40: A Hot Bowl of Sharkfin Disruption Soup

Brian Schulmeister. Grumpy Old Geeks. Two old farts, a microphone, and the internet. What could go wrong?

Well, Happy New Year, Jason. Happy New Year, Brian. It's good to see you. Good to see you, too. In person, in Venice, with beer. In lovely Venice, California, and I'm having a stone-smoked porter. And I am drinking what is very appropriate for me, at least according to other people, Arrogant Bastard Ale.

That's what I hear. Yeah. How were your holidays? Good. Very, very cold, but good. I was in Toronto for 10 days from Christmas until just after New Year's. Didn't leave the house. Except to smoke. Yeah, you did. So you were at the bar the whole damn time.

Well, just to get to the bar. I ran into a heated car, was swiftly driven and dropped off in front of the bar, ran inside, and there I sat. No, it was a good time. I really love it there. It's always fun. We'll probably eventually end up living there at some point.

Excellent. So we can get into your rants about L.A. whenever you'd like. Yes, because I'm on vacation now here in lovely Los Angeles. Yes. Been here for a week. I got out just in time for the massive cold fest of 2014, I guess. It is bad. It is bad over there. Sorry, guys. Sucks. You know, we're not turning on the air conditioner in between segments to keep cool here. Nope, not at all. Not us.

Yeah, but here's the difference. Yeah, yeah, it's cold there, but when you're here, you're still stuck in Los Angeles. Well, yeah. I find that since I've been back here, because people are different all across the country. In the past six months, I've been traveling a lot. And people here are stupid with extreme prejudice, is what I found.

Yes, I don't disagree. Yes, they actively try and be stupid against you to make your life miserable or harm you in many certain ways. Yeah, it's a very different place. Well, I will say what I always say in defense of L.A. The dumbest, most annoying asshole from every fucking small town moves here.

It's not our fault. It's all you dumb fucks. Oh, oh, thank you. I've been to every small town, and maybe that's why I like it there now. Yeah, because all those jerks came here. They all come out, you know, they all come out with their dream and sit around here for five years annoying the hell out of all of us that live here.

And then they fuck off and leave when their dream didn't happen. Unless their dream was, of course, being a waiter. Or Chili's. Okay. So, there's this other thing that happened. I went to the grocery store the other day. Yes. And they asked me, would you like a bag? And I thought they were talking about those, you know, polyethylene, or the big plastic take-home bags that you could bring back.

Because they've been pimping those forever. Yes. And then when I said no, the girl at the end of the bagging station just looked at me blankly when I was done. Yes. And the girl behind the counter was just, like, looking at me like I had four heads. And I'm like, oh, you people did that stupid San Francisco shit, didn't you?

It's spreading, Jason. Get used to it. It's in Toronto already as well. It's coming into New York. It is going to be the norm everywhere. You're going to have to pay for your plastic environmentally destroying bags from now on. We always paid for them. It was just a markup. What the fuck? It's just like the airlines. They're going to be charging you for air next time around.

If you like air. If you'd like air, that'll be an extra $50 for your flight. Yeah, it always used to be built in as a markup. But then, you know, it's bullshit legislation that's caught on because, you know, it's like saying anything is for the kids. It's for the environment. So how are you going to say no to that? It's going to get passed. End of story.

It's dirty California hippie bullshit. You get really, really used to having bags in the back of your car and usually you can get them for free and then you just bring them in with you and you do your shopping that way and you feel self-entitled. No, here's the problem. If you have a dog, you used to take the bags home and you'd pick up the dog shit with it. Now you can't.

No, no. Now you're out on that. So dog owners are screwed. I'm not a fan of this. I am not a fan of this at all. It's fine. It's not that big of a deal. And that's not just a California thing. It started here. Well, most things do. Anti-smoking. Most things terrible start in California.

Yeah, most things terrible do start here. So tell me something about this Coachella thing that you've been ranting about. Well, I am a big fan of Coachella. At least I have been. I started going pretty much the second year. I've gone almost every year up until the last couple years because I'm old and it started to become a hipster, runover, horrible thing.

You know, once Lindsay Lohan starts to go, you can't go anymore. But I missed it. I decided to go again this year. They just did their announcement of the lineup, which is neither here nor there. Not crazy about it, but good enough. Well, I saw it. There's one band I want to see.

Just one band. There's one band. There are about 20 bands I'd like to see, but nobody that really blows me away. But I'm going anyways, and I was very excited about it until I got my email, my official Golden Voice announcement email, which in paragraph one states, and I quote, you totes need to go check out the brand new Coachella.com.

I want to fucking sell my tickets now just based on this email. I never want to have anything to do with Coachella again because I totes hate fucking totes. Because it's cray-cray-ridic. It's cray-cray-ridic, and I'm going to have a cray-cray-ridic time doing the molly with the kids. It's Coachella. What's the molly? That's their new term for X because they have to rename everything.

Oh, okay. Oh, what was the other one? Adorbs. Somebody said, I totes have an adorbs, baby. This chick had just had a new baby. She sent the email around to the company, totes adorbs, baby. Oh, God. What's happened to this world? Anyways, yeah.

So the totes should not be allowed in any kind of official press release. That's just... Totes. Totes. Unless it's coming from Snapchat, I suppose. Totes agrees. Oh, man. So, yeah. I do have to say it's nice being here. I should have worn shorts.

I am in shorts and a t-shirt, of course. And we will have to turn the air conditioning back on in a moment. It is getting warm. Sorry, guys. Yeah. I've had a love-hate relationship with L.A., and I've lived here all my life. So I totally get where you're coming from. There are a lot of annoying people here.

I find beer helps. Yeah, but you can only have so much beer. That's not true. There is a functional limit to how much beer you can... Oh, functional. You didn't mention that. Okay. So I do miss it back there.

I've got to say, people are nicer. It's great. The problem is the jobs are here. So I'm here. This trip is for about... This trip is for jobs. I came here to woo clients and get new business, because we talked about this before, like when I couldn't get a job.

Yeah. And I have come to terms with the fact that I will probably never again have a day job. That's the way it is. And when we started this, I was thinking about this on the way over as I was screaming at this asshole going 20 miles an hour on Topanga Canyon in front of me. Back in the early days, we were magicians.

We were wizards. We were like well-paid to do the magic shit on the internet. Yes. Now we're line cooks. Yeah. Fortunately, everybody's got to eat. Yeah. So we're still going to have jobs. We're going to have business. So I'm looking at it on the bright side with that. But you know what?

You got to go out and hump the pavement, as it were. You got to pimp your shit. Totes. Your totes got to pimp your shiznit. Speaking of pimping my shiznit, I was on Dan Benjamin's podcast a couple weeks ago. I listened the other night. Yeah. At least to your segment.

I have not listened to his entire podcast before. It seems they seem to know what they're talking about from the five minutes before and five minutes after. Well, it's actually been one of my ear candy recommendations back in the early days when it first started. I really like it. And Dan was posting on Twitter.

Dan Benjamin, the owner of the network, was posting on Twitter. He's like, hey, if we did a quick impromptu episode of the show, would anybody call in? And I'm like, hell yeah. So he sent me the number and I called in. Right. And we talked a little bit about podcasting. Yes. Because being the line cook that I am during the day, in the evening, I would like to be able to do this.

Talk to the peoples. You know? Spread the joy and the wisdom of my years in the business. Yeah. So I asked him, is it a viable option to do this full time? And now you tell me what you took from his advice.

What I took from his advice is, well, you started, he started off with kind of the basic, of course it's a viable. If you find an audience and you are interesting, if you build it, they will come. Field of Dreams bullshit. As you and I know from having done this almost a year now, they don't really come.

You have to go out into the streets, hit them over the head, drag them back to you, kicking and screaming, and then hope they stick around for the next episode or two. It's not that easy. As you started to get into it more and more with him, he started to kind of admit to that, that it's not, you know, building an audience is incredibly hard right now.

The problem is, like you just said, you know, you do your day job and at the end of the day, you'd like to sit and talk to the people and hopefully make money doing that. Well, so do 100,000 other people. 250,000 other people. 250,000 other people at last count.

And that's just the iTunes podcast list. A lot of people want to do that. Who wouldn't want to just sit around in their house and talk? You know, hopefully what I think, we do something actually interesting and we bring a wide variety of knowledge and a huge breadth to what we do as opposed to just sitting there and chatting.

But still, it's not easy. And you asked him a lot of very pointed questions that he had absolutely no answer for. Other than if you got in at the beginning, when there were only 150 podcasts and you were good, you have a big audience and you can make money.

If you're starting now? Get in with a network that has people and then they're going to, you know, amortize you across a bunch of other podcasts to get any kind of ad deal. But here's the one thing. I did think about that. And he did mention a bunch of other things, all of which we do and all of which don't work.

So I am wondering if getting in with a network works either. Yeah. Who knows? Who knows? And yeah, Hattie was saying, oh, and you know, do the social media thing and put your podcast in your email footer. I'm like, this is social media.

Social media will solve all your problems. If you're just on social media, everything will be great. You can do all your products on social media. Social media, social media, social media. She's pretty smart. Don't bag on her. Okay. I only heard that one segment. But yeah, but she, but like, that's one of those things where it's like, I tried to clarify at the beginning by saying I've been in this business for 20 years.

If I've been in this business for 20 years or a developer for 20 years, I know to put something in my damn email footer, you know, in my email signature. That's like, yeah. I was just like, give me a break. That is something I've run into a lot. In fact, I was talking to my business partner about some experiences she's having with something she's doing on the side.

And she has a, I guess I would say niece. I'm not sure. But, you know, a younger girl that is talking to her and is telling her how the entire reason her business is failing is she's not on Instagram. Okay.

Again, it's that social media. Like it's just, it's a fucking, it's, it's a gospel for kids of a certain age. And they just think that that is going to solve everything. And that is the answer to everything. And it's fucking not. Not even close. No, being on Instagram is basically a waste of time. It was like, I saw Tiesto, a superstar, massive, huge DJ went on to Snapchat and he must have gotten contacted by Snapchat and they must have made a deal with him.

And, you know, he signed up for Snapchat and he basically practically blew Snapchat servers last night because, you know, like a hundred thousand people sent him Snapchats. Is he ever going to look at them? Hell no. Do they do anything for his business? No. Probably not. I mean, that's an awareness campaign.

