156: I Can't Believe It's Not Buddha

Grumpy Old Geeks. A weekly talk show hosted by Brian Schulmeister and Jason DeFillipo discussing the finer points of what went wrong on the internet and who's to blame. Welcome to Grumpy Old Geeks episode 156 for April 15th, 2016. I've been at the car dealership all day. I'm Jason DeFillipo, by the way, I forgot to mention that. And I'm with my co-host, Brian Schulmeister.

I've been at the car dealership all day and, uh, cause I got a dog. Yeah. Which you're, which you incessantly remind me about talking about, but I never remind you to talk about it. You just do it. I go, Oh God, here we go with the dog again. Yeah. So, so the dog doesn't fit in my car anymore. So you had to buy a new car. I had to buy a new car. Oh, well, I'm, I'm going to lease a car. I've never done a lease before because I like to travel a lot and I like to drive across country. And with a lease, you only get 10,000 miles.

And that's, um, you know, if I drive to Chicago and back, that's 70% of my annual miles. True. Here's what I'm here. Here's what I figured out what I'm going to do. So how's that Prius? Um, kiss my ass. I'm never buying a Prius. I'm buying a Ford or I'm leasing a Ford escape. Okay. So I took my car in this morning and they're like, Hey, uh, yeah, we checked out your car. Um, and I did the research yesterday and Kelly blue book said it's worth, uh, between 3,147.

Right. Right. Right. Before I moved out to California, I put $2,000 worth of upgrades on it with the new wheels and tires. Yep. They offered me three grand. Yep. Guess what I'm doing? What? Keeping the damn car. Yeah. It's my backup. I'm going to have a bug out car.

I'm going to load, I'm going to load that thing up with power bars and water and gasoline. And then when the big one hits me and the focus and, and bam, bam, who I'm going to have to strap to the roof. Cause she doesn't fit in the car. We're heading to the Hills. That's what I'm going to do.

I'd like to remind everybody right now that Jason is the one that always preaches getting rid of possessions and stripping things down to the basics. And now he's the one with two cars. Well, you know, my, my roommate has a, a H3 Hummer and it breaks down every other week and she always has to borrow my car. So I'm thinking, yeah, maybe we'll just keep it and save, save money on the rentals.

Well, having an H3 Hummer is pretty stupid to begin with, but anyways. Well, no, it's like a big Jeep with no storage. We, we, we talked about this when you had to help me carry my portmanteau from my office. Yes. Your mini has more storage than the H3 Hummer.

To remind everyone of that as well, that an H3 Hummer is involved and we ended up having to use my mini. Yeah. Because we couldn't fit anything in. And by the way, your mini is not a mini. That's basically a giant box with tiny wheels. They make the wheels small to make it look mini, but that car is huge.

I like to call it the Maxi mini. Yeah. Well, I named my iPad Maxi so I could have the Maxi pad. Of course you did. Anyway. Well, since we're talking about cars. Let's move on to other car news. I thought I'd do some follow-up on the Tesla thing. I can't remember if it was the last Grumpy Old Geeks or one of the Up to Speeds that there was an article about how it's not about the cars with Tesla.

The real thing is their batteries. Well, now somebody else has come out and said it's not that either. The real exciting thing about Tesla is the company's business practices. No, because you were the one that said it's the battery, stupid. That's what it's exactly. Those were your words. So are you are you recanting?

No. You called our audience stupid, so I just want to make sure if you're on the same page. I like how you blend the line between the author of the article and what they say, and now you're putting those words into my mouth. Well, those words came out of your mouth. All right, Jason.

I'm going to go back and nitpick through every single episode where you read somebody else's words, and I'm going to attribute them to you from now on. And by the way, the article did not say it's the battery, stupid. That was your- Yes, Jason. Actually, it did. It was one of those subsidiary headlines that you don't see when you actually go to the article because every article in journalism now has to have 17 different headlines.

So it did, so fuck off. All right. This is going to be a good show. I'm happy. I'm tired already. Anyways, the whole point of this is that they're doing things completely different than any other automaker has ever done, and they're bucking trends and et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. I just like it because I still like Tesla, and a lot of people are bagging on them right now, and I still think that it is going to be changing the industry.

And if you could have gotten a Tesla today, I think you would have, Jason. Oh, no, I would have completely bought a Tesla if there was an SUV version that was under $200,000. You know, they're working on an SUV, but they're just too damn big. Yeah, he keeps putting cool stuff into it.

That's the problem. He doesn't strip it down like they are with the new, what is it, the S3 or whatever it is that the people have put down their $1,000 for and won't get another year. No, because I mean, I see the Tesla Model, the Tesla 2S is all over the place here in, obviously, Los Angeles because people like them.

That's the thing. I go down the street. I see 911, 911, Tesla Model S, Tesla Model S, 911, 911, Tesla Model S. It's like one of the two. I don't even know that they were going to even sell me a Ford SUV because I'm like, I went to the Ford dealership and they're like, would you like a Tesla or would you like a 911, you know?

Yeah, that's pretty funny. I mean, those are the standards that you see here, unless, of course, you're in Santa Monica and it's all Prius, Prius, Prius, Prius. Fucking Prius. I almost got killed by one three times this week. I haven't left the house, so I'm safe. And that's the thing now.

It's just like, we talked about John Wick, the movie John Wick, before, and I understand why he did his thing because of the puppy. Yes, I know. I'm talking about the puppy again. Fuck off. You're having a child. You'll be doing the same thing soon.

Believe me, you will. But when some Prius almost runs over my dog, I, oh, man, the blood boils. The blood boils. But anyways, okay, so it's not the battery, stupid. It's about the business model.

And so there we have it. Yep. And you don't have one yet, so. And I will never have one because I'm not rich. Oh, I don't know. You already have two cars. Maybe you'll have a third soon. In the news.

Toyota and Nissan are partnering with the Japanese government on intelligent mapping. We covered this on Up to Speed this week, but I thought I would like to talk to you about it again, Brian, just because it's interesting how Japanese are being smart about this, where in the U.S. everything's about me, me, me, me, me.

But about Japan, it's about everybody, everybody, everybody. Well, yeah, there's a long history in Japan of government and corporate working together for a common goal. We don't have that here. No, we don't. We don't. Which really kind of sucks.

Because I think if Tesla would share their data with Google, with all of their Tesla Model S's that are out on the road that we just talked about, and everybody that was – who was the one that took the entire Carnegie Mellon University staff?

Oh, that was Uber. Yeah. That was Uber, yeah. Yeah, yeah, if those guys would share their data, if everybody shared their data, then we could have self-driving cars probably about 10 times faster than – Yeah, but we still – that still assumes that we want self-driving cars.

I know it's going to be inevitable, but I'm not particularly thrilled about this. I am not in a rush to do it. I just – I had to go buy a new car today, so I'm not in a rush either. I got 60 months before I can have a self-driving car. Yeah, and as far as like the whole Tesla sharing thing goes, we've talked many times on this show about this is their endgame.

This is actually the thing that they are most – this is what Tesla is all about. Tesla is about the data coming from their cars. Yes. He gave away the battery model. What more do you want him to give away? Oh, he also gave the Hyperloop away. Yeah, there you go. The only thing I think he hasn't given away is how to land a rocket on a boat.

Yeah, he's not giving that away yet. We'll have GitHub next week for the telemetry on how to land a rocket on a boat. Yeah, I mean I don't doubt that if all these companies shared their data, we would have a much better mapping system, but it's not in their interest to do so. And it's a different culture over there in Japan.

It's not ever going to happen here. Yeah, but I think you're absolutely wrong. If everybody shared their data, then we would have more road schematics than, you know, any single company could have on their own. Or we could just use – It's just about schematics. You know, that's what it is. Or we could just use all the NSA information from all the planes flying overhead all the time.

