when it comes to economic engine and population and all that kind of stuff.

I guess that's what happens when you have- Comes with the nukes. Yep. Nukes. That's exactly what I was going to say. We all got it at the same time. It's like, ah, nukes. Yeah. Then you have the Soviet Union's former stockpile. When you talk, people listen. Yep. Speaking of talking and people listening, Dave, I heard you on Caveat this week.

And something you said really tickled my fancy. So I went, and now that I have my Elgato stream deck set up as my soundboard, I had to make this soundbite that I'm going to use probably on every show. I'll send you some money when I do use it because I thought this was the greatest soundbite ever.

Because we're legal like that. We are. Oh, boy. Here we go. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Let me just stop you here for a quick aside because I know we'll get letters. Which is the most Dave thing ever. Yes. I love it.

I love it. Yes. And there is a longer version for when you do have to explain yourself. I only go down this pathway. And you can tell I'm a little frustrated to even have to do it because lots of people are pedantic about it in the computer world.

And as I said, if I don't mention that, we'll get letters. I love the exasperation. It's so good. Yeah. That is definitely, that is me. That is the most me of me there could possibly be.

Oh, wait. No, there's a little bit. Dave, there's a little bit more of you. Yeah. Fuck you guys. Fuck you guys. Fuck both of you. Fuck both of you. Fuck you, Jason. Fuck you, Brian. Fuck you both. Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you. Okay, that is a little bit more Dave to be had.

That is the thing I suspect it will be around long after I am gone. After I have left this world, people will do internet searches and they will find that my great, great grandchildren will say, oh, you know, Grandpa Dave was a podcaster.

Let's go searching on the old internet archive and find a clip of him. And that's what's going to come up for sure. Well, if you die first, I'm going to go to your grave and I'll put a little motion activated box on top of it. So anytime somebody walks by, your ethereal voice will come out of the ground saying that.

Yeah. Deal. Deal. I'm up for that. I think we need to put some of our better ideas from this segment together here. I think we need to make stickers with codes, QR codes on it that point exactly to the sound bite and just start putting them everywhere. Right. Every restaurant.

Every place in the QR codes at, yeah, gas stations, all those places. People. Oh, challenge accepted. Oh, man. So now, so, but see, here's the thing. I'm the one who's going to get the cease and desist letter. And?

Yeah. I'll afford it to you. Not my problem. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know where that could have come from, your honor. No. No. I think it's a deep fake. Mm-hmm.

Yeah. There you go. There you go. It's my new out. To deep Dave. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. All right, guys. All righty. Thanks very much. See you later. Closing shout outs.

Over at Patreon, we've got Robert. Welcome, Robert. Yay. Yee. Yee. And over at PayPal, we've got yee. No. John, Tom, Joseph, Mark, Humphrey, Rubin, and Thomas. Thank you all so much. We appreciate it.

Thank you very much. Over at Stripe, we've got subs from Ashley G, Daryl W, Ross W, and Karen B. So, thank you guys so much for keeping the lights on. Thank you. We've actually got some iTunes reviews and ratings this time as well. Drew Bellis gives us one star. Too liberal.

Heard about this from Cyber Wire. Tried it, but too much liberal snark. If you're a liberal, you might really enjoy it, though. Guess we own those libs. Unlike Truth Social. Yeah, we do own the libs. Hey, you know what, though? That's the way to write a review. Yeah. It's not for me, but if you're this way, you might like it.

That's a nice review, even though he gave us one star. I don't care. Who cares about the star number? That was actually a well-thought-out review. So, thank you, Drew. Just saying. Admiral Jeff H. writes in with five stars. Always great and informative show. Y'all wanted to make sure it works.

Well, here it is. Yep. Admiral tested it for us, and we still get reviews. Sorry, I'm desperately trying to keep in my liberal snark. Oh, here it comes! Okay. And we got a five-star rating from Bob. Grumpy, informative, professional. Ha!

I love this podcast. I find the balance of Jason and Brian to be reminiscent of my relationship with my own best friend, and it's comforting to know I'm not alone in my grumpiness. If I had a shot of whiskey for every time Jason says exactly, and Brian says, mm-hmm, I'd be dead always. I love the show. I enjoy the insight and appreciation, and appreciate the quality in production.

Thanks for many great years of listening. Sorry it took so long to write this review. Perhaps, like self-driving cars, I moved the posts a few times. It happens. Thank you, Bob. Until next time, I'm Jason DeFilippo. And I'm liberal snark Schulmeister. Thanks for listening to grumpy old...

Mmm. Thanks for listening to grumpy old geeks. Exactly. If you enjoy the show, visit gog.show slash donate to help us keep the lights on, and we'll love you forever. You can also help us out by sharing the show with your friends and enemies. It's easy and absolutely free. Show notes for this episode are at gog.show slash 528.

From there, you can find links to everything we talked about in this episode, as well as links to our swag and Discord channel if you want to buy some stuff or chat with us and other show fans. You can also head over to gog.show slash contact and send us your feedback or questions that we can read on the air. And if you're so inclined, please head over to gog.show slash review and toss us a liberal snarky review and preferably five stars.

Stay liberal snarky. Yeah, fuck you guys. Fuck you guys. Fuck both of you. Fuck both of you. Fuck you, Jason. Fuck you, Brian. Fuck you both. Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you. I don't like to curse. You know, I generally don't. It's something I generally don't want to do.

Let me just say, without reservation, fuck you guys. Both of you. Fuck you guys. At QVC, fall shopping is more than just checking out. It's discovering the brands you love across beauty, fashion, home, and culinary, all in one place.

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