That's not an engagement. That's just, that's just, that's just awareness. That's all it is. And it's, it's not quantifiable. And none of that stuff is. So getting on Instagram isn't going to save your business, nor is it really going to do anything for your business. Nope. So at the end of the day, at the end of the segment, uh, we'll put the link to the show in the show notes.

And just a forewarning, I did have a lot of eggnog that night. So I am a little slow because he did, it was an impromptu thing. And I'm just like, no, you sounded okay. I mean, the, the auto quality was really good and you had some, you say to me, it felt like you were just sitting there going, are you really saying this to me?

Of course we tried that. Of course we've done that. Yeah, I kind of was. So, and I just listened to it and I was laughing going, yeah, you know what? Basically we're doing it because it's fun. I'm not expecting to make money. If we do, that's great. Chances are we probably won't.

There's just, there's just, it's signal noise. There's too many people out there. Okay, well, there's also, there's also a big difference from what we do and also what Dan does on most of his shows. We're talk shows. We're not advice shows. Yeah. We don't, we don't give a lot of quantifiable takeaways at the end of our shows.

Right. Except go have a beer and watch some TV and listen to a podcast or two. Yeah. There are shows that are highly successful like, you know, sex advice shows. There's advice, you know, there's something that you can learn from the shows. And when you're getting into the entertainment realm, you just got to be fucking entertaining.

And what he didn't, what he didn't mention was if you're not getting traction, maybe your show just sucks. That is a very real possibility. I, you know, if he would have said that, that would have been at least a little bit more honest and realistic. Um, because that's what I was thinking in the back of my head. I'm like, why don't you just say it, man? Say it. Say, maybe your show just sucks.

Which I don't think our show does, but I don't think it does either. You know, we, we've hit a, we've hit a certain limit of people and it grows slowly over time. We don't, we don't get any of the big bumps doing any of the cool things that he mentioned. Um, but we're doing it. People seem to like it and that's great.

I, it's a lot of the podcasts on iTunes seem to be dead. Some of them aren't even updating anymore. I mean, there's just so much out there and I think we will see a die off of people that just get fed up doing it. I mean, we see that like Corolla probably gets like five calls a week about like, I've got a podcast and a hundred people listen to it.

How do I grow it? And he basically just says, don't. And that's the other thing that that's what pisses me off about the iTunes store is we get shown up every week by podcasts that have not been updated in four or five years. That's because it's not, it's, it's not an editorial filter and there is no editorial filter really for podcasting out there yet.

That's the, that's what the function of the record label was in the music industry, which is also kind of gone away, which is why you have so many fucking shitty bands out there. Look at the Coachella list. Um, there's, there's no, there's no, there's no editorial filter for podcasting at all. iTunes throws up the newest things, um, new and noteworthy.

I don't even know if most popular is actually accurate or if they're just fucking around with people. I think that's a download algorithm based on, yeah, downloads, views, and considering if you're a podcaster yourself, iTunes won't give you any stats. You know, so it's, it's, it's just, um, you know, and it's a limited market as well.

Not that many people listen to podcasts. It is, you know, it's a, it's a specific group of people. Will it catch on? Well, you know, I'm surprised that like serious isn't like sniffing around and picking up podcasters and, and grabbing them to do talk show or talk stations or expand the number of stations that they have.

Cause God knows they can, um, all that stuff will start to have to happen and, and the cream of the crop will get picked out. And then it'll just go off to be what it is. And you'll, you'll, you'll, you'll pick, they'll pick out the superstars, put them on a different medium and then podcasting will be back where it started. Exactly.

That's, that's the way I see it going. So, okay. Actually, fortunately, now that I've said it out loud, I think that's completely wrong because I don't think serious is going to be around that much longer, but you know, I don't know. They're built into cars. That helps. I haven't listened to it in my car. I haven't found any decent stations.

The only station I found that I actually like is the comedy central station. So I can listen to standup while I'm driving. The standup stations are good. The music stations are a joke and they're completely against the promise of what they were supposed to be. Uh, they're as play listed, if not more so than terrestrial radio. So, Oh yeah.

Yeah. I had a buddy, uh, my buddy Jordan, he, he had a show on serious back in the day and, uh, it was, he, he talked about this on another show and he will be on our show when he's back in town. Um, where they would get people that would call in that were like getting, uh, they're like miners in Canada who couldn't get real radio stations.

Right. It's a really bizarre mix of people that, that show up on those things. So, um, I don't know. Either way, it was fun to be on the show. I'm still a huge fan of, of his show. He gives out great advice for people who want to change their jobs, people who have one career and they want to quit their job and start a good career.

Make the transition. Yeah. And he gives them, I've, I've, I've been through that process and I, so I listened to it and he actually gives solid advice. Cool. So, I mean, on the podcast thing, who knows? It's, it's, it's, it's a black art. I prefaced it all with, I basically only listened to that 10 minutes.

So yeah, definitely check out the show. It's good. But, uh, yeah, that was the most exciting thing besides my 300 stair challenge with David Teeter on Fitbit. Yes. I saw you went crazy with that. 310 flights of stairs in one day. And I never left a, uh, basically a 20 square foot block because I did it all inside of a two story house.

You were insane. And again, this is why I like California. Why? People here are just as insane. At least you could be out and about walking along the coast. That's what he beat me that day. He did 320 flights of stairs because he did it in San Francisco. Asshole. Um, I still, I can't feel bad.

He beat me fair and square. True. But yeah, I liked the posts that you guys both, both posted the next day about not really being able to walk very well. I could move. I could not move. And then I tried to do a, uh, another challenge because he, he beat me that same day with 50,000 steps in one day.

He did 50,000 steps and 320 flights of stairs in one day. That is insane. I hope you're okay out there. Actually, I haven't seen many posts from you recently. Maybe you're still in traction. He has been kind of off the, off the grid. Who knows? Okay, man. Well, it's good to be, it's good to be back. All right.

It's good to have you here. Now we've got to crank that AC up again. It's getting a bit toasty up in here. Cheers. Cheers.

Our comment of the week comes from Miller, who actually left it on our Grumpy Old Geeks Facebook page. Uh, he left a link with the comment, disrupt, disrupt, disrupt, because we love talking about disruption so much recently.

Um, it was a Wired article, which I was hesitant to click on because I despise Wired. Why? I don't know. They pissed me off back in like the nineties and I've just never gotten over it. I suppose I should. I love that. Their security stuff is really good. They had Kevin Paulson editing for a while, who was a, uh, uh, straight up thug criminal, um, which is good.

Yeah. Well, this was a great article. Uh, the faster a new technology takes off, the harder it falls. Uh, basically the gist of the article says the bell curve is dead for technologies and everything is now what we call a shark fin. Instant, instant adoption, instant adoption, uh, instant failure, uh, no time at all for anything to, to kind of take hold or, or sit and gel for a while.

It's, it's, you basically, you know, right away, whether you failed or not. That, that's, that's so terrible. Yeah, it's true though. I mean, it's true. It's the, everything just comes and goes. I mean, it, it, everything hits so fast. Like look at, uh, what was that game we were playing?

I can't remember the name of it. The trivia game. Oh, trivia. No quiz up. Oh, quiz up. Yeah. Quiz up has slowed down already a lot, quite a bit. Everybody, like they, it's almost like binge watching, you know, they binge, binge app and then get tired of it and then it goes away and they forget about it. That seems to be the way that we're going just with society in general.

I mean, I, I've been saying for a while now that the networks are better fucking wisen up to that or else they're going to be dead too because everybody wants to get their show like they're getting house of cards or anything. Now every single episode comes out, you binge watch over a weekend and you're done. Yep. I've been doing orange is the new black.

That's my new one. Yeah. I think, I think we should call this the goldfish economy because everybody's got the memory of a goldfish. Yeah. It does seem to be that way. It's, um, we see that now with apps. We see that online. I mean, there's the, you know, a site will do really, really well for a couple, a couple months maybe. And then everybody kind of forgets about it.

Um, there, you know, there's obvious things like Twitter or Facebook that again, maybe like the podcasting got in early enough that they hit that critical mass where you feel like you have to be there all the time. Everything else it's fly by night. I guarantee you things like Snapchat won't be around, you know?

Yeah. That's going to go down as the biggest mistake in internet history. Him not taking the money. Him not taking the money. Yep. Absolutely. And I mean, is Pinterest even a thing anymore? It was such a thing for, so for, I mean, it took them years to get to the point where they hit critical mass. And now I don't hear it mentioned anywhere anymore.

It's basically gone back to its core group of moms at home. Yeah. They still use it. It's, it's not, nobody else cares anymore. Thank God. Except for some, you know, absolutely silly management, you know, 20 year old interns that make sure that they, you know, go into the office and say, well, this client needs to be on Pinterest.

They need to be there. Yeah. Can you do, can you write an API to connect your whatever? I'm like, that's the, that's the upside. I have written tons of Facebook integrations. I've written a ton of Twitter integrations. Just about every API integration that you can think of. Yeah. The one that I've fortunately never had to write is a Pinterest integration.

Thank, thank God. Yeah. This whole curve is, is, I mean, it's a little depressing to me, but I definitely, I agree with this article a hundred percent. This is what I've definitely, you know, noticed just from, from being in the industry. It's, it's, you know, really, really big, really, really quick.

And then just gone. Yeah. There's no like magic middle where everybody kind of stays around and you can build your business. And that was, it's a funny thing. I barely read, I didn't even have to read the article because as soon as I saw the graphs, I knew exactly what it meant. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. The graphic is just amazing and it, and it nails it. And the fact that it's a shark fin is hilarious.

Yeah. It really is. Done. Then it's like a shark. You see the curve and then you're dead. Yeah. The problem that I started, like, I think this is, you know, for TV and stuff like that, it's great. Binge watching is awesome. But as a, as a lifestyle, this shark fin thing is so stressful and, and not even just like, especially for us as developers, because we have to, we get these things flung in our face and we have to learn it really, really fast and get on it and get on it and get on it.

And we put all this useless knowledge in our head because the technology is then gone. Yeah. It's absolutely useless in like two months and nobody cares anymore. Um, I find it even frustrating as a consumer. It's like, to a certain extent, I don't care because for me, it's like you're getting these new apps and trying them out.