I'm sure they've got everything mapped out pretty well. Yeah, but they're coming from the wrong angle, so you don't get height maps. Oh, whatever. I'm sorry. Hey, man, look, I'm a nerd. Sorry. You called me out for hating technology and all sorts of other things yesterday on Up to Speed.

So I'm just going to tell you right now, I hate technology, but I understand it. So I'm just telling you that the planes that are flying overhead, they're not going to give you the height maps that are needed for, oh, that's a bump in the road. Okay, so moving on, the New Yorker, rather randomly, has come out with a report about the taxi situation in Los Angeles.

Conventional taxi rides have dropped about 20%, and a lot of people are going, yay, that's great because we're getting rid of this outdated and slow motion crappy industry that didn't keep up with the times. But as the LA Taxi Commissioner President Eric Spiegelman points out, individual drivers have borne the brunt of the downturn, not necessarily the companies, especially because many of them drive full-time, while the majority of Uber and Lyft drivers are driving part-time to supplement income from other jobs.

So it kind of sucks on a personal level. No, it's, yeah, that's... Yes. See, grumpy old geeks, $1.55 and lower for exactly everything we've said here. And we have discussed why LA is such a different city than most because of public transport, being that this is a car culture city and it's very spread out, and it was never a case of people hailing down cabs in Los Angeles.

That never happened. Almost all of taxi consumption done before Uber and Lyft was based on you'd call ahead to get a cab to come to you, so that business has basically gone away. So you can argue that they were stupid to not move with the times in terms of developing the app and all that.

I 100% agree. But they weren't patrolling the streets like Uber and Lyft are because almost everybody in Los Angeles that is an actor slash model slash bartender slash whatever is also now an Uber slash Lyft driver. So they're everywhere. We have to actually take the triple threat to a quadruple threat.

It has. It has. I know. It's a little insane. So it's a different city here, and it's unfortunate because these people, that was their job. What's really interesting is in my neighborhood, I've noticed that there are a lot more cabs.

Just in the past, like, two months, every day, there are, like, five or six different cabs that I see when I'm out walking the dogs. I know. I said dogs. Shut up. But we're doing. We're going to have a new drunk, grumpy old keeps drinking game, which is every time Jason mentions dog, you're not going to make it through the first two segments.

And then when Brian starts to mention, baby, you know, you can't, you can't harp on that until it starts. See, this is, this is where you think that I'm an idiot. It's going to happen. You, you don't understand it yet.

You don't understand it. It's going to happen. Well, anyway, I've seen a lot more cabs in my neighborhood and I have seen less Ubers. So that's the interesting thing that's going on here in the Valley is people are actually calling cabs. So that's, that's, that's all I wanted to point it out.

That's it. That's it. Go ahead, baby boy. Let's talk about bots. Are you done yet? Because I'm just, I'm chilling over here until you brought so much fucking coffee and you're so ramped up today. I can't believe this. I'm checking out the Jason DeFilippo show. Talk to you guys later.

Oh, now you got nothing. Okay. All right. Bots. So there's a lot of information about bots going on right now. We've been talking about bots incessantly. Bots are being shoved down our faces. Bots, bots, bots, and more bots. So what the hell are bots? There's a nice article on Rico that kind of explains it. It's basically just, you know, instead of using an app now, it's, it's a vaguely somewhat AI that you'll be able to chat with in your normal space to be able to basically consume products.

So the whole point and why people are moving there is this is seen as a fresh opportunity for businesses because they're invading basically a personal space that they've not been able to get into before. So you'll be able to sit there while you're chatting with your friends and then send a pizza emoticon to a Domino's bot and the pizza shows up.

How exciting. Okay. Oh, okay. Now you're going to be pissy. No, I'm not being busy. It was the Jason DeFillippo show. Now it's the Brian Schulmeister show. So you tell me about bots and now you tell me about why, uh, uh, yeah, yeah.

Keep going. Keep going. And Facebook is getting into this big time. They have not been leading the charge so far because you haven't heard about many yet, but, uh, the store is coming for messenger. And as we've discussed, messenger is actually a fantastically massive, uh, entity, which always surprised me, but everybody's using messenger apparently.

So they're dropping a bot store pretty soon. Uh, and, uh, the theory is that they've been working with so many people behind the scenes the entire time, big companies and brands. So they've got, there's all ready to go and, uh, they're basically going to take over the bot, uh, revolution at this point from Microsoft because all they could invent was a Twitter bot that got incredibly racist.

So the interesting thing about the bots with Facebook is we, you and I both have to do a mea culpa on this one because we thought that when, when Facebook split Facebook into the messenger app to do, to do the, to do that, we thought it was the dumbest idea of all time.

Um, we were wrong. We have, we have to, we have to own that because if we don't own that, then we're just a bunch of douchebags. What were douchebags anyway? But anyway, we still, we still have to own that because we did not see that coming. Yeah. Uh, yeah. Well, I, you know, I just thought it was stupid.

I was like, why bother? It's built into Facebook. I can just do it on Facebook. Exactly. What the fuck's the point? Well, they wanted to take on built-in texting and messaging and they wanted to take on WhatsApp and all those things. Why would you bought WhatsApp? Yeah. Why would you split the fucking app when you bought WhatsApp?

It makes no sense. Yeah. That I still don't understand, but whatever. It is what it is. I know. Uh, I want to strangle Zuckerberg with his own fucking hoodie sometimes when I, when I think about this stuff, it's just like you bought the most popular messaging app on the planet for umpteen billion dollars.

And then you split out your messaging app from your product. Well, I, I just, I, I don't understand what the hell these people are doing. I don't get it. They've got a lot more money than you and I. Yeah. And more hoodies. So winning. Yeah.

Anyways, uh, we talk a lot about culture and, uh, what's going on with tech and the cycles that are going on. And there's an article by Jerry Murdoch and he comes from inside venture partners. So you think he might be a little bit biased because all he does is deal with putting together tech companies with VC funding.

Uh, he's basically saying with every crash comes a new cycle of opportunity. And I originally put this in here cause I thought this would be a really interesting article, but it doesn't really say anything. So if you want to get really, really bored, go ahead and read this. Cause it's basically a sales pitch saying it's all coming back guys. No, it's not.

No, it's not. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Um, yeah. Yeah. Let's, let's skip the last 30 seconds and move on to study finds male dominated professions are more at risk of being taken over by robots. Apparently if you've got a, uh, yeah.

Oh boy. Here we go. No, no. I'm just saying if you've got it, if you've got an, if you have an Audi instead of an innie, then you're probably going to lose your job. Researchers from Oxford university analyzed over 700 occupations included that over 47% of jobs are prone to automation.

This is not a surprise. If you listen to the show, we've been talking about it a lot. However, the interesting differentiation that they found is that, uh, typically male dominated industries, taxi drivers, truckers, taxi drivers, construction workers, et cetera, uh, uh, basically repeated tasks.

Uh, these are more prone to being taken over by robots than things that have to do with, uh, deciphering intentions, emotions, or coping with the unpredictable, which happen to be requirements in female dominated professions, such as nursing or teaching. And there's a pretty interesting video. And there's a pretty interesting video that goes on at a greater length and in more detail.

So it's interesting. Uh, dudes, you better figure stuff out, especially if you're just like swinging a hammer. Tune into your feminine side is what they're saying. Uh, the tablet market.

Uh, remember, uh, we weren't doing the show when tablets came along, but it was, uh, I think you and I both kind of scoffed a little bit at the whole tablet thing. It's like, well, why would you want that? I stood in line for the first iPad the day it came out. So I wasn't scoffing. Okay. You scoff.

I do not scoff. I do not scoff, sir. I certainly enjoy my iPad. It is nice to be able to sit on the couch and, and browse things and surf and all that sort of stuff. Uh, the pads are still for the most part content consumption devices, not production devices, which is, as Steve job said, it's a lean back device, not a lean into device.