That's fodder for the show. Yeah. But if I weren't doing the show, I'd just be like, every time anybody told me about a new app, I'd be like, fuck it. I'm not even gonna look. Yeah. If you're still talking about it in three months, then I'll take a look at it. Yeah. Or, you know, everybody's on it and it's like just one of those things where like you're in the same room and you want to try it together.

But like if I see it come through some social feed that I just, I don't even care anymore. And we've got actually one of those that came through my social feed and it'll be in the app segment. Yeah. That one I see, uh, that one is definitely on the downside of the curve already, I think.

It came out three days ago. Exactly. I think it's already on the downside of the curve, but we'll see what happens. Um, yeah. So thanks for that, Miller. I mean, uh, Miller's posted a couple links on our, on our Facebook page and they're always really good. And feel free if you guys got something you want us to talk about. Well, first off, you can pay for us to talk about it at tugboatyards.com or tug yards, go to tugyards.com or just, you know, post it, tweet us, whatever.

Yeah. Let us know. Yep.

In the news. In shocking news, um, Evan Spiegel from Snapchat is a douche. Shocking as in the shocker? Like one in the pink, two in the stink or two in the pink, one in the stink. I, I, I, you know, we'll have to ask the kids.

Um, yeah, Snapchat, uh, I'm sure you've all heard by now, massive security intrusions, names and usernames stolen, posted online, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Uh, the recap basically is in August, a security firm called, firm called Gibson Security warned Snapchat that there were loopholes in its code that left its users' personal information vulnerable to hackers.

Snapchat decided to ignore that. Then they decided later on that it was a fault of people, users themselves, who were mistreating and misusing one of their functions. Features. Features. It's not a bug, it's a feature. It's a, it's a feature to basically get this information. So therefore it's not their fault.

It's you stupid poo-poo heads. Yep. Well, A, this, there's two failures here. First failure is if somebody sends you a security warning. You pay attention. You pay attention because guess what? People who find security vulnerabilities tend to get frustrated if you don't close them.

Yes. And then they leak them. Yes. So tip number one, kids, if somebody tells you your shit's broken, fix it. Yes. And B, when it's exploited, own it. Don't be a douche. Yeah. So basically it's, again, we had talked about that entire kind of culture up there of just that self-entitlement, Silicon Valley, even though they're down here.

I was going to say, what do you mean up there? It doesn't matter. They're down the damn road. All the money is coming from up there, even though they're down here. I thought this was Silicon Beach. This is Silicon Beach. And we got the same attitude. It's just that attitude that we couldn't possibly do anything wrong. It's all you guys. Our stuff is great. So screw you.

So I've got a new feature, even though I probably won't do this feature very often, but it ties in. It's my joke steal of the week because I had heard this one earlier today and I am stealing it. I will give props to Heidi and Frank on KLOS Radio here in Los Angeles because he dropped this one. Taylor Swift is reportedly dating the creator of Snapchat.

That totally makes sense as the guys in her life usually disappear after about 10 seconds. Come on. That's good. That's good. That's good. Okay. All right. I can't believe you busted out a Taylor Swift joke on our show. Well, you know, even in the comments that we've gotten on our iTunes things, they like the fact that we bring in the music industry and entertainment stuff.

So, you know. Okay. Just keeping it going. Totes. Totes. Cray-cray. What do we got here? What's this? Facebook? Oh, no. This is a different one. There's one that I saw yesterday where everybody can see your edit history for all time in Facebook. I thought we talked about that one. But other people can see it?

Everybody can, like, if you see a post that's been edited, you can see all the different iterations of that. Yeah. Which is, again, I don't know how I feel about that. I mean, it took them forever to add edit. I understand that some people may use this as a kind of a record of things that have happened, so it's good to see when people have changed it.

But it should be for the owner of the post, not for everybody on the post. Well, okay. Nobody should use Facebook as any kind of writ law or anything. But if you were having an argument with a friend and, you know, well, I remember your Facebook post where you said X and then he's, you know, since then gone back and changed it to Y.

At least you can now see that and go, you fucking changed that, you asshole. Busted. Busted. No, this Facebook story is something that I saw on, let's see, what website was that? Salon, I believe? Slate. Slate. Slate, which is a great website. I decided to delete all my Facebook activity.

Good luck. It was hard. That is the tagline on that. It's extraordinarily difficult. Yeah, there's Jennifer Goldbeck, I believe, or something like that. Look her up on Facebook. There's probably not much there because she actually did this experiment where she went through and basically said, I've decided Facebook is, you know, I don't want a record of things that I've said 10 years ago out there anymore.

It's, you know, it's for the here and now. I like it. So your idea of self-deleting posts. Thank you of femoral social networks. Yes. Well, they don't exist. See, I was right 10 years ago. That's going to be my fucking tag. That's going to be on my tombstone. You should just build one. Nobody will.

They will come, apparently. In a shark fin. They'll be gone. In a shark fin. They'll come and they'll be gone. But she went ahead and did it and explained exactly how difficult it was. Simply click delete 9,000, 900,000 times. You basically almost have to delete everything individually.

You do. And I've done it. I did it for about 5,000 items. Right. And the way that the interface is so janked up. On purpose. You cannot see everything in a given year, like based on a toggle that they have hidden. It's really difficult. I've done it. I'm back to it. It's like my thing is clean.

Right. Clean as a baby's arsehole is. I personally don't care if people read my baby shit. But I understand why some people would. But it's not surprising that they make it difficult. It is not in Facebook's best interest for you to delete your history. They want to keep all that stuff there.

So, you know, try it. She had mentioned that there are some third-party, you know, various JavaScript algorithmic crap. But it doesn't really work. So there's no real way to do it except for manually, one by one. And now it's like I'll leave stuff up for like five days and then just take it down.

Right. But the problem is it's still in their system. Yeah, they still have it. And this goes back to to actually delete your Facebook account is extremely difficult. And they won't even do it for weeks. Yeah. You know, you put it in the queue and they're like to give you time to change your mind. Yes. Just in case you're doing this because you're very embarrassed or pissed off.

And they lie about that time frame because I did that once and I went back like a month later and just tested it. Because I've killed my account multiple times. But I had to get another one back for work. So now I always have one. But the point was I went back and four weeks later logged back in with my credentials.

And it's like, congratulations, welcome back to Facebook. Here's all your data back. Here's all your stuff. Yep. Even though they said in two weeks your stuff would be gone for good and it was not. No. It never goes away and none of this stuff ever does. And remember that, kids, when you're doing this stuff. And again, like I said, I mean, I'm one of those people that just like – I decided a long time ago, take me as I am or don't take me at all.

The stuff I say may be stupid. Some of it may be puerile. Some of it may be offensive. Some of it. Okay, most of it. But I said it. I stand by it. And I am who I am, so it doesn't really bother me. Okay. And I understand even that things are out of context.

But my thought on it is, God forbid, I am in a job interview five years from now and somebody pulls out a Facebook post that I made like three days ago. If they're not willing to let me explain the context behind it, I don't want to work for you. Exactly. It's almost like a litmus test for them.

It's a litmus test for them because I'm not going to fucking change. I'm going to keep doing this. And by the way, I'm allowed to make fun of you and your stupid industry practices on my private Facebook posts. And if you want to see them and if you have a problem with them, fire me now or just don't hire me. I had a job one time where I used to make fun of the owner all the time like in public because it was just like five of us.

And then the company grew to about 20. Not so cool anymore. He pulled me aside with his – then he hired his best friend, the lawyer. So the lawyer then followed him around like a little shitty sheepdog. Yeah. And he's like, you shouldn't let him talk to you like that in public. And so he pulled me aside and he's like, you know, don't call me an asshole in front of everybody anymore.

And I'm like, can I call you an asshole in public? He's like, absolutely. He's like, fine with that. Know the rules and move along. Know the rules and live by them. And then they ended up suing me, those little fucking rat bitches. Lawyers in the porn industry are the worst people in the world. I can only imagine.

And it wasn't about porn. I wrote a search engine and they stole it from me. Yeah. What are you going to do? What are you going to do? Don't go into porn, kids. Don't go into porn. Both sides of it. So speaking of getting fucked, let's talk about AT&T. Well, this is one of my, I just won't shut up about it.

And I just, I'm waiting for the shark fin to catch up with me on this. Okay. Because this is, you're in the boat that I'm in with my ephemeral social network. Yeah. Yeah. Which would be Snapchat, which is going away. Yeah. So my thing as man, and I've screamed about many a time on these podcasts is unlimited data is going away.

And everybody, every single company is force feeding us onto the cloud and streaming and blah, blah, blah. And we never keep anything on our own devices anymore. We have to grab it from somewhere and pull it down. And once we have no more unlimited bandwidth, guess what? You're paying a ton of fucking money to get stuff that you already bought.

Yep. Again. So AT&T is already gearing up for this to happen. Yeah. They've been doing pilot programs down in the South. Yeah. And yeah. So this is starting to happen left, right, and center. And the most, this is, I just, we know we're fucked with this thing.

AT&T is starting up a sponsored data program. It will let Netflix go ahead and pay them a ton of money. So you don't have to pay it to stream from Netflix. Hey, I kind of like, no, because my Netflix bill is going to go up then. Probably. That's it. It's all going to end up getting passed back to, this is again, like we were talking about with the airlines about hidden fees, hidden costs and how they end up, we still get fucked anyways.

Who's going to win out of that? Netflix. Because they're going to have a ton of promotion and they're going to seem like good guys because they're going to go ahead and pay your AT&T bill. Yep. But AT&T is getting money from them and they're passing the charges back on to you that we get screwed no matter what. Plus the other problem I have with this is it's going to be the bigger companies that have the money.

It's basically going to squeeze out the field again. Netflix is going to basically be able to kill any other streaming movie providers. Yeah, exactly. So if I get my free AT&T, if I quote unquote, I'm doing air quotes here, free AT&T DSL sponsored by Netflix that month, do they, does this come into like, this is like the back door to net neutrality where then Amazon Prime is then throttled because Netflix gets priority access.

Exactly. Yeah. Exactly. It's fucking evil and it's coming soon. And they're just going to make it even harder and harder to figure out who's getting the money, why they're getting it, and to find content that isn't sponsored basically. So once again, they're paying for your eyeballs. Oh man.

Sucks, but it's coming people. I finally signed up for my Amazon Prime thing and I've been digging into that. Amazon Prime is great, but you know, they're, they're a big player too. I'm sure they'll do some sponsorship, but they, you know, if, if AT&T does it with Netflix, then Verizon will do it with Amazon. Yep.

And that's the game that you'll start to play left, right, and center. So you have like three different internet accounts going into your house and you have to buy, then there's a Kickstarter for the special router that lets you plug in all the different things. Right. And then there'll be a, there'll be a shark fin app that basically monitors your free usage versus your paid usage. And you're going to have to fucking keep track of everything.

And then you've got your Excel spreadsheet because you can't fucking trust it. Because you only get 250 gig a month per. But the Excel spreadsheet is in the cloud or maybe you're using Google Docs. So you have to check the bandwidth every time you use that. Yep. Oh, fun time. Is this a good world we're heading towards kids? Man.

Oh, Jesus. And speaking of that, I just found this particular story funny. The NSA is bad for business. The NSA is bad for business. This is another Slate story. It's another Slate story. I do like the site. Google, Apple, and Facebook. We have talked a lot about how they kind of fuck with our privacy and we're not fans of them.

They're banding together because they don't like the NSA fucking with our privacy because they want to fuck with it themselves is basically the gist of the story. It's like, you keep the hands off the data. We want it. Well, I think the story is a little bigger than that. It is a bit bigger. The fact that international companies are pulling out of the U.S., the U.S. business marketplace.

I mean, people are losing money hand over fist over this. And now that this is out, it's bad. I mean, granted, most of the tech jobs that we're losing are in India. So I guess India should be more pissed than we are. But it's a clusterfuck.

It really is. It is. It's an interesting little story. You know, I kidded a little bit about the premise behind it because that's what really made me chuckle. But if you give this story a quick read, which will be in our show notes, it's really interesting about how all these big companies are kind of just going, hold on a second, U.S. government.

This is starting to get a bit ridiculous. Yeah. When it starts to cost us money, then... When Google says that you're doing way too much on privacy intrusions. Yeah. You notice Facebook's not in here because they're still... They're still, you know... Facebook is in. Only Amazon is out of this coalition.

It's Apple, Google, Microsoft, Facebook, Twitter, Yahoo, LinkedIn, and AOL. LinkedIn. AOL. Oh, AOL. They're just trying to get the free press. Is Yahoo in here? Did you say Yahoo? Yeah. Yahoo as well. Okay. And they're the easiest to hack. So, and I only have one more big news story, which came out this morning.

Google is about to let strangers email you. Oh, from your Google Plus account? Yeah. Well, the deal is if you have a Google Plus account, and again, they're writing this as a feature. Let me just start with their particular little story spiel behind this.

Have you ever started typing an email to someone only to realize halfway through the draft that you haven't actually exchanged email addresses? No. If you are nodding your head yes, and already have a Google Plus profile, then you're in luck. Because now it is easier for people using Gmail and Google Plus to connect over email.

As an extension of some earlier, air quote, improvements that keep Gmail contacts automatically up to date using Google Plus, Gmail will now suggest your Google Plus connection as a recipient when you are composing a new email. Wow. That's kind of...

So basically, if you're on Google Plus and Gmail, anybody else on Google Plus will be able to email you if they want to. Great. They do say it's a one-time email. They will only allow it once. So that's kind of like a one-time spam pass that they're basically giving everyone.

So let me get this straight. I go to Google, I go to Gmail, sign up for a Gmail account, sign up for a Google Plus account, and follow you, and then it lets me email you. Yes. Wow. To your Gmail. Yeah. Okay. Now, they do state first, the other user will never actually see your email account.

They just see your Google Plus picture and name, but they don't see your email account. And they only get to email you once. But still, I've already thought of 10 different ways to game this system for my Nigerian spam syndicate.

Exactly. This is a fucking nightmare. I mean, somebody is going to write a script that basically just crashes Gmail with this thing. It wouldn't be hard. It really wouldn't be hard. But my point is, who the fuck is the product lead on Google Plus? Like, why has Google not killed this thing? Why do they keep getting these coupes?

Why do they keep getting these things that basically push Google Plus? Why are they not giving up on it? They're not giving up on it. The Google Plus product manager must have so much shit on the Google guys. That they push it on Google Plus, you know. No, Google Plus is not going away.

I don't care what anybody says. Oh, no. They refuse to let go of it. They're not going to let go of it. Everything that Google does now brings in Google Plus and pushes it in some way, shape, or form. Yeah. No, this is their future for social. Yeah. And it also feeds back into their search engine. And it's their Facebook, and they're never going to let it go.

You know, you can just, you know, we can laugh that Google Plus is dead, blah, ha, ha, ha. Or we can all laugh at it. But you know what? Again, pro tip right now, if you do not have a Google Plus account, make one so you can control what comes up, because it does tie into everything Google-related. I would definitely have one and have your basic information in there.

Yeah. I mean... And keep it updated. Yeah, I've got no problem with keeping my Google Plus account going. And I still have almost... I think I'm almost up to 11,000 followers on Google Plus. Right. None of which read anything I write. But that's okay. They can all email you now their pet projects.

That's great. Yeah. And I do get emails from people who, like, when you post, you know, you can put in with the little checkbox, email your Google Plus contacts, which, if you follow me on Google Plus and you ever check that box, we are no longer friends.

Yeah. Everybody that's done it, I have unfriended in a very public and humiliating way. Right. Yeah. Whatever. Yeah. I just, I don't know what the hell they're thinking over there with this. I don't either. And just as a quick, like, last point on that particular thing, you will be able to opt out of it.

But the default is, of course, opt-in. The default is opt-in, of course. Yeah. So... We went through this in the early 2000s. It's like default to opt-out. Yeah. But, again, what's in it for them? Yeah. That would be like being able to delete your posts on Facebook. They could make that so easy.

Yeah. You and I could program that in the next five minutes. But what's in it for them to do that? Yeah. And I guess back then when we did that, we were all small companies trying to make, you know, make a difference in the world. You know, even when Flickr was Flickr. And, you know, Technorati and all those guys.

Flock. No, Flock was just a browser. But whatever it was, it's like we all kind of bandied together and we'd all have lunch together. And we're like, yeah, let's make it easy. Let's make it... We were all about the better user experience for the users. Yeah. And now they're just like, well, we've got enough users where if we lose a couple hundred thousand, it really is not even a ding on the shark curve.

Yeah. So... I need another beer. Amen. Welcome to this week in shit we put on our computers. I had talked previously about the Buddhify app.

If you were interested in getting into meditation and how much I enjoyed it because I'm not one of those California hippy-dippy types that really likes that whole bullshit. You say that to yourself as many times as you have to, but we all know the truth. Well, Buddhify came in and, you know, they spoke the king's English with the accent.

So it was much better. They came out with Buddhify 2, which is fantastic because if you... Electric Boodaloo? Oh, they should have sometimes... People need to hire us for marketing. Send your dollars to Jason at GrumpyOgeeks.com.

That's a good one. They came out with version 2. I can't remember if the first one was free or not. I think it was... No, I think I paid for it. Okay. It might have been like a couple bucks. It only had... It didn't have that many meditations in it, which becomes a problem if you're trying to do basically like, you know, one or two a day.

Yeah. That are... They're all short ones, which is great. I mean, there are a lot of... There are some longer ones in there, but I'm sorry. I like meditation, but I don't have fucking 40 minutes. I got five. I want something to chill me out on a break, and it's really good for that. I go for the 15. I go for the 15-minute meditations. I like the five to seven-minute ones.

But if I too has come out, I believe it's $2.99 or maybe $3.99. There's a link in our show notes. That's one of the downsides is when you get an app, you can't see the pricing anymore. Even after they change it, it just says download. Yeah. I hate that. I know. I hate that too.

I want to see what it was. This one's really good. Big update. They've got a ton more meditations in it. Different timings, different spacings, different categories. They've got a whole category wheel now, which is, you know, what are you doing right now? It's like Facebook.

How are you feeling right now? That looks like a Pantone wheel. Yeah, it's like a Pantone wheel is how they designed it. It's a really nice design too. So they've got like, I'm going to sleep. I can't sleep. You know, just basic meditation. Don't ask me. Traveling, eating, work break, in the park. Okay. All these different categories.

Blah, blah, blah. So there's a ton more meditations in here. Now, is this a paid upgrade? Like if you had the first one, did it just upgrade? No, it's a completely different program. Oh, okay. It's actually been released as Budaphy 2. So you can keep the original and then buy the new one. God, I hate that shit so much.

Yeah, it's not a paid upgrade. There's a lot of stuff. Here's my last question. Is it a Plus app? So it works on the iPad? It does work on the iPad, which is nice. Well, I mean, I know it would work, but is there an iPad version? I don't know. Or do you have to 2X it? I did not check that. Okay, wow.

And it's not that beautiful anyways, and you're basically just listening. You just said it was beautiful. Well, Pantone wheel, but I mean, it's not like you're, you know, it's not plants versus zombies. I guess the point is to press the button and listen to it. Yes, you're supposed to actually turn the screen off while you're listening, or your eyes should be closed anyways.

So what difference does it fucking make? Oh, fine. God, you totally destroyed my zen. I'm going to have to listen to one of these on the break now. Is there Annoyed with co-hosts? There's a bitchy co-host setting on there. No, damn it. I'm going to suggest that for version 3. So yeah, I've got that.

It's good. I also have made, I'm thinking about making a switch. I've talked a lot about the Moves app for tracking. Ad nauseum, yes. Steps, et cetera, et cetera, and how nice looking it was. I just downloaded this morning a new app called Argus, which is completely free, and it is way more involved and better than Moves is.

It looks pretty. It's kind of like a DNA layout. Ooh, I like the little hexagons. It's got hexagons, and you can be friends with people, and you can include things. You can include, like, how much water you've drank and how much tea you've drank, and they've got all kinds of… How many times you peed? Does it have a pee question? It does not have pee, but it has a lot of different options in there.

You can take pictures of your food. Great for you Asians. Okay. What? Asians taking pictures of food? That's a meme on the internet. I don't care about the internet. Well, Google it. It's quite funny. And the plus side of this, as opposed to Moves, which is always promising, that it will go ahead and make APIs to work with devices built in right away from launch with this Argus.

The Pebble smartwatch, Bluetooth heart rate, Fitbit, Run Beta, Withings. It also directly, while this app itself is free, it also allows you to, like, do things like your blood pressure, your heartbeat, all that sort of stuff. In which, of course, you have to connect to a different app that costs $1.99, which is probably owned by them.