Yes. Remember, remember that first, that first demo that he did where he's like the iPad you lean back with and the iPhone you lean into. I didn't watch that because I'm not, I'm not an Apple fan, but we like that. But, uh, this last week, uh, had basically, uh, celebrated two milestones for the tablet market.

It was the first full week of sales for Apple's newest iPad pro. And it was also the sixth anniversary of the first iPad, which came out in 2010. Uh, early predictions for the sales market were pretty much massive. And it hasn't really happened. Reality has fallen well short of the forecast. And what happened?

Well, the thing that we also didn't think would happen, smartphones were on a trend of just getting smaller and smaller. And we all wanted the smallest phone. And then all of a sudden it bounced right back up. And we wanted the biggest phone, which has bitten into the tablet market. Because if you've got the iPhone six plus, that is practically a tablet.

And if you've got one of those, you may not need a tablet. And, uh, the other thing being, of course, that, uh, the tablets are being kept for a lot longer, um, because they're fucking expensive and you're not going to replace them every two years. See, the thing is, they're not that expensive, but I, my iPad one, the one iPad that I bought in 2010, which I can't, I can't believe it's been six years since I bought my first iPad.

Uh, it's still in use. I sold it to my friend's, uh, parents. They're there. They are 86 and 87 years old. They use it every day to check their email and check their stocks and it still works. That's the crazy thing about it.

Yeah. And I think we're going to start to see that with phones too. I mean, you hear the rumblings already about how, you know, we're going to try to downplay the next Apple iPhone and how much they're going to sell. These things are good. I mean, they last a lot longer and the technical innovations aren't as big as they used to be. The leaps between versions are not that massive anymore.

I know a lot of people that are still quite happy with their iPhone five and have no interest in upgrading. Yeah. The interesting thing that I think is going to the only, I mean, they're, they're coming out with so much technical innovation just to sell more units. Um, you're going to see a depth perception in the cameras soon.

That's the big innovation for the next one. So you can actually scan a room and find out how far everything is away and do all your measurements because, because they're going to have dual cameras. That's one of the big innovations. I think this is actually good for technology as far as innovation goes, because they can't sit on their hands.

They can't sit on their hands because everybody's phone is actually good enough to do what they need to do. So they're going to have to come out with some crazy shit to make us want to buy a new phone. I don't, I don't need an iPhone seven. I got an iPhone six, six plus, and it's great.

I don't have an iPhone six S plus, but I don't need one. I do have an iPad pro. Love it. Got my, got my keyboard today. Hang on. Hang on. Let me finish. I got my keyboard today. You can't do a three hour show here, Jason. Okay, Brian, back to you.

Hold on. Drop a marker. No, no, I'm not dropping a marker. Way too long on everything. I'm just, you're way hopped up today. How much coffee did you have? I had so much fucking coffee, but that's what I could tell. And it's coming off real strong, Jason. That's all I'm saying. So speaking of drinking coffee and crazy ass shit, we've talked about magic leap before.

They've started to release a couple patents about, well, they use drinking coffee as an example, which is kind of funny. And this is all of the sort of stuff, the kind of technology that they're going to have to head to, to get us to buy new stuff. But this is a really funny article on Recode that gives them their kind of cell scenario, which is you're sitting in a coffee shop and upon detection of other parameters, the system can be configured to make it seem like all of a sudden you're in a Madagascar jungle where the beans came from.

Now, is this exciting to you? Only if it's the cat poop coffee. I thought it was bat guano. No, no, no. There's the cat poop coffee. There's a cat one too? Oh yeah, these cats, they eat the beans, they poop them out and then they turn them into coffee. I want the cat that ate the bat that ate the beans.

Ah, that's so meta. I think, I think we need Neo for that. Yes, I think we might. Uh, music labels are furious at YouTube again. So people in the music business used to complain that YouTube took their music and didn't pay them. Now the complaint has changed. You're not paying us enough. Well, this isn't that surprising.

We've been talking about this a lot. Uh, yeah, YouTube is the, the, they're the worst on payouts compared to Spotify or RDO who's getting sued and, uh, everybody else. Yeah. YouTube is the worst on payouts and it's also the place where most people go to listen to music regardless of what Spotify will try to tell you.

That's just not true. Um, so yeah, there's, there's some labels and, uh, there's some lobbying going on and there's a, there's going to probably be a lawsuit pretty shortly. Good times. Oh, sorry. Like Google doesn't have enough lawyers to handle this anyway. Okay. I know. Have you ever heard of iTunes allowances?

What the hell is that? Yeah. See, we don't have kids. And maybe if I had my baby at this point, I would have known about this. No way. This is, oh, now I get it. That's cool. So you can, so you can say if you, if you vacuum the living room, you can get like a dollar for an app. Well, it, it kind of worked more in the reverse.

What you could do is you could put an allowance of $20 per month, say, so they could spend your, your offspring could spend up to $20. Okay. So you could set that a monthly limit basically, uh, so that they didn't have to come to you and get approval or whatever. It's just, you're responsible. Here's your 20 bucks.

I'm sure you had to do something for it. Like vacuum your room. Uh, if you do all your chores, you get this 20 bucks per month that you can blow and you can set that limit and it's all up to you. You do whatever you want. They're getting rid of it. And that sounds like a great idea. Doesn't it? And now they have some other options.

And the reason that they say they're getting rid of it is they want to switch people over to something called family sharing options. Uh, that's family members access each other's purchases and also has an option where parents could be notified and asked to approve the iTunes purchases of their children. That seems to be an annoying extra step.

And it also seems to me that you're taking away the teaching of responsibility to your offspring. Here's your 20. You blew your 20 bucks on, on some stupid game. Well, that's all you got. I'm sorry. Yeah. When I was a kid, my allowance was $3 a week. These kids are getting 20. Yeah, I know.

So I think this is a bad move. I would much rather have that allowance feature for, for my potential future. Well, not potential anymore, but for my future offspring. And who wants to, as a parent, why do you want to be bothered every single time they try to buy something? I get it. If you're not doing the whole trust and responsibility and let's see if you can figure out how to learn to spend money wisely thing.

But if you're doing that, this seemed to be a great parent, you know, parent, uh, offspring teaching teachable moment, as it were Apple that you're taking away. I know that's, that's really stupid. That is a really stupid thing they're doing. And, and, and, and the apps that my kids, but I would be really pissed off that they got like Tinder or grinder, uh, those are free.

So you don't even get notified for those. So yes, well, uh, yeah, exactly. But so, yeah, you know, I don't, I don't get an Apple. This is dumb. That, that, that allowance feature is genius. They should have kept it. I know. I, we didn't even know it existed and now we're like mourning loss. I know and one thing I'm not going to mourn the loss of, and I am looking forward to is AMC is going to allow texting friendly theaters.

That means we are not. We have news on that. And that's why I have this new article in here. The internet blew up this week because AMC announced that they were considering adding texting theaters because millennials cannot survive more than an hour and a half without fucking texting constantly or swiping, whatever they swipe.

And so people just lost their minds. Okay. You cannot do this. And they have backtracked as of this morning. Oh, oh, okay. I was trying to buy a new car this morning. So I missed the, missed the update. Sorry. Yes. After all the hullabaloo on the internet this week, AMC apparently received a lot of online pushback and they have released a statement.

We have heard loud and clear that this is a concept our audience does not want. Yes, it does. Here's the deal. The audience wants it for the people who want to text, get them out of the theater that we're in. That's what we want. Well, they're saying no texting.

We're not going to let people do it. And I understand this. And this makes sense financially for them because older people like us are the ones that actually will go to movies. The millennials, not so much. They don't really care. They're happy watching movies on their phone and getting it from Sweden. So they're, they're kind of sticking with their base here.

And that's a smart move on their part. Okay. I just don't want texting in theaters. It's wrong. I don't want, you know what? I, I, I, it really bums me that the FCC has, has, it's a federal crime to own a cell phone jammer, right?