So this is their feeding path to make you buy other things. Well, that's cool. But they need to make money. Yeah, they do need to make money, which is… I would easily have paid $2.99 for this app. It's pretty cool. You hear that? Send 30% to Brian at grumpyoldgeeks.com. Exactly. Or just use the link. Oh, well, I can't do an affiliate link for something that's free.

Well, you can, but it's like… You can, but it's a bit… It's pissing in the wind. I'm getting 10% of zero. Yep. Yep. That's the story of my fucking life. Welcome to our world. So, anyways, it's a pretty cool app. I've only been using it, like I said, for about eight hours right now. It does seem to be more accurate than Moves.

It's definitely got a higher step count. Okay. Here's the thing. You don't have the new iPhone. No, and I don't even have the… I'm just using the 5, not the 5S with the super chip. Yeah, because the interesting thing with the super chip is that every app that's using the super chip all gives you the same data.

Yeah. You get the same data. So, this is just a pretty way to display it. But it's actually doing step tracking on yours, so it's trying to, you know, pull it out of your accelerometer data. Exactly. So, it's pretty, though. It's definitely very pretty. I'm going to play around with this for a while. I think Moves might be going away.

This is cooler. Thank God. And they seem to have stepped ahead, you know, like I said, with the integrations. So, if I do end up getting the Fitbit that I've been talking about this time… Or you find the one that I gave you. I don't know. Well, maybe we'll find it at Finn's because I'm pretty sure that's where it disappeared about five months ago. Okay.

Damn. This is why we can't have nice things. Well, hey, you know what? Be happy that I actually found two apps that I just discussed. That's true. That's true. This is normally your segment. So, speaking of my segment… Yes. So, I made a post the other day about there was a high-speed chase because I'm in California on vacation and there was a fucking high-speed chase outside my front door.

What would California be without that? Three helicopters hovering over the house. And I swear to God, one of them was Blue Thunder because I looked up and I saw the lights but I could not hear it. We call those a feature of Los Angeles. Are they ghetto birds? Yes. It's a feature. Okay. Thank you. Well, the feature… I made a post about it jokingly and Sean Bonner, who was our guest before, said, Hey, then maybe you can take a picture of the car and jelly it and then post it on Vine.

And all of a sudden, I'm like, what the hell is a jelly? Now I know what jelly is because I tried to get you to install it this morning and you're like, I can't find it in search. And I'm like, it's on the front page of every way that you get into iTunes. It was on the front page. But I don't pay attention to that. And when I searched for jelly, jelly birds or something came up first.

Okay. It was like some game. Well, that's because the search in iTunes is shit. It is horrible. So, jelly is from Biz Stone from Twitter fame. Right. And it's kind of like Quora with pictures. Quora is a site where you ask a question and people answer it.

This is the exact same thing, but on the phone. Or Yahoo Answers where everybody just says you're a dumb cunt. Yeah, that's true. Yeah. Oh, man. I forgot about the planes. The plane. Also a feature. Feature. Yes. A feature of your home. They may land on your head at any second. So far, there's not that many of my friends on there.

The questions are very banal. Yeah. And here's the deal with that. Mm-hmm. I was thinking about this on my drive over as I was screaming at the guy going 25 on Topanga again. Right. Don't take a picture of me. I'm going to jelly you right now and say. No, you're not.

Well, I'm going to, like all the young girls out there, I'm going to use this as a social network. Because this might be the key for grumpy old geeks. I'm going to take a picture of you and say, this man is the co-host of what show? And then we will see if we get. Okay. Snap away.

There we go. Real time. All right. Snapping. Posting. So. Jesus Christ. Hey, you know, social networks. That's the key to success. Success. If we jelly ourselves, we will be rolling in dough. We're jelling ourselves. So here's the deal.

We've become a donut. I already got a donut right here. So I go back and I start to think about things like Daniel Suarez's first book, Demon. And you have this like, you know, currency economy with, it almost goes back to Cory Doctorow's Down and Out in the Magic Kingdom with Wuffy and all that stuff.

Yeah. But if I had points or dollars in my account and I put in 20 bucks and I said, I need this question answered right now. Five bucks are the first correct answer. And that gives people a reason to answer it correctly. And that was my immediate thought.

You did make me download this and I actually played around with it for about five minutes this morning. Yeah. And I was like, if you had built in micro payments to something like this, it would actually be a value. It would be right now. No, it's not. No. Right. And even what you're actually doing with it, I find somewhat offensive, which is crowdsourcing for free.

Yeah. But really, people just play around with it because it's brand new and we don't know what to do. So it's mostly just jokes and stupid shit. Exactly. And it goes back to the same thing, the problem I have with Quora. And it's like, you're taking my brainwaves and profiting off of them somehow. I don't know how Quora does it, but either way.

Plus, like we've said all along, I mean, if you monetize something, people don't fuck around. They actually use it for what it's intended. And figure out how to game it faster. Exactly. Or that. Yeah. So it's a cute little thing. I'll never, ever use it. Yeah. I'm surprised they still have it.

But if it were a monetized, well, shark fin. Yeah. Like I said, this is the one I was mentioning earlier. This is three days old and I already see us on the down curve on it. I probably will not open this again in another two days. I know. It just makes you, it makes me sad that like months of developer effort, time, sweat, blood and tears went into building that thing properly.

And it's just garbage. It's going to go away. Yeah. Because there's no value to it. Monetize it, then it's got value. But nobody wants to pay for shit. Okay. Well, one thing I did pay for that I still find value in, let me pull it up here because I forgot to put it in the show notes.

Colossatron. Okay. I'm just waiting. I'm waiting. You're looking. Half Brick Studios, one of my favorite game companies. They did Jetpack Joyride and this one where you do uppercuts and punches and stuff.

Punch Quest. That was it. I knew I'd get there. I was like, I remember Punch Out. No. When I was a kid at 7-Eleven. Punch Out was great. Yeah. Punch Quest was fun. So they have this new one called Colossatron. I think it's a $1.99 hybrid app. Plays great on my iPad Air. And all it is is you are a space monster attacking the Earth.

Of course you are. And for some reason you're collecting money from damages. I don't know. Maybe he's a lawyer space monster. I don't know. It's a beautiful game though. It's kind of a one trick pony. Does he have a briefcase? No, he doesn't.

He doesn't. But things float in and you build him as he goes and he becomes this giant monster and then the army kills you and then you get a few bucks and start over again. Whatever. It's a time waster, but it's a really fun one and it's really pretty. And that's all. I mean, Half Brick Studios makes time wasting stupid apps that are fun that you waste a lot of time on.

Jetpack Joyride I played for way too long. But yeah, this was fun for I think $1.99. It was good. Okay. Big shout out to Mike Vinicore, our previous guest, for giving me the $50 iTunes gift certificate. So I've been going crazy with shit that I would never buy.

So this falls into the shit that I would never buy category. But it's fun. And it turned out to be great. Okay. Security. Ha! So the security stuff that we usually go through, it's been two weeks since we've had a chit-chat.

And the security news that's come out is so extensive and far-reaching that what I think I'm going to do is just put all of it. I'm going to do a pinboard dump into the show notes at grumpyoldgeeks.com slash 40, since this is our 40th episode, believe it or not. It's my age. The show's as old as me.

In a couple weeks, it'll catch up with me. But there is one thing that I want to talk about, and that is Jake Applebaum's talk at the 30th Chaos Computer Congress. I think that's it. 33C, I think, whatever it was.

30C3. Whatever. I'm surprised they didn't go with K's. KKK. It's Germany. They can't. Oh. It's in Berlin. Actually, they moved it this year to Hamburg, I believe. It's usually in Germany. Yes. And it goes over Christmas to New Year break type of thing.

Yeah. It's an amazing convention. I think there was like 9,000, 10,000 people there this year. But it's the 30th anniversary of this Congress. Right. But Jake Applebaum, a guy I knew from San Francisco back in the day, he gave me my first tour of kink.com.

He was the system admin at kink.com back then. Now he is a spokesman for WikiLeaks, and you probably don't want to know him. You don't want to have your phone in his contact list. That's for sure. Because he's been held over by the feds at airports and had his phone scanned and had a pretty rough time of it.

And he pretty much thinks that they've broken into his apartment in Berlin and jacked his computer from there. It's all sorts of stuff. But my point is that he did an amazing talk at this Congress in Hamburg. Hamburg. I think it's Hamburg. I'm hoping it's Hamburg over the break.

It's two hours long, but this is where he talks about all the data that has been released to Der Spiegel, which is the German publication, that talks about all the stuff that the NSA can do. And the catalog, he released the catalog of stuff that's kind of off-the-shelf stuff that you can just, if you're in the agency, you can order or buy.

Some are free. Some are viruses. Some are physical things. And it will blow your mind. It is a fantastic two hours to spend or hour to just sit and watch. I love the one that you had mentioned when we were on our little break, which is the little microscopic chip that they put on the end of an Ethernet cable.

Basically, anything that passes through that cable gets sent home. Yeah, it's incredible. So, say they want to get you for some reason. They want to see what you're doing. You order a cable off of Amazon. They think, nothing. Okay, you're not going to go down to the store to get an Ethernet cable.

You're just going to order it off Amazon. Intercept your shipment. Replace the cable. Boom. Next thing you know, everything that you're doing. And they've got things like, if you buy a laptop, they have pre-molded cases with, you know, electronics. And they don't even have to be on the motherboard.

They can be motherboard adjacent. Yeah. So, they swap out the case. They'll, you know, hijack the shipment in transit, which also leads to all of the questions about FedEx, UPS, who's compliant there, Amazon. Who knows? And then they swap out your case.

Bob's your uncle. They got all your data. It's mind-blowing. I mean, just the, when you get down to the minutiae of, like, how crazy these guys have gotten with how to steal your stuff. USB cables. This USB cable that my microphone's plugged into right now could easily have a chip in it, and you have to take it apart, examine it with a microscope to find it.

You know, that pretty much sums it up. You're just, if they want you, they got you. Oh, yeah. I mean, that's been understood as far as I'm concerned. Well, it's been understood, but now you see how they do it, and it's just like, holy. It's ingenious. I mean, it's impressive.

It really is. Like, it's just on an intellectual level, it's amazing. Yeah, from nerd porn, it's great. Yeah, it's unbelievable, nerd porn. Sucks. Definitely sucks. Yeah, definitely sucks. I mean, you just learn more and more that the laws don't matter.

It is what it is. If they want you, they'll find a way. They'll get you done. Kinda. Security. Ha ha. All these links will be in the show notes. Check it out. Yeah. Seriously. If you're, like, really happy and just can't handle being that happy, go ahead and read them.

Because it'll ruin it for you. Jason's got a bunch of good stories this time around. Yeah, I followed pretty much, since I've had two weeks to not prep for the show, I've been prepping for the show. I took two weeks not looking up security items and actually being happy for once. No. It, uh, yeah, fuck it.

The whip's not dead. Over the break, I flew into Toronto on Christmas Day, actually, and we have a bit of a tradition when I get into Toronto. Uh, that day, um, everybody kind of finishes up their stuff with their family, and we meet at the only pub open in downtown Toronto called the Dogs Bullocks.

I've got a picture of that place. Yes. Yeah. I never went in. Yeah, don't. The only reason we go there is because it's the only pub open that night. It's like Sizzler on a holiday. Yeah, and a bunch of us kind of meet and get together, and, uh, I missed last year, but, uh, for the past two years running, Cards Against Humanity is played that evening, which I'd never played before.

That was my first time. Amazingly awesome game. I've never played. My brother plays. He loves it. It's so much fun. It's completely wrong. It's disturbing. It's hilarious, and it's my only favorite card game in the world anymore. Okay. So, if you want to play with me, Jason at Grumpy Old Geeks, because I don't have any friends, and I'd like to play some cards.

I'd imagine there's probably an online version. If they haven't made an app yet, they probably should. I'm not that fucking pathetic. Yeah, but it helps if you actually know the people, because that's part of the game is that you're playing specifically towards them, like you pick your cards based on. Okay. Anyways, it's a lot of fun, and it's horrible.

The whole point of that preamble is I found something on the web this week that is inspired by, and they go, thanks to Cards Against Humanity for the inspiration for this site. This is Headlines Against Humanity, and the tagline on this is, because page view journalism sucks, which you and I both really agree with.

Exactly. You know, this is the Huffington Post thing that we always rail against. So, you load up the site, and basically, it presents you with two headlines, and you have to guess which one is real and which one isn't. Kind of like our Realer the Onion segment that we do occasionally here. So, let's pull this up. Okay, Jason.

Headline number one. Remember the dinosaurs from Pee-wee's Big Adventure? You're not going to like what they're doing now. Headline number two. These two contestants pit the church against the devil. Find out who wins. Which one do you think is real, Jason? I'm going to go with the second one. And these two contestants pit the church against the devil.

Sad but true. Yes. That one is the real headline. Okay, one more. And then it links to the article, so you can do that, but we'll play again. Okay, one more. Article one. You peed on me, but it's okay. This New Year's Eve misconnection is an instant classic. Number two. Why this girl has a box of heads is even more disturbing than it looks.

Actually, both of those could come off the Huffington Post. Yeah, seriously. The nerd in me wants the first one to be true, but I'm going to go with the second one again. Read headline. Sad but true. Oh, you nailed it, man. Well done. Okay, anyways, as you can see, this is, if you were as fed up with the Huffington Post and the fucking bullshit, sad state of journalism in this world now as I am, you will love this site.

When I first found it, I spent an hour on it. Good times. All right, yes, that would be headlinesagainsthumanity.com. That's right, and the second site I found actually was posted on my Facebook wall by somebody who was like, I bet you think this is hilarious. Worst client comments turned into posters.

And this is off Bored Panda. The link will be in our thing. But there's a bunch of really great posters that worked in sayings like that. I really like the color, but can you change it? Yes. I'm the target market, and I don't like it. These are beautiful posters, too.

These are beautiful posters with these amazing sayings. Can the woman in this picture look like she's burning 300 calories? Now, I'm assuming these are all actual client comments, and we've had sites like this before. I like this. But this is an actual designer that has done it, and they're gorgeous. They're beautiful.

These are amazing. I like it, but can the snow look a little warmer? The target audience is males and females age zero and up. The dog is off brand? Yeah, and these are just like beautiful posters.

And I'm actually at – Wendy Marvel, please stop listing that right now, my business partner. I'm actually going to find some of these that have actually used real comments that I know that they've said to us. And this is going to be your present. I'm going to get them printed. These are fantastic. That just doesn't look premium.

Oh. Oh, okay, yeah. Anyways, we're getting lost in it. Yeah. Turn it off. Turn it off. Turn it off. Turn it off. And finally, I found – it was my – again, I wish our friend Bob would have come up to join us since we're together for this recording.

Because I wanted him to record one new bumper for us. Listicle of the week. Since I love listicles so much, I did find a listicle that I thought was good, of course, off the Huffington Post. Side boobs. But I'm sure they probably stole it from someone else. Side boobs. No.

It's happy birthday, iPhone. Here are seven things you killed. And I thought this was really interesting. Number one, roadmaps. Table manners. That should have been number one. Table manners. The Blackberry. Alarm clocks. Point and shoot cameras. The iPod. Our attention span, which I agree with.

Squirrel. And I think that was all seven, so there you go. Oh, okay. So that was my listicle of the week. I think I want to do a segment on listicles who can't count because they'll be like – these are the 21 things in here. And then there's the 18. Yeah, I've seen that many a time.

Very funny. Oh, that's the – I forgot my iPhone one with the little hot Asian chick side boob. See, there is the side boob. There is a side – well, it can't be Huffington Post without side boob. And look, down in the – you may like side boob. Side boob. Robot hand jobs. So there's six you may like articles recommended on the HuffPost site, three of which, so side boob.

Excellent. Thanks, HuffPo. You're awesome.

I know it says ear candy, but sometimes my ears are busy and I like to look at things with my – I like to listen to things with my eyes. And this week, Sherlock. I'm just – I'm so happy Sherlock is back. Sherlock is the BBC series, the re-envisioning of Sherlock Holmes with Benedict Cumberbatch.

Right. And the Hobbit dude. Which one? The one that plays the Hobbit and the new Hobbit. Oh, Martin Freeman? Yeah. Originally from the UK office. Yes. Yes. He – it's been – And also in the make of Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy.

Yes, yes. He was in that. So it's sci-fi geekdom there. For sure. Oh, okay. Tangent. Did you like the Hitchhiker's movie? Yes and no. I like that they made it. I didn't actually enjoy it. I didn't like it the first time through, but on subsequent viewings, I think it's fantastic.

Okay. Watch it again, and it's all we're ever going to get, so you know what? That's for sure. You know what? Learn to like it. There will be no So Long and Thanks for All the Fish. Yes. And there will certainly, unfortunately, be no Dirk Gently, which is my favorite. But Sherlock, back to Sherlock. And Sherlock and – or Benedict Cumberbatch and Martin Freeman are in the new Hobbit movie, The Desolation of Smaug.

Which I thought it was good. I liked it. The first one bored the crowd out of me. The first one was boring. The second one was great. The second one was fantastic. I was pissed when it was over. So Sherlock, the initial point of this, if you haven't seen Sherlock, which I was under the assumption that everybody I knew has seen Sherlock.

This is – the third season is out. This is what I'm getting to. The guy I live with in Chicago hasn't seen it. You haven't seen it. Two people that I would have just assumed from the get-go would have seen and loved this series have not seen it. The first two series are on Netflix.

The new one's out now on – That's the best network of them all, isn't it? Yes. As my brother would like to say, everything's on it. No, my brother just likes to say, I have friends in Sweden. Pirate Bay reference if you're that slow.

Anyway, which I was. So Sherlock airs in the U.S. Season three airs January 18th on PBS Masterpiece. You have time to go to Netflix and watch the first two seasons. And number three – so they've aired two episodes of the three-parter for season three.

And the third one comes out on Sunday. Right. On BitTorrent. And it's amazing. It's fantastic. I love it. I'm just – I am tickled pink that it's back. They took a two-year hiatus because Benedict Cumberbatch and his Cumberbitches – Had to do well.

He did Star Trek. He did Star Trek. So again, this is like – Well, he did Star Trek. He played Julian Assange in the WikiLeaks movie. Right, which I didn't see. I didn't either. I heard it was shit. Kevin Mitnick posted on his Twitter that it was crap, so I didn't go. He compared it to the movie about him, and I've seen the movie about him.

That was terrible. So anyway, if you have not seen Sherlock, see Sherlock. I'm a huge mark for Sherlock Holmes. I've read – I read all the stories when I was 14, and I love them. And these guys do. It's a retelling. It does it so much justice.

It's written by Stephen Moffat. Or it's created by Stephen Moffat. He doesn't write all of them. Also from The Office. Stephen Moffat did The Office? He was a co-producer on it, I believe. Oh. The UK version, I guess. Yeah, but he also did Coupling. We talked about this on the episode with Rudy Jechaun. Yep. So definitely check it out.

Okay. I will. You're fucking better. Well, did you like the movies? Hmm? The Robert Downey Jr. bullshit movies. I did. Oh, you did like those? Actually, I liked them a lot. I thought they were fun. All right. Like I said, I'm a mark for Sherlock, so you can really tell when somebody that is making those things knows the lore and the backstory.

Yeah. And if there are in-jokes... They're faithful to the... Yeah. And even if it's not faithful, if there are enough in-jokes and winks to the original, then I can go with it. But I love the Robert Downey Jr. ones. I thought they were fun. Cool. They were just stupid popcorn, but they were fun, and I love Robert Downey Jr. Oh, come on.

He's great. They let him out of jail to film a fucking movie. Which one? What movie did they let him out of jail for? I don't remember what movie it was, but when he was busted and he was put in jail for the whole drug binging and then waking up in a neighbor's daughter's bedroom, and then they threw him to jail for a while, they let him out to shoot a movie.

Welcome to Hollywood. I don't believe they let us out of jail. Oh, we're not going to go make a movie. We've got a podcast to record on Friday. You're going to have to let me out of jail. Well, when our podcast starts bringing in $100 million for the local economy, then they'll probably let us out of jail. Whatever. No, look.

Think about it. No, no, no. I can't do it. There's a lot of people that have a lot of money riding on him, like gaffers, craft services. All those people don't get paid if he's in jail. Yeah, he was a douchebag. Let him out of jail. Then throw his ass back in. Okay. Anyway, next topic. I can't do my epic Robert Downey Jr. rant again.