Yeah. Um, I, I know this because I used to own one and I found out too late that it was a federal crime. Uh, but I think movie theaters and your car should be the one place where cell phone jammers are allowed. Um, but yeah, okay.

If they're just going to do that, look at the arc light in LA, they will kick you out of the theater for texting. So that just, it is what it is, but okay. I'm glad AMC rolled back on this. I thought it would be fun though, just to have a whole theater of people. Remember that, that iconic photo of people with the 3d glasses or the Bill Gates one with the Oculus Rift or not Bill Gates, uh, Zuckerberg Zuckerberg.

But yes, I'm just thinking of a movie theater where everybody's watching a movie, but texting at the same time. Look, when I, when I first heard this, I was totally okay with it because I thought it would just be like, you'd have special showings, you know, just like there's the, the mommy and me showing in the theater. It's like the first one here's the millennial showing.

So get them all in that theater. I don't care. They won't be in mine anymore. Yeah. So anyways, and the final article I threw in for news this week is a, just a, another recap of the things that Malcolm Gladwell got wrong about some of his basic premises with the 10,000 hour rule. It's a, of course, it was obviously massively oversimplified and you can read how and why in a very long article.

Yeah, no, I'm sorry. This is not news. I mean, I'm, I'm glad the guys that did the research came out and said it, but we've known this for five years now that Malcolm Gladwell is a hack. He's a hack. Well, he's, he's right up there with Seth Godin and all these people that just steal research from other people, misinterpret it and then write books about it.

They become insanely popular because people like bite-sized nuggets of crap. Yes. I understand that. Yes. Yeah. I wouldn't call him a hack. He does. He oversimplifies and he distills to the point of not being quite right. But if you read the whole book, the 10,000 hour thing, he just went through a lot of statistics and a lot of different stories about it.

And he never fully just said, if you put in 10,000 hours, you'll become master of your domain. Yes, he did. That's 10,000 hours. He implicitly, he said that exceptionally like multiple times. That's 10,000 hours of a Seinfeldian non-masturbation, of course. No, he.

Anyways, I know it's not news, Jason, but you put in one story this week, so I had to fill it out. Okay. Okay. I had it in my notes too, but you just beat me to it because I've had more coffee. And we'll be right back. But now, a word from our sponsors.

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So get rid of it. I forgot about this program completely, and I was shocked to discover it is actually still on my computer. Well, why should I be shocked? I didn't do anything about it. I wouldn't have removed it, but I did this morning. Okay. QuickTime for Windows, RIP.

I can't believe QuickTime for Windows is still a thing, but when I was reading this, I'm like, QuickTime? I have not heard QuickTime in probably like 10 years because that was Apple's big proprietary algorithm that I think was, that's when they were pushing MP4 video as part of the whole spec, and then it just became like a standard.

And for the longest time, it was the best program on a PC to convert video files. Oh, it was great. Yeah, yeah. And you could do all sorts of stuff with QuickTime for Windows as far as like, you know, just even microphone recordings and things like that. But it had its uses, but it's long gone.

So if you can still get it on your computer, get rid of it. RIP, QuickTime. Yep. And Microsoft is joining us, you know, all the tech companies at this point in fighting against the U.S. government. They are suing the government for email data requests. They want to bring this case because they feel their customers have a right to know when the government obtains a warrant to read their emails and because Microsoft has a right to tell them, which I agree with.

Yes. I'm sorry. The government wants to read your emails. We should be able to tell you that the government is going to read your emails. I know this is not surprising that I am coming out in favor of Microsoft, but I do like to savor the moments when Jason does too. No, this isn't Microsoft. This is just, this is personal, this is civil liberties.

Exactly. Civil fucking liberties. I'm sorry. One of those. I live in the U.S. Oh, no shit. And apparently it wouldn't be much better in Canada. Right, Jason? Oh, yes. Because Canada has had the keys to unlock every BlackBerry's encrypted communication since 2010, that is six, five, five and a half years.

We're, we're, we're, we're coming up on a half a year. Yes. Yeah. But over five years, they've had the keys to the kingdom for BlackBerry. And remember what, I think it was India that said that BlackBerry couldn't actually be a business in India unless it gave them a backdoor.

Yeah. Well, apparently Canada just figured out how to do it without telling anybody. Well, this is a very, been very important to keep the strategic maple and poutine reserves safe. Oh, yes. But they could also read Barack Obama's emails. And since he is going to see what happens to John fucking snow earlier than anybody else, they might have the spoilers before anyone does.

This is true. Rather conveniently, though, in the, what, eight years I've been going back and forth between LA and Toronto, there's like maybe three people that still use BlackBerry. Well, those three people are fucked. Yeah. And the FBI has not actually used Celebrite, the company that we talked about before, who has all these backdoors into the iPhone.

They did not use them. How did that work? Did they just release, did Celebrite just release a PR statement and then we all just believed it? Or did the government say that they did it? I don't remember anymore. I don't know. They're Israeli and they have. They have their ways. They do because the Israeli hackers, I know a lot of Israeli hackers.

They're a bunch of my friends and these guys are fucking smart. So Celebrite might've actually just fired the guys, let them sell the, let them sell the hack to the FBI and then rehired them two days later because that's the kind of shit they do over there.

But anyway, the FBI has access to the contents of the San Bernardino, you know, terrorist. Last week I said it was Sacramento and I apologize. I was wrong on that one. But yeah, they figured it out and they bought an O-Day.

They, they literally bought an O-Day. And, and I do believe Brian, I think it was episode two of Grumpy Old Geeks three years ago where I said the smartest move that any programmer who knows how to do objective C would be right now to go get a job at Apple and build in as many O-Days and backdoors as you possibly can.

Quit Apple after like two to three years and then sell every single piece of code that you broke for millions of dollars. I think they might be onto you if you do more than one though. Uh, no, no. You know why? Because if you're smart enough, you do your GitHub check-in to, from somebody else's machine.

I'm telling you. Don't forget the dark web. There is no dark web anymore. The dark, the dark web has, uh, has seen the light. But anyway, I, I, three years, there's going to be a Michael Bay movie about exactly what I'm talking about. There's no way Michael Bay can move to the movie.

There's nothing to blow up. There is totally things to blow up. If you can, if you have the O-Days on the iPhones, I, the Kingsman, remember the Kingsman, everybody's head blew up. You can do that with the iPhones. If you are smart enough, you can blow up everybody's iPhone and go from there.

Just go, go back and watch scanners. Ah, scanners. Yes. Anyway, California has also, uh, defeated the phone decryption bill that came through and the person who even proposed the bill didn't even vote for it. So, uh, we talked about this on up to speed, but States rights, when it comes to cell phone and electronics decryption and encryption, uh, this is, this is a non-starter.

This has to happen on the federal level because you know what? This is a nation state issue because every other nation state says encrypt, encrypt, encrypt. Yes. And we are the only ones who say, give us a back door, dude. And it's stupid. It's ridiculously stupid.

Well, this is the retarded dance that we have to do with our government. It'll go up and up and up. And then, Hey, California did something right. Yay. Um, and I would like to point out that Brian just said retarded after, um, maybe 13 episodes where he yelled at me for that. So we're going to leave that.

Comment of the week. Our first comment of the week is from our Twitter at GOG podcast. A podcast is born, uh, tooted our horn a little bit. Stay in touch with the big news in tech culture with GOG podcasts up to speed. Thank you. A podcast is born.

Whatever you're doing on Twitter. Uh, Grime Life podcast, our friends over there, Grime Life PC cast, uh, said, uh, thanks for all the love, listening and support. We appreciate it. GOG podcast are great dudes. We're great dudes, Jason. We are great dudes. And I love the Grime Life guys. Those guys are funny. Yes, they are.

Andreas Krohn said, uh, you, a friend of the show, shamed me last episode to become a Patreon subscriber. Keep on being grumpy. Well, thank you, Andreas, for being a Patreon subscriber. And, uh, if you have an extra dollar a month, please consider it yourself.