I did it four years ago at the Oscars, and it's still a thing of legend that people talk about that were there. So, moving on. Moving on. Let's go. Rather than have any kind of music or anything for ear candy, I figured this is the appropriate segment for it. I was in need of a new pair of headphones.

I'm a bit of an audiophile. Did the music whole engineering thing in college, et cetera, et cetera. So, I was like, it's fucking time. I need a new pair of decent studio quality sitting here recording the podcast, just listening to music when I really want to hear a decent pair of headphones.

I went to the iTunes store, and, you know, the Beats by Dre are everywhere now. It's basically the only pair of headphones that exist in the world anymore if you believe in, you know, kids or you look around or you see any advertising. I tried them all out. They're basically, they're all, even the lower level models are fucking expensive.

They're hideously expensive. And they're hideous. They're horrible. They sound horrible. Really? The quality on the lower level models is really bad. I will say, the studio level ones, the sound is absolutely fantastic. It's ridiculously good. But those things are 270 bucks.

For the high end? Yeah. 270. The high end are 270. How much are the low end? Like 100? Something like that. They're like 100. I think there's another, there's like three levels. There's 100, there's 150, and then there's like the 270 ones. The 100 and the 150 ones, fucking free white ones that come with your phone sound better.

Really? As far as I'm concerned. Okay. Yeah. They're, they're, they're shit. Marketing. It's all just marketing. Um, and to illustrate that, I actually ended up getting a lower level. I've always been a Sennheiser fan. They do great, great headphones. Um, they don't look all that fly. They aren't that cool. Uh, they don't have a doctor behind them.

Oh, doctor. Make me some headphones. But they're, they've been doing headphones, they've been doing audio engineering, and they've been doing audio gear for, for fucking ever. Um, and I ended up picking up, uh, HD 280s, which are basically 90 bucks and sound as good as the $270 Beats by Dre headphones.

They just don't look as pretty. Yeah. I mean, I had, I had some really nice Sennheisers. I think I paid 120 for my old pair. Right. The only problem I had with them is they were really hot. And after a while, the, uh, the pleather on the ears kind of wore out. Right. Um, but they were, I mean, the sound quality was amazing.

They were just hot. And in California, you need cool. That's why Dre's in the, in the mix. Cause he's cool. Right. Yeah. Anyways, uh, the, they're both listed in the show notes. Um, if you, if you're looking for something super high end and you've got to have that cool, like I gotta have my Beats by Dre, uh, the Beat Studio, 270 bucks.

If you're willing to drop that really good sound, really good sound for 90 bucks, the Sennheisers are amazing, just as good. And if you go super high end on Sennheisers, you're going to get even better, but you probably, you don't need it because you're probably going to be listening to things off your iPhone and their MP3s.

And unless you're listening to flax that are recorded like 760, you know, quality, you're not going to notice a fucking difference anyways. Yeah. Most people aren't going to notice the difference. I, I have got these pair of the, these bows that you were listening to before my bows, uh, noise canceling ones.

I've had these things for probably six years now. I think they, they held up great. They last like a motherfucker and, uh, the sound quality is amazing. So I'm never getting rid of it until these things break or somebody steals them from me. I'm sticking with these bows. I mean, this is like the second gen that they came out with, the noise canceling ones.

I love them. A noise, but I have a pair of those, um, for plane rides and they're fantastic. Yeah. That's, you can hear everything perfectly and everything else is drowned out. You get rid of the hum. Everything is fantastic. I actually use them when I was in an office surrounded by women who would chatter all day.

Right. It does have, there's a setting for, for high end, for jetty chatter. Chatty the chatters. Yes, exactly. Um, they, they should come standard in any San Francisco cube farm. Or marriages. Ooh, I can cut that bit.

Ooh, fancy. The only reason I put this in ooh fancy is because it's something that they would say on the show. I'm a huge fan of ABFAB. Are you part of the ABFAB cult? No, I'm not. Absolutely fabulous. British show. Jennifer Saunders.

Oh my God. It's been off the air for years. It's been off the air for years, but they're going to do a goddamn movie. Are they kickstartering it? No. Oh my goodness. Fancy. Fancy. I am so excited about this. I can't even talk about it. Wait, how are they going to fund it? The old fashioned way.

Oh, investors and money. Investors and money. And studios. Studios. And the whole deal. Wow. The way that proper people do things. Oh, fabulous people do things. Fabulous people do things that way. Actually, this brings me on a quick tangent really quickly. Let's talk about this because I just got the news today, oh boy, that our friend who we pimped his Kickstarter quite a bit, Mr. Zane Lamprey, I still haven't seen a show.

I haven't seen a show either. All I've gotten is a really terrible t-shirt. I've gotten a really terrible t-shirt. I haven't seen a show yet. Got a few emails about how they decided to make them an hour long show, which is why it's now taking them so long to edit them. But today I got a press release saying that he's been hired on to a show, some sort of reality TV thing about he's going to be a judge and it's some sort of inventors, but they have to battle each other.

So it's even more ridiculous than the current crop of reality shows. Like Junkyard Wars or something? Something like that. I didn't read the entire press release because I saw it and I got so annoyed about the fact that he had pimped Kickstarter so hard and how this is going to be the way that he's going to do things from now on and bring things direct to us. We haven't gotten a show yet, even though I paid money for it, and he's already signed on back on the old school model and he's doing a show for a network.

Interesting. Zing. Hmm. I wonder if Amanda Palmer is going to Kickstarter her next album or do you think it might be studio money? Maybe studio money. Who knows? Maybe we should redo this segment as Kickstarter in the balls since I just felt like talking about that really quickly. Also, just as a quick note for that as well, Kickstarter did a funny little, did a video for their year-end review.

I got spammed by it multiple times. I never watched it though. They spammed everybody about it and it was a list of things that I've never paid attention to. Listicle? It was a listicle of things that sucked. They even sucked? Well, no, it didn't suck, but it's like they're hits of the year. Oh, okay. I thought it was really strange that they actually included that company that got in all the trouble with the Beastie Boys.

Really? They included that as one of the hits of the year, which I guess it was. Well, they made money on it, so what are you going to do? Yeah, they made money, so what are you going to do? Oh, that's interesting. Anyways, back to the original point. Absolutely fabulous. Doing a movie the old-fashioned way. Okay. They don't take your money to fund it. I'm a little stuck on this Zane thing though, because, and I mentioned Junkyard Wars.

Yes. I would pay Kickstarter money if somebody would bring back Junkyard Wars. I never watch it. You never watch Junkyard Wars? I don't. There isn't a single reality TV show I watch. This was OG, man. This was this crazy British guy in a junkyard with all these inventors, and they would make trebuchets and shit like that.

It's not as OG as Robot Wars. It was before Robot Wars. Was that even before Robot Wars? I did watch Robot Wars. It was ten years before Robot Wars. All right. Fair enough. No, and they ruined it because Discovery bought it, and they brought in Americans. Americans fuck everything up. That is so true. Americans do fuck up everything. You know, the British were the original- The office.

No offense to people. People love the U.S. office. Nowhere near as good. I didn't like it either. I don't like that humor. But the British were the original imperialists, and then we threw their tea in the water, and now we're the imperialists, and we're screwing it up. But they did it right. They did it in a gentlemanly fashion.

They did it with a fine accent and a tip of the hat and a tip-tip cheerio. That's right. Stiff upper lip. All that. Okay. Sorry to sidetrack your AbFab segment there. Well, AbFab, again, great British show. There you go. Okay. Absolutely. Yeah, I think you would really enjoy it. You should go back and watch an episode on YouTube or something.

I will find it on one of my streaming services. Or your friend in Sweden. Yes, my friends in Sweden will be absolutely fabulous. Yes, but I'm very excited about the movie. A lot of people are. This is going to be good. It's good stuff. So the other thing that I had in fancy was I was getting really, really burnt out by all the CES coverage because I just think it's a circle jerk of stupidity, and I didn't want to do a big episode on it.

But one of the things that did come out of it is that, and I thought this was interesting, there's finally going to be an iPhone case that has storage built into it. So you can turn your iPhone from being a 16 gig to a 96 gig or whatever. Yeah. It's stupid expensive.

It's stupid expensive. It's like you'd have been cheaper to buy the upgraded iPhone to 64 or whatever. Yeah. Even if you have a 64 and you want another 64, tape two damn iPhones to get out. Or there's the concept of just go ahead and download it to your laptop.

The cloud. Or the cloud and then pay for it later. Whatever. There's easier ways around it than spending 180 bucks on another case. True. But I always wondered why there wasn't one, and now there is one. Yeah. I don't know. That was the only thing that came out of CES that I saw that was even slightly interesting.

Well, there was the Michael Bay kerfuffle. There was that. Which wasn't even that much of a kerfuffle. I thought with all the news that was going around with it, he's like, Michael Bay, storms offstage, blah, blah, blah. I figured there was a new movie coming out by him. Otherwise, why would there be all this coverage about it? Yeah. But he literally just walked off the stage, and I'm like, that was it?

Yeah. That was it? He got pissed off because, okay. The teleprompter didn't work. He was doing a presentation for... Samsung. Samsung for one of their curved 4D TVs, which I don't even know what the fuck that means. It means it's a big TV that's curved. Got a curve, yeah. That's it.

I've got something big that's got a slight curve to it as well. Oh, Jesus. Cover your ears, children. I was talking about my bike. Shut up and talk. Anyways. Finish. Finish your shit. No, so he was hired by them to come do, like, a... You know, I'm a director, and I live in the realm of fantasy, and these TVs will make my dreams seem even bigger.

Look, I just did what he should have been able to do. Yeah. Without a teleprompter. Apparently, his teleprompter fucked up. He got pissed off about it, and he walked off stage in the middle of the presentation. Yeah. And I just said all he needed to say. That's about it. The fact that he couldn't wing it is pretty damn pussy, you know?

It is. It is a little pathetic for him, and I think he comes off as very unprofessional and an idiot, but then again, look at the movies he makes. Terminator 2, baby. Terminator 2. That was actually a pretty good movie. No, it was not. No, it was not.

Did you notice from Terminator? But if you watch it on a 4D curved TV. Yes. It would be great. Did you notice from Terminator, not Terminator, Transformers 1 to Transformers 2? I'm sorry. Those movies, no. Can't. Well, I stopped watching number two because I could visibly tell that they cut corners on rendering time.

They didn't render as many frames of the robots breaking into a building, whatever the fuck they did. They didn't render as many frames, so it was herky-jerky. And Terminator 1, I watched that. I thought it was the stupidest damn movie I'd ever seen, but when I watched it at the dark light, it was gorgeous.

It was gorgeous. I am paid to bring fantasies to life and have them come to screen. Then I must go buy a Samsung 4K TV. If only you had one of these TVs, you would see what I meant you to see. I do not have 10K for the 4K. The TVs look stupid, but at least they're not pushing the 3D bullshit anymore.

Thank God. I think 3D is finally a stick of fork and it's done. Except for the movies. I still don't. Except for, although, to be fair, I finally, I saw Sandra Bullock, George Clooney, what the hell is it called? Shivity shit, gravity.

I saw that in 3D. It was amazing. I'm sorry. It was, to quote the kids, totes amazeballs. I'm sorry, but... Okay. And it would have sucked in 2D. I saw it in 2D and it was a steaming pile of bullock shit.

It was great in 3D. It was a steaming pile of shit. I thoroughly enjoyed it. It was, then go back and watch it on, try it, as an experiment. No. I'm not going to spend the money to go see the thing. You've asked me to do horrible things as experiments. Yeah. Play games that you turned out to love. I'm not going to go.

For a day. Shark fin. Exactly. Bugs versus shark fin. I thought it was great in 3D and I can't imagine it being any good in 2D, as you just proved. Yeah. It was terrible. Everybody that's seen it in 2D because... But that's such a limited application for 3D. If you're trying to actually tell...

The point, why it was so good is there wasn't really much of a fucking story. There was no story. Exactly. It was pure eye candy. We should have put this in the eye candy segment. Damn it. It was pure eye candy and it made it great. The 3D was stunning. I was...

It was great. I was really sitting in the theater just shoveling popcorn into my fucking pie hole. It was amazing. Anyways. I was watching it going, what the fuck is the hubbub? Why is she up for an award for this? I don't understand it being up for any award of visual or technical.

But it was... Yeah. But that's what made it. The robot that they built to swing her around to make her look like she was in space. Yeah. And my mom was like, couldn't they use some NASA stuff? NASA can turn off gravity, right? I just... Wow. I facepalmed on that one.

Then we totally have those skateboards from Back to the Future. Closing shout outs! So, it was nice to be back in the studio with the planes and the heat and the air conditioning and everything. Yes, the Venice studio is not exactly built for podcasting, but actually this is a little bit...

It was a little bit better to me than doing it over Skype, but... It was way more fun. It's definitely more fun. And we must be getting older and wiser because we did not drink all the beers. And neither of us is slurring at the moment. No. No, not at all. We had two beers each. Yeah, yeah. So, you know. I mean, granted, it is 2.18 in the afternoon.

So, that's a good thing. And we weren't going to not drink at all because we're about to head down to Finn's if you follow us on any of our lovely social networks. Yes, we're going to go... If you follow the Grumpy Old Geek's Pinterest page. Yes. We have pictures of the beers that we're going to drink. No, yeah. We're going to head down and go have a drink up.

So, hopefully somebody will show up. But I have a fairly good feeling that 3 in the afternoon on a Friday is not the time that most people can get out to go and drink with a bunch of old podcasters. That's a good time for us to pick. But there you go. Next time around, we're in the same place. We'll do a night thing. Yeah, I've got a flight in the morning, so I've got to go back and pack and maybe do some laundry so it doesn't stank up the plane and all that.

There was one thing that I forgot that I wanted to talk about a little bit was I've upgraded my Mac to 1Password 4. Right. I've been using 3. I had the latest app on my iDevices, but 4 on the Mac is a great upgrade. It's actually worth the upgrade.

I didn't think it was going to be, but, you know, I got a gift certificate that I mentioned before, so I did the upgrade. And it's gorgeous. It works flawlessly, but I think you had some problems. Well, I've got to tell you. I mean, I had been saying on this show that I was going to go ahead and do my digital revamp life, and I was switching over to 1Password about probably five months ago.

I didn't actually do it until over this break. Oh, good. Well, at least you did it. When I basically just took my Mac with me on my travels instead of actually having my PC or anything. So I was Mac only, and I went ahead and started to move all my passwords over and get everything into 1Password. Works flawlessly across all my iDevices.

Do you use Dropbox to sync or are you not? Using Dropbox to sync. Yeah, it's great. It's a phone, iPad, Mac. Perfect. Absolutely perfect. PC desktop version of 4. Perfect. 4 does not work for PC browser plugins yet. On any of your browsers?

Nothing. Doesn't work on Chrome. Doesn't work on Safari. Doesn't work on Firefox. Okay, real quick question. Did you uninstall the old one before you installed the new one? Okay. And I did all that sort of stuff. I wasted a little bit, and then I finally went to their site and I said, sorry, not working yet. Oh, my God. That's good. So they released it before it worked for any of the plugins for PC.

Oh, that's – guys, what are you doing? It's a bit annoying. Yeah. But, I mean, I'm generally working my way off PC in general, but since right now I am still kind of dual since my desktop is all set up here, it's beyond frustrating because I've now changed all my passwords to these unintelligible gobbledygooks.

And any time I want to log into anything on my PC, I actually have to run the app, copy and paste. No, it sucks just because I've been getting a lot of people that I know in my travels across the country who are mainly PC folks still who can't afford to do the switch to Mac to use 1Password.

And that's – I didn't know that. That's going to come back to bite me in the ass. Yeah, hold off. Yeah, hold off because they are still not working. Oh, man. It's a little frustrating, and it makes it very difficult. Yeah. But once they fix that, it's genius, and it's such a no-brainer, and it takes no time.

And if you're not doing this, you're an idiot, and I can't believe I waited as long as I did. Hey, see? I told you. I told you. And this is not sponsored by 1Password because we don't have any sponsors. But it's an amazing product. I really love it, and I really recommend everybody use it. Yeah, and that's like – forget about our security segments where you think we're probably lining our houses with tinfoil.

This actually makes sense. It's a no-brainer. As you see every day, Snapchat's passwords are up. Everybody's passwords end up online at some point. All this – this generates them for you. It's super simple to use. It's really easy to log in.

It's just a slightly different way of thinking about things, and it's really easy to make the transition, and you're done. Your security is almost as – it's basically as airtight as it can be online. Yeah, the only thing that I would recommend is going and checking out that article that I wrote that I never posted to the website about how to do – Well, how would they check that out then, Jason?

Someday I'll get around to it. There's a very clever way – I say it's clever because I came up with it, but it's probably not that clever then – to make sure that nobody ever gets your email – your actual email address. And this is when we get to the tinfoil bit. No, no, but it just makes it easy because that's how – Unless you're on Google Plus.

Yeah, that's true. Oh, did I just screw up your paper? No, no, you didn't. You didn't. No, but that's how Matt Honan got hacked was they got the email address, and he used the same email address across. And so once they get the email address, password, but if you never use an email address and you always use a forward or an alias for every site, and there's a very easy way with Google Docs to use an alias with just using the plus modifier.

But there's also a way to use – the plus modifiers will still kind of give you your main email address, but there's a way to just do aliases for accounts, like group accounts, so you can't get into your bank account or anything like that. We're getting a little bit – sorry, I'm going off.

I'm getting a little deep for a closing shout-out segment. I'm going off the rails. We'll talk about that again at some point. Okay, I just wanted to – one last question. How's the transition going to the Mac? Because it's been – we started this show when you were doing the transition to the Mac. Well, I didn't actually – again, I didn't really do it until over the break.

It's actually quite easy. I'm not going to drink the Mac Kool-Aid. I'm not going to say it's the best at everything. There are some things that are so ridiculously stupid that I can't even fucking believe it. But in general, it's easy.

Being able to use gestures since I've been on an iPhone and an iPad for so long makes total sense to me. I still haven't sat down and done a full project, but I definitely was able to take care of little bits here and there while I was on my break. It's definitely sexier.

Overall, liking it, yeah. Good. But having to hold down shift, delete, delete anything instead of just hitting delete. Command-delete. Or command-delete, whatever. I'm still not used to that. Your thumb is going to be your best friend. Okay, but I just like delete. I'm fairly confident about when I wanted to delete something.

See, I don't go along with that. It's done for a reason. But anyway, I'm glad you're finally getting there. Overall, it's fine. I mean, to be honest, there's .05% difference between PCs and Macs at this point. Everything runs.

Unless you have to spend four hours fixing your parents' Outlook, which I did over the break. Well, nobody should be using Outlook. No one. Well, on a PC, what else are you going to use? Thunderbird? I use Thunderbird. Oh, God. You're a fucking idiot. I know people that use Opera for mail.

Literally. People that just use Opera for SMP. I've always liked it. Thunderbird is fine. Okay. I actually like it better than MacMail. I actually see the icon there. Yeah, I like it better than MacMail. MacMail is just a steaming piece of shit with Google now. Oh, yeah. God, that thing. I use my iPad for most of my mail now because of that screw-up with Gmail over the Mavericks upgrade.

Oof. That's bad. Okay, we're rambling. We're rambling, and it's time for us to pack up and head down to the bar. Turn on the AC. Yes, let's crank the AC. See you guys next week. Later. Keep up with the Grumpy Old Geeks on the web at GrumpyOldGeeks.com, on Facebook at Facebook.com slash GrumpyOldGeeks, or email them at podcast at GrumpyOldGeeks.com.

Have a good week. Okay, last one to kill a bad guy buys the beer. We're driving to Florida. This January, Bare Knuckle Fighting Championship takes over the ocean. The inaugural Brews Cruise sails from Miami to the Bahamas aboard the Norwegian Jewel.

Three straight days with pool deck bare knuckle fights in the Caribbean. Massive parties, beach events, DJs, cigars, tequila tastings, and nonstop action. The lineup reveals coming soon. Cabins are disappearing fast, and the prices won't stay this low. Reserve your spot with just $200 down at BKFSEA.com.

At QVC, shopping is more than just checking out. It's discovering something new every day. Start with today's special value. Then explore exciting finds across the brands and categories you love.

From beauty and fashion to home, culinary, and outdoor living. Shop now at QVC.com.