Yeah. And then we can call you a friend of the show like we do with Andreas. Yes. Yes. And at grumpylogeeks.com, we got some, uh, some notes here from Jeff Scopin. Hi guys. The NFL used to be a not-for-profit, not, it used to be a not-for-profit, not tax exempt. It, it reads better than it.

Yeah. You just kind of stepped all over that. Well, no, I read it as is, but it makes more sense if you're, anyways. Okay. It was a not-for-profit. It was never a tax exempt entity. There. That's a better way to say it. This theory being that the individual teams would pay taxes in locations where the revenue is generated.

Don't know how that worked out. Um, I can tell you they didn't. Uh, but given that the teams are owned by really rich folks except Green Bay, it's probably better that the taxes be paid as high as possible in the food chain. I agree. Uh, definitely some weird semantics there and we can definitely, I would love to dig into the finances, but they don't like to release those sorts of things.

No, they don't. I wonder why. Um, okay. So Jeremy Wise says, uh, Jason, awesome chatting with you and Jordan. I had no idea your hometown of Chicago. Let's rap about it sometimes. This is a whole thing about, um, a guy that I talked to the other day called Jeremy Wise.

Um, yes, I just put a link in the show notes, pioneer podcaster behind the art of charm puts craft before tech. This is a, uh, this was just an interview that we did for the observer. Okay. And, uh, it's pretty cool because guess what?

My photos in there and I'm quoted a lot about some of the stuff we talk about on how to become a podcaster or as we say on the art of charm, do not start podcasting because you will not make any money and it will ruin your life.

Oh, you also even got a photo credit there, Jason, with a little photo of, uh, Jordan and Adam Carolla. Yes. Yes. That was a two hour trip up to Napa to get that photo. Oh, that was fun. Okay. And, uh, a non hacker writes in, hi, I'm a college student. Would it be all right if I tried out my skills, pen testing your website?

No, obviously I wouldn't do anything to intentionally crash anything to a level that would require your attention. No. Would that interest you? No. I can give you a report afterwards. No, thanks. No. Okay. Don't touch. Don't touch our website. Look, hosting is a thankless job these days.

Uh, working servers sucks. It's been devalued even beyond the point of web design. Nobody thinks that you should pay for crap. Uh, shutting down somebody's server and making them have to go and deal with the consequences of that means you're spending hours upon hours of frustrating, fruitless, high tech, high, uh, really a lot of education required work.

That you're not going to fucking get paid for. So don't touch my fucking server period. I let one person do it. One person. And guess what? It took me three weeks to fucking fix it.

So don't even, here's the deal. We talked to, we talked about the computer fraud and abuse act before. You know what? This guy put, put a post it up with WordPress logins. You touch my server. I'm coming after you with the full fucking force of the law and I'm going to find you and I'm going to cock punch you because I have a new car and I can drive to wherever you're at.

So do not touch my server period. Hey, non hacker. Thanks for listening seriously, but I, I wouldn't mess around with Jason's servers. No, you can find us on Twitter at GOG podcast on Instagram at grumpy old geeks or at Patreon at patreon.com slash GOG. We have a website at grumpy old geeks.com, which will hopefully still be up when you read this, hear this, whatever, where you can listen to shows, leave feedback, or better yet, ask us questions that we can read on the air.

If you have friends, please tell them about the show and please, please, please do not mess with Jason's servers. And if you like the show, drop us an iTunes review. They really do help us out. And it'll only take a minute or two. Just go to grumpy old geeks.com slash iTunes and it will take you right there. And don't fuck with my server.

Brian, every now and again, you travel to Sweden to find maybe something that you're interested to watch with your lady friend. I often travel to Sweden if there are no other viable options to get something easily.

Yes. Yes. And we, we always talk about going to Sweden and I do have to point this out that my, my little brother, who's 20 years younger than me is the one who came up with the, I have friends in Sweden, uh, we're, we're, we're, we're actually having dinner and he was talking about all these origami books he got.

And I'm like, well, how did you get those origami books? Those are like out of print. And how'd you get them? He's like, I have friends in Sweden. And I'm just like, it took me like three times for him to say it. And I'm thinking, Oh, I get it finally. So yes. When we say we have friends in Sweden, that means we are a bunch of pirating.

Yes. Yes. We, that means we're stealing shit. So to be clear again, and I do mean this, uh, if there is a way to purchase or get it easily and legally, I always do. So the only time I visit Sweden is when I cannot do so. Yeah.

No, that's, that's honestly it. Yeah. I, I, hell, I even, I, here's the funny thing. I downloaded the new star Wars movie, deleted it, and then bought it on iTunes for 20 bucks. And then was pissed off because it still sucked, but you still like it. So you do your thing.

That's all you got to do. Anyway, um, transmission is the application that I use to visit Sweden, right? Yes. Um, there's a thing called a block list where you can actually, uh, put in a URL that will pull down IP addresses that you do not want to connect to most of these.

Oh, so like if you find people that like are always doing the spoof stuff, so you're actually downloading crap instead of what you're supposed to be getting. No, not even that. These are, these are the services that, that report back to the studios on who's, who's actually downloading what.

Wow. So if you would like to be a little bit more private, first, I recommend going to the grumpy old geeks.com slash website. I was going to say slash website, slash website. No, go to grumpy old geeks.com. See, I've been out of this, this game for a year.

Now I'm turning into an idiot. We is internet experts. Yes, exactly. Now go to grumpy old geeks.com. Turn off your ad blocker and in the right hand sidebar, there will be an ad for private internet access, which is the, um, VPN that we use.

I actually just, uh, pimp that recently on my personal Facebook and Twitter. And I had a bunch of friends coming up to ask me what it is. So I had to explain all that. Yes. Yeah. So it, it, it masks your IP address and, and it encrypts all of your communication to said websites. Uh, we, we use that.

And then if you use transmission on a Mac on the PC, go buy a Mac. Um, you can get this block list, which will, which is updated every week. It's on GitHub. It's open source. And what they do is they basically add in all of the trackers who are going to say, uh, yeah, uh, Joe over here just downloaded season one of billions.

Okay. Right. Yeah. Then you get the letter from your cable company that says, Hey, we've noticed that you're a bad boy. And you know, just it, it gets rid of all that stuff. I suppose you'd want to avoid having the, uh, movie or TV industry version of Lars Ulrich come after you.

Yeah. Yeah. That's kind of it. And here's the funny one. I actually did this one time. I downloaded an episode of Deadwood because I missed it and I paid for HBO. So I, I, I, I photocopied a copy of my bill and circled HBO and sent it back to them.

And they never sent me another notice ever again. Nice. Great. Uh, we had talked about how this is Apple's, uh, 40th anniversary this year. Uh, slate put together this great chart of every single Apple product. Well, the major products, not, we're not talking peripherals here, but, uh, every single release of their major products and exactly how much it would cost in 2016 dollars.

So you can go back and figure out how much money you've spent at Apple. Oh, that's interesting. That's interesting. We actually covered a story a long time ago that said, if you, if you would have, instead of buying a Mac invested in, in the stock, we would all be gazillionaires.

Yes, this is very true. Uh, it's really interesting to go back and see this, like the Mac two, which came out in 87, which had an original price of 5,500 bucks. That's $11,479 in 2016. Wow. Uh, the Lisa, which is $10,000 in 83, 23 grand to buy one of those.

Oh my God. So yeah, it goes through. It's got like what, like four bits of memory. Yeah. Something like that. It's insane. So it's a really funny little article. And if you really wanted to go through and you remember everything that you've bought, you can actually total out exactly how much in 2016 dollars you've spent with Apple.

Okay. And that doesn't include the fucking cords that you have to buy all the time. Anyways, I wish they would do that as well. No, no. I, I, I, and here, here's my pro tip. Here's my pro tip for the week. If you go to Amazon basics and you want to, if you need a cord, go to Amazon and, and search for Amazon basics for that cord.

It will save you so much money. I just bought an HDMI cable because I bought a new monitor. The monitor was $80 off. So I got a, a 21 inch monitor that was normally 180 bucks. I got it for 99 bucks, but then I needed, um, like, Oh Christ, I got to go get an HDMI cable for $4, $4, a Amazon basics.

This is like just the low rent stuff that they're, they're knocking out. I've got a camera bag from them. It's high quality and it works. So as much as, as much as we re well, you rail on Amazon, Amazon basics, the stuff that they bit, they make is, is really high quality.

I only rail on Amazon because their services are starting to decline. Like all these companies do. That's all. Well, um, here's a new clever headset that is not declining in quality, which I am looking at this thing. It's on, it's on wired. Um, it looks, you look very stupid, it looks very stupid.

But last time I flew, guess who looked more stupid? The guy who was in front of me in the line at TSA wearing pajamas, carrying a pillow. I, I, I, I'm not joking. No, there was a man, there was a fully grown adult man who was, uh, he was in the, he was like maybe 32 wearing flannel PJs.

A, you know, just like, uh, uh, Hanes white t-shirt carrying a pillow. Yeah. Nobody has going through security. I am so glad he wasn't on my flight because I might've just had to, you know. Yeah.

Yeah. Do your standard thing. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Which we won't talk about because I get kicked off of flights every now and again. Um, so anyway, this is, uh, the clever headrest that, uh, they say, uh, could make flying actually bearable, there's nothing that's going to make flying bearable except Xanax.

So you can check it out. My favorite thing for the week though, is the Lumi bowl. Yeah. Uh, this would have been fantastic back when, you know, I was in my twenties and single. No, no. We have two of them in the house right now. We both love them.

I have a female who I live with and I am a male. And what it is, is it is an led light that you have fixed to the side of your toilet. Then you stick the light inside. And so when you walk into the room, you don't need a nightlight anymore in your bathroom. The toilet glows.

It'd be nice if they could figure out a way to not use a cable that actually has to go into and over the rim of the, of the toilet. I'm just saying that. Dude, I'm sorry. You may be like, you know, posh and have maids, but I clean my toilet all the time by myself.

You wipe it down. It's fine. Um, so my, when I come in my toilet bowl glows red at two in the morning, so I don't have the blue light syndrome where it tries to wake me up, uh, where my, all my damn nightlights were blue. Um, so it's, but it's cool as hell.

And it looks really, it's, it's like 18 bucks from boing, boing. There's a link in the show notes. I've given these as gifts so far. Everybody loves them. It looks cool. I, I, I am going to give them a thumbs down for the, you've got to pee to believe sub headline. That's terrible.

That is terrible. But I tell you what though, get one, trust me, you'll love it. I, I, I really, I got rid of my nightlight in the bathroom and it, the motion sensor only works in the dark. So you're not wasting batteries during the day. It takes three triple A's, which I have rechargeables for.

Um, but when I walk in at night, the toilet bowl just lights up and it's like, have a seat, my friend, you know, and it's great. Okay. I, you, you just have to try it. I can't, I can't explain it. 1799 from the boing, boing store.

You will thank me for buying this. Honestly, you will. I, I, I, I don't get like this excited about things very often, and this is a light that you stick in your toilet. So just, just, just go with me on this one. Okay. Okay. I've tried out, uh, two apps this week, Jason.

Well, actually I've been, I've been trying them out for the past, uh, month. Basically. Uh, I am trying to basically get rid of a lot of stuff. I've got a lot of electronics gear around trying to sell a pool tape or not a pool table, a poker table with a whole poker chip set. I'm trying to sell our road podcaster bike that, uh, since we've upgraded mics.

Well, actually I might buy your poker tables. Let's talk about this. All right. Well, uh, so I tried, I don't know if you've noticed, but, uh, there's a, you know, the big new app war right now is local selling apps. Yeah. There are TV commercials for close five. There are TV commercials for let go. They're all over the place.

I tried them both out, downloaded them, did the whole thing, took my photos, put everything up there. Also, because I'm old school, I did the same and put things up on Craigslist simultaneously. I've sold, uh, three of my like eight items that I'm trying to get rid of every single one of them through Craigslist.

Not a goddamn thing through these apps. That's interesting. Cause I've, I've actually bought a few things on close five. Um, I've, I've had some people write and try to bid down to like next to nothing. Uh, but I, oh, okay. So they're, they're, they're doing the, yeah, they're doing the, uh, you put it up for 200.

I'll give you 20. I'm like, uh, you can go after yourself. Yes. Well, this is grumpy old games. You can't say you can go fuck yourself. Yes. Um, see, that's the problem. We forget what shows or shows that are clean. You start to train yourself not to say naughty things.

Yeah, no, I've, I've, um, I, I tried to sell a dog crate because I, did you forget it? Shut up. Uh, my dog grew out of my, her first crate. She grew out of her first crate. So I was going to sell that on close five and it was $185 crate.

And, uh, yeah, that one I got offers for $40 and then I just donated it to, uh, Cesar Milan's actual place because like we take dogs home all the time. We could always use more crate. So I just gave it away instead of taking your $45. So if you're on close five and you want to offer me $45 for $185 item, I would rather give it away than actually take your offer.

So, okay. So you can do that. So my experience though, far thus far with these apps is that they are ineffective compared to the older methods of getting rid of things, uh, including Craigslist. Um, I would love it. What about a yard sale? Why don't you just have a yard sale? Because a lot of this stuff is just random and the stuff that it wouldn't sell at a yard sale.

I'm getting rid of a lot of music gear specifically. Okay. By the way, I just opened up, uh, let's go. Oh, let go.com. First thing I see there dog crate. There you go. Uh, if you are out there and are selling kind of higher end music equipment, uh, I think you've probably discovered like I do, it's only the cheaper stuff that sells.

If you've got anything that's over a grand, forget about it. Uh, but I did find a site and I sold a very expensive keyboard on it and I've got a couple other ones listed. So if you're trying to get rid of high end music gear, I highly suggest you check out reverb.com. Oh, okay, cool. So that's good for that. And if anybody out there is listening and a podcaster or podcasting, I, we do have, uh, I have a road podcaster for sale.

So if you want that, just hit me up, send us an email. This would be the road podcaster that Brian used on many episodes of grumpy old geeks. So, uh, that's a bit of grumpy old geeks history. Uh, that's, that lowers the price, not raises it. We'll be right back.

Enjoy a word from our sponsors. I read, uh, William Shatner's book about, uh, Leonard Nimoy, uh, recently, and he was talking a lot about, uh, Nimoy's son, Adam Nimoy, who was doing a movie about Leonard Nimoy.

And the first trailer has come out. It's called for the love of Spock. Uh, the link is in the show notes through Gizmodo. It's, uh, there's not a lot in the trailer, but, uh, if you still miss Leonard Nimoy as much as I do, you will, you know, get a little, get a little choked up. Yeah. Yeah. There's a, there, there might be a little dust in the room by the end of the trailer.

I will admit that there was a tissue involved and, uh, I love the title for the love of Spock. It's a great title that it looks fantastic. I watched the trailer. I cannot wait to, to purchase the movie and not go to Sweden on this one because I will pay for this one because, um, I am a huge Leonard Nimoy fan and, uh, And if it gives you pause that it's a son, Adam Nimoy, that's putting it together, I would like to point out that he is actually a director in his own right.

And this is a real movie. So no, yeah, no, this is, this is a, this is a professional production. Yes. And it's going to be fantastic. Yeah. Um, so Charlie Cox, have you heard that name before? No, I didn't either. I had no idea who Charlie Cox was. I, I liked the movie Stardust, which, which you haven't seen Stardust.

Nah. Oh, you're missing out. Um, okay. So this is a Neil Gaiman movie. Oh, Neil Gaiman and another author wrote the, the comic Stardust and then they made a movie out of it. Charlie Cox is the dashing young lad in Stardust.

And it took me a while and I'm like, you kind of do look familiar. And I'm like, holy shit. That's daredevil. Oh, the, the main guy. Yes. It's daredevil. All right. And he's a swashbuckler in Stardust, but you know, he, dude, if you haven't seen Stardust, I know.

Is there any Kung Fu in Stardust? No. Okay. And Chen, Chen John, who is lovely, hates Stardust because she does not like Neil Gaiman, but I loved Stardust. It is one of my favorite movies and it is one of the, it's just done right.

Trust me. Just go watch this movie before next week. I will actually buy it for you. I'll send you a, I'll send you an iTunes gift certificate to watch it today. If you will watch, if you agree to watch it next week, I'm kind of with Chen on the Neil Gaiman thing. I know you worship at the altar. I liked a couple of books, but I'm not, I don't think I want to watch this.

We'll see. So, so if I give you a movie for free, you won't watch it because of your predisposition to not like Neil Gaiman. Is that what you're saying? Isn't that why most people avoid things? Because they've found out that they're not big fans of it. Uh, just checking.

I just, I, I, I don't, I don't know how to actually talk to you right now. I can't, I just can't. Anyway. So yes, Charlie Cox was in Stardust and, uh, keep talking, do whatever you're going to do.

But the next links are yours, Jason. I know the star Wars original trailer came out and it's amazing. I love it. This is before, uh, John Williams did his score and it's just fun. It is a fun trailer. You have to go watch it. Yes.

It's historical. Yes. And there's another video that, uh, is the, uh, force awakens Easter eggs. All of them. You haven't seen this yet. It's pretty interesting. I actually, when I'm watching it, I'm, I was just like, I didn't catch that. Oh, shit. I didn't catch that either.

That's cool. You know, this it's, it's 45 minutes long. It's not short. And there are a lot of Easter eggs. They really put some thought into how to put Easter eggs into it, but they did put a whole lot of thought into the story, but, uh, yeah, no, I liked it. Okay. I'll, I'll definitely check that out.

Uh, one of the things I like in about the real world in terms of star Wars is that, uh, Carrie Fisher, Mark Hamill and, uh, Peter Mayhew who plays Chewbacca are basically like these amazing gadflies on Twitter. Oh yeah. They're the only reason. Peter Mayhew. I love him on Twitter.

He's the only reason to be on Twitter is what the, what those, all those guys are doing. But, uh, Peter Mayhew has started to basically peel back the layers of star Wars and go back into the history a little bit. And he put us, uh, he posted a shot of the original draft of the, uh, screenplay, which basically has Obi-Wan surviving.

No way. The battle against Darth Vader. No way. Yeah. So things changed quite a bit. So a lot of star Wars history is coming out and a lot of it's coming up because of Peter Mayhew. Uh, they've also. Oh my God. I did not know this. That's great. Yeah. It's a little cool description in there. Obviously this is back when it was still called the star Wars as well.

So it's like the Facebook, a fairly, yes. Like the Facebook, a fairly early on version. Um, uh, they talked about C3PO having the red arm in the movie and a book, right? A comic book. And the comic book has come out and apparently I'm going to have to go get this.

I am not a comic book guy, but, uh, there's a, really, I'd never noticed. Yeah. Or a Kung Fu guy or Neil Gaiman. Neil Gaiman. Yeah. Yeah. But there's a story in the verge, uh, about, uh, the comic and the story behind it.

And it's actually, it seems to be a very, very good one. It explores, uh, the place of, of droids in the star Wars universe. It talks about, you know, what, uh, kind of self awareness and autonomy that they have and about how they sacrifice themselves for higher goods.

It's really cool. It sounds like a great story. So I'm interested in nearing it. Okay. When's your birthday, by the way, uh, May 16th, May 16th. Okay. I know what I'm going to send you for your birthday. I have a feeling it's going to be Amanda Palmer, Neil Gaiman related. Well, it's going to be Neil Gaiman related.

I'm going to send you the entirety of Sandman. And I think you're going to change your mind. I really do. I really do. If I send you the entire Sandman series for your birthday and you read it, I will neither confirm nor deny that will happen. Uh, uh, uh, yeah.

Well, here's the deal. I think you'll change your mind. Okay. And no, I've Jason, I have already stated there are some Neil Gaiman things I do like. I just do not blankly like it. And it is in the minority of his works, not the majority. Yeah.

Yeah. No, look, there are some things that I don't even like in his most popular stuff, American gods, I think is his weakest work, you know, and that's going to be a star series coming out this year. So I, I look, I don't, I I'm not. It's not like an Apple fanboy thing.

I, I, if somebody's work sucks, I, I, I call it out. I say that. But you know, you look at Neverwhere, which is one of the greatest books of all time. I think, uh, one of the worst TV series of all time, but, uh, yeah, no, I just, I appreciate his work, but I still think he peaked at Sandman, which when you read Sandman, you will just be like, Holy shit.

This is less over the top. Good. It's really over the top. Good. Cool. Um, and, and speaking of over the top, probably wrong. Bill and Ted three is actually set to start filming by the end of 2016. Alex Winters has said that, uh, we're on track.

We've got some scripts coming that we'd like. And then Keanu Reeves also on the other hand said, uh, nope, scripts aren't there yet. We don't like them. So we don't know. I'm more inclined to believe the guy that doesn't want the money quite so badly. Alex Winters doesn't need the money.

He's a, he's a documentary film filmmaker in his own right. He did the Napster story. He did a couple other movies and he's a teacher. Um, all of which is getting him just as much money as Keanu. No, I, no, I didn't say that, but I'm saying he's comfortable, you know, he, he, he's doing well in his Napster documentary, which we covered on grumpy old geeks was, I, I thought amazing.

You, you watched it too. Yeah, that, that doesn't. Okay. Yes, I did. Jason. Okay. Moving on. Terry Pratchett, uh, who passed away sadly, uh, we're both huge fans of, uh, is releasing. Well, there's a one last thing I think coming out. Hopefully the, the, his daughter, I believe who's running his estate has said they're not going to basically, you know, monetize it and go crazy with stuff.

So we're basically going to get this and this is it. It's called seriously funny. The endlessly quotable Terry Pratchett, which should be a nice wrap up of his career. And some of his best, uh, best, uh, nuggets of wisdom. As it were, uh, there is no release date that I can find yet for the U S it is coming out in the UK first.

And, uh, I think in the next three weeks. Okay. Yeah. They, they, they, they need to leave that alone because when they did that with Douglas Adams and they released the salmon of doubt, the salmon of doubt makes me want to go find whoever published that and beat them to death with that book. Yeah. I, I, I don't necessarily advocate killing someone, but I agree in the theory.

Uh, well, the fact that there was the cat that was half visible and I will never know why that cat, this is the, I'm sure it had something to do with Schrodinger of, uh, obviously, but if you go read the salmon of doubt and you read the first half of the Dirk gently novel that he did not finish, you will want to kill someone because Dirk gently, I think is still better than all of the hitchhiker books combined.

I would be remiss in my duties if I didn't much like point. We point out all Kanye news in moron of the week, uh, mentioned Gwyneth Paltrow again. Uh, she did recently did an interview with the, I believe the New Yorker where she talks about how she likes to get, uh, stung by bees because it's some ancient treatment that was done 10,000 years ago.

And nowhere, my God, I heard this on Kevin and being the other day and they were just just eviscerating her. It was great. It's just, you know, when she's done steaming her vagina, she puts endangered bees on her skin. Wait, wait, wait, wait. You, you can't say steaming the vagina and not explain what you just meant.

That was something that I believe that was a moron of the week about a year ago where she talked about how she liked to get her vagina steamed. And then doctors came out and said, actually, that's it. That's doctors were then saying, this is an incredibly dangerous thing. I don't think you understand the ecology of the interior of the human body and what you're doing.

Anyways, moving on. If you really want to learn more about that, just Google Gwyneth and steamed vagina. I think we have steaming the vagina as the show title this week. Maybe we'll step back. I'm sorry. Yes. Yes. If it was just me, it would be steaming the vagina.

It's like gleaming, gleaming the cube, steaming the vagina, steaming the cube. Well, you can go with that one. Steaming the taco. How's that? Okay. So the next idiot and moron of the week is a company called coolest. Now this is apparently, I don't know how we've missed this in our three years of doing this podcast.

This is apparently the most ridiculous Kickstarter situation that has ever occurred, ever. Okay. It is listed as the biggest disaster on Kickstarter keeps getting bigger. Coolest, the company that pulled in $13 million to fund a cooler.

You know, the thing that you put drinks in and some ice and it keeps old. The interesting thing was there was an actual new cooler on Shark Tank this week. Wow. Yeah. So, so apparently the cooler business is where, where the money's at. As it were. So they got $13 million in Kickstarter money and then they kept delaying shipping and delaying shipping because this happens as we know.

They didn't send it. They didn't send it. Kickstarter doesn't ship on time. Oh, shocking. They still haven't shipped the product to its backers and put it up on Amazon for sale. What? Yes. And now that that's not even it. They've screwed up again now. So according to an update that Kickstarter backers were sent, Coolest is offering backers who haven't received the cooler yet, which is over 66% of them, the option of paying an

extra $97 for expedited shipping for a product they've already paid for. You, you have got to be shitting me. Yes. I think we actually have a soundbite for that. Now, even better, the company has seemingly blown through the $13 million.

from Kickstarter and are seeking an extra $15 million in funding, a third of which will be used to produce and deliver the orders that already exist that the $13 million was supposed to have paid for. Okay. I'm sorry. The creator, Ryan Grepper.

Yes. Needs to go to jail. This is fraud. This is, this is fucking fraud. Oh, it's not fraud. It's crowdsourcing. You fucking idiots. It's fucking fraud. It's fraud. Well, whatever. It's what we've called Kickstarter since day one. Now, unfortunately fraud, while they somewhat deserve it, uh, they have been now doxed and are receiving death threats, um, for a cooler.

Now, how do you fuck up a cooler and get a death threat? That, that is, it's a new level of dumb shittery. That's all I got to say. Figure out how you need $28 million to fund a cooler, but whatever. Anyways, how, you know, there you go.

Moron of the week. And finally, we have one last one. And this relates back to, uh, Jason and our rants about hosting and how it's completely, uh, been devalued. And it's a thankless job that just, you know, gets you yelled at for no money. Uh, some guy maybe kind of, uh, didn't, didn't really believe that because he basically runs a hosting company, but maybe there was some psychological thing, something going on in the background that made him realize how miserable his life is being a hoster.

Uh, so he accidentally deleted his entire company. You had, oh my God. He, he, he did an RM-RF. Yes, he did. His name is Mark Sala. Oh my God. He removed all trace. He removed all trace of his company.

Every single website that he hosted for his customers, every single backup, every single drive, everything with one line. That was my head beating on the microphone. Oh my God. So he's effectively now out of business.

RM-RF slash is pretty much what he did and everything. And he had no other backups off of those drives. Well, point, point number one, he shouldn't have been in the hosting business. If he doesn't have offsite backups, uh, and point number two, if you hosted with this guy, you get what you deserve because he didn't have offsite backups and you should have your own backups, but anyway, what a dick.

The web's not dead. Oh no, it's not dead. Now, every now and again, I come across a site that just really makes me smile. This is fake buddhaquotes.com.

But the tagline is, I can't believe it's not Buddha. Boom. Show title. Uh, yeah. So if you, if you, if you remember the Fabio commercials from way back when, where he says, I can't believe it's not Buddha, uh, yes, then you will get this.

Otherwise we just explained it, which made all the funny go away. Uh, this is a website that, uh, debunks all of the Buddha quotes that people put on Instagram and their stupid little pictures. Uh, no, it's great. It finds all the dumb quotes and the memes that are going out around there right now that are all attributed to Buddha and tracks down where they actually came from, which is very rarely Buddha.

I'd like to shout out to my friend Gamsby and a friend of the show who, uh, scored some, uh, Dodgers opening day tickets. So we went and saw the LA Dodgers at their, uh, opening ceremony. It was pretty awesome. Great game. Looking forward to the season. Also a shout out to my team, Bayern Munich, my German soccer team, which has advanced to the, uh, semifinals of the, uh, European championship.

So super excited about that. Uh, shout out to underworld who I saw live on Wednesday night, uh, at the, uh, tiny. And you very drunk Facebook to your posts on that one. That was great. Yeah, it was an awesome show. It was amazing. You were messed up. That was awesome.

I actually, I've only had two beers cause I had to drive myself out to Pomona. So I wasn't, uh, I was enthusiastic about the show. Enthusiastic. That's what we're going to say. Sorry, officer. I'm just enthusiastic. It's worked in the past. And I would like to give a shout out to lush. Instead, I will give a shout out to lush as tour manager who must be 20 years out of practice because they were unable to play their show last night at the Roxy due to visa, due to visa issues.

So they're no, their tour manager, uh, kind of screwed that up. I'm not too worried because they have already rescheduled the show. Instead of it being the Thursday before Coachella, they will have their two Coachella shows. And then I will be seeing them at the tiny Roxy on the Monday after the second. Are there any tickets available for that?

Cause I might come and join you for that one. Uh, it was a sold out show, but I assume because they've had to move it two weeks and a lot of people were in town for Coachella and got those tickets. There are probably going to be new tickets available. I'm sure I can find it on some site that will eviscerate me for the ticket price, but, uh, I might, I I'm going to go, I think I might go join you for that one.

Cause I, I would like to see lush underworld. I couldn't give two shits about, I like them, but lush. Great. I'll check it out. Uh, the tickets are on sale through ticket fly. I would try that first because I know that a lot of people have probably asked for refunds being unable to reschedule themselves. Uh, give that a shot after that. People might be trying to sell them individually.

Yeah. And, and this is the, the really hard one. I actually sold a lens this week, uh, for my camera because I'm going to go buy tickets for the cure at, uh, the Hollywood bowl. Cool. Yes. This year I'm going to the first show and I'm trying to track down tickets for the other ones.

Okay. Yeah. Cause, uh, on the, on the scalper sites, they're about 250 bucks at this point. It's actually not that bad. Yeah. Well, I mean, here's the deal. I saw the cure at riot fest last year or two years ago, and it was the single best concert I've ever seen in my life.

And you figure they're going to play for at least three hours. Yes. Yes. And that was the upside of living next to the Hollywood bowl. The downside was the parking, but the upside was that I would just open my windows and I could hear people like, Oh, Prince, give me a concert in my home.

The downside being the four hour John Tesh experience. That, that was terrible. And I did, I did go see the music of Lord of the Rings there, which was also, I can't believe that anybody paid for that. I fortunately had free tickets for that one, but my God, the music of the Lord of the Rings was just, uh, Oh my God.

We had to drink a lot. We spent a lot of money on booze that night because it was so boring. Anyway, I got to enjoy it. Anyways. Anyway, thanks for listening. I'm Jason DeFilippo. You can check me out at JPD.me where I've actually started to post new stuff. And I'm Brian Schillemeister. And you can follow me on Twitter at Slender Fungus, where I post maybe one or two times more than I used to in the past, which was zero.

Grumpy Old Geeks is a partially fan supported show. Check out our Patreon page at patreon.com slash GOG. We really appreciate your support. And Jason needs to buy some more coffee. If you don't want to, or can't donate, but still want to support the show, please go to grumpyoldgeeks.com slash iTunes and leave us a few words in five stars or tell a friend about the show.